“Yeah. Just a headache.”
“So you won’t be coming out with us?”
“Yeah, right,” Elaine said dismissively.
“Okay. Hey look!” Kendra stepped back a pace and lifted the front of her miniskirt, baring her shaved mound, right there in the kitchen with two guys in the next room!
“Put that down!” shrieked Elaine in a contorted whisper, referring to Kendra’s hemline. “They might see!”
“Don’t you like it?”
Elaine was mortified, but she could hardly take her eyes away. Swallowing the last of her water, she turned back to the sink and refilled the glass. Anything to get the image out of her mind! “It’s fine! Now please. For God’s sake, put your skirt down. Jesus, Kendra. What would someone think?”
“Don’t be silly. It’s just a game. Come on. Now you.”
“I don’t feel like it right now. And not here. This is ridiculous.”
“Okay, then I guess I get the honours of doing the Brazilian. Do you want to be strapped down or will you be a good little girl and lay still? I can’t wait to send out invitations to your streaking debut,” said Kendra, starting to turn on her heels, making for the doorway.
“Wait!” hissed Elaine. Kendra stopped, turned and faced her. “I’ll do it. But this game is getting boring.” With one hand holding her glass of water, Elaine raised her hem slowly with the other, watching Kendra’s eyes. Kendra was staring between Elaine’s legs. “Um, enough?”
“A bit higher,” Kendra said, her voice sounding husky. “Gosh, you’re so hairy.”
“Am I?” asked Elaine innocently, looking down and casting a critical eye over her little thatch of black pussy hair. She wasn’t really. Realising at once what she was doing, she dropped the hem, smoothed it down and blushed crimson. When she glanced up at Kendra, she almost dropped the glass of iced water. Kendra was smiling smugly with her arms crossed. But that wasn’t the worst part. The worst part was the humiliating looks the other three were giving her, leering over Kendra’s shoulders. “Oh my God! You bitch!” cried Elaine, rushing past them in a panic, leaving their mean laughter behind. Slamming her bedroom door behind her, she dove onto her bed and cried hot tears of anguish.
Kendra is a witch!
Five minutes later, Chelsea tapped on Elaine’s door, calling out and waiting patiently for a response.
“Come in,” Elaine sighed, defeated.
Chelsea entered and paused, then walked over and sat on the side of Elaine’s bed. “We’re going soon,” she said softly. “Don’t expect us back tonight. We already decided to fuck them.” Elaine couldn’t think of anything nice to say, so she said nothing. Chelsea filled the void. “Hey. Don’t think for a minute that you’re alone, okay?”
Elaine had been facing away from Chelsea, lying on her tummy. “What do you mean?” she asked, moving onto her elbows and twisting around, looking up at her blonde roommate.
“Kendra’s been giving me a hard time too, you know. She gets off on it I think.”
“I wish she’d just fuck off,” Elaine said, sniffling.
“Just pick your moment. Did you see her face when I hesitated before slapping her ass? That was priceless. And boy, was my hand stinging! Imagine what her ass must have felt like. Um, I mean…”
Elaine giggled and so did Chelsea. “I think it’s the first time I’ve seen Kendra blush!” Elaine said, a reluctant smile breaking across her face.
“She probably liked it,” retorted Chelsea, winking.
Elaine didn’t know what to say to that. So she asked, “What did you mean, ‘pick your moment’? Do you mean I should get her back?”
“It’s the only language she knows.”
“But I don’t know how,” Elaine whined, thinking she sounded like a little girl.
“Just leave it to me. I’ve got lots of ideas.”
“I don’t know…”
“Well, I don’t think it’s fair. She’s just taking advantage of you. I’m gonna get her back, big time.”
“Thanks, Chelsea. But…”
“Hush,” said Chelsea, stroking Elaine’s back and urging her to lie back down.
“Mmmm… That feels good,” Elaine whispered, closing her eyes. It felt so nice she almost fell asleep again.
Almost.
The apartment was quiet. Sitting up on the side of her bed, Elaine shook her head. She ventured out briefly, confirming she was blissfully alone. A sigh of relief escaped her lungs. In the lounge room she switched off the murmuring music system and headed back to her room.
What’s that? she wondered, spying something thin and white under the coffee table. It was joint. She hadn’t had one in ages. The last time hadn’t been so good, but at least this time she’d be alone. Taking the joint back to her room, she placed it on the desk beside her and turned on her computer, making her way to the College website. The joint was promptly forgotten.
Elaine posted eloquent responses to a couple of questions regarding her comment on the virtue of Jean-Paul Sartre’s profound and poignant La Nausée as ‘the birth of Existentialism’ rather than the more obtuse and satirical Being and Nothingness.
She kind of liked Philosophy, but it always exhausted her. Instead of opening her term paper and starting work on it, she closed the open windows and sat back in her chair, rubbing her temples.
I need another pill, she thought, rising and heading for the kitchen.
One more Tylenol later, she sat back in her chair before the computer, a fresh tall glass of water beside her, half full of ice. Elaine was starting to feel better, but she wasn’t in the mood for schoolwork.
She headed for the chat rooms.
She wasn’t sure why. She hoped it would be nice, quiet, and friendly. It was, and she was having fun. She’d made a couple of friends, and one was there. Simone from Vancouver, who went by the name of ‘acquiescent’, told her a couple of jokes about George Bush and Elaine found herself giggling out loud.
“Why don’t you come visit in the BDSM room?” Simone had asked in a private message. Sometimes her English made Elaine smile.
“I don’t think so. Too many weirdos,” Elaine had sent back.
“Hey, I resemble that!” Simone messaged, adding a smiling face.
“I don’t mean you. I didn’t know you went there.”
“Look at my name.”
“I don’t even know what your name means!”
“It means ‘I give in’. I’m not sure about the English. I submit.”
“You submit?”
“Yes, I am, how you say, submissive.”
“You are?”
“Yes.”
“What is it like?”
“What is it like?”
“Yes, what is it like?”
“It is like nothing. It is everything. It gives me… definition. You know?”
“Definition. Okay, yeah. I think I understand.” Elaine had no idea what she was talking about.
“Come with me. It is friendly,” Simone urged.
“I think it’s friendly enough here in the lobby.”
“You don’t understand. I mean… you will like it. Please?”
Elaine sighed. She was kurious after all. Being honest was her new mantra. “Okay, I want to go. I’ve been reading a little. Not much. But if I get accosted, I’m blaming you.”
“Really?”
“Um, yes. I didn’t know what BDSM was.”
“Ah. Okay. Well, anyone who accosts you is not a Dom and you have permission to treat them as the fuckwit they are.”
“LOL,” Elaine sent back.
“True!” typed Simone. “Don’t take any um, shit! Leave if you don’t like it. And don’t compromise. Only call someone Sir, or Ma’am, if you feel like it. No one may demand anything. Submission is given, not taken.”
“Okay, okay. You’ve convinced me.”
“I’ll hold your hand.”
“Thanks, Simone.”
“You are welcome. Oh, and type people’s names exactly as they appear. Names with capitals are the Doms and Dommes. Names with little letters are the subs.”
“I could never be a Dom.”
“I didn’t think so,” said Simone. “Come on, I’ll protect you.”
In moments they had both clicked on the BDSM room link, and people of both genders were flinging greetings at Elaine like she’d never seen before. Almost every person there said hello.
“This is weird,” typed Elaine, sending another private message to Simone.
“Why?”
“Well, it’s like, too friendly. It feels like a cult. Like everyone’s eyes are as big as saucers.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Do you know Amway?”
“Non.”
“Um, never mind.”
“Okay.”
acquiescent proceeded to introduce kurious to those present and lots of different people asked her friendly and playful questions. One girl called ‘Sir Tim’s helena’, said Elaine was welcome to come anytime, to observe quietly or to participate. Sensible questions were welcome and there was no such thing as a silly one.
Elaine thanked her as more of the world of BDSM opened before her eyes.
Observing quietly, Elaine watched as Simone was caught up in the various conversations that evolved in the room. The people with capitals, as a whole, commanded the respect of those without, though a couple of people entered the room and were treated ruthlessly. Not just by one person, but sometimes as a group. At least the subs are respected too, Elaine thought.
“Having fun?” Simone messaged, out of the blue.
“It’s fascinating.”
“Any questions?”
“Hundreds.”
“Hehe. Ask me one.”
“Well, what’s the significance of the capitals?”
“Oh let me see. Some would say it shows respect, and reminds one of who they are.”
“I don’t know what you mean.”
“Just a moment.” Seconds later, Simone had paraphrased Elaine’s question and posted it in the room. Elaine sat dumbfounded, blushing despite herself. “How can I explain the significance of capping?” Simone had typed.
Sir Tim’s helena piped up. She seemed to be one of the ‘senior’ people there. “It’s a practical method of identification, really,” she typed in the room. “Doms and Dommes are capped. Subs are not.”
paper tiger, who Elaine guessed correctly was a male submissive added, “Some don’t subscribe to the ‘rule’. It’s more a suggestion in the name of clarity, than a prerequisite.”
“That’s true,” responded Sir Tim’s helena.
Hmmm, thought Elaine.
“Does that answer your question?” Simone asked privately.
“Yeah. I guess. How do you know who is telling the truth?”
“Hang around long enough and you will know,” she answered cryptically.
Just then, MasterServant entered the chat room and was dutifully greeted. Elaine said hello as well, holding her breath.
“This one is for real,” Simone messaged.
“How do you know?” asked Elaine.
“I met him last year when he came up here skiing. My Dom and I met him for lunch one day. He’s yummy.”
“You sound like you want him!”
“Who says I didn’t get him!”
“LOL. You’re bad.”
“You have no idea,” Simone replied, adding a winking smile.
Elaine watched the ebb and flow of the conversation, hanging on every word MasterServant said. He intrigued her and she was surprised to realise she was getting turned on. After a few minutes of squirming in her chair, Elaine glanced over at the clock by her bed and gasped at the time. She sent a private thank you to Simone, then sent a general thank you into the room for being so kind to let her stay and observe.
In the room a message appeared. “Please wait, kurious. May I speak with you privately a moment?” It was from him! MasterServant!
Leave now!
No, don’t run away!
But he lives two towns over!
C’mon, I’m anonymous!
Holding her breath, somehow her fingers typed a reply.
“Yes, Sir.”
Chapter 05
Awkward seconds passed as Elaine waited, unsure of what MasterServant might say. Though she was expecting his reply, she jumped when the private message box popped up on her screen.
“Welcome to the BDSM room,” he typed innocently.
“Thank you,” Elaine replied, her hands shaking.
“I should tell you acquiescent suggested I speak with you.”
“Why would she do that?”
“She’s probably matchmaking.”
Elaine swallowed. “Oh.”
“I’m just teasing. I’d say she’s looking out for you, making sure you get good information. It’s easy to be taken advantage of, or led astray. Her heart’s in the right place.”
“Yes, it is.”
“Are you nervous?”
“Yes. Very.”
“Why?”
“I’m unsure of myself. Afraid a little.”
“You don’t need to be afraid of me… or of yourself,” he added. Elaine wanted to ask what he meant, but another message arrived. “My name is Gary.”
“Elaine.”
“Nice name.”
“Thank you.”
“Please call me MS or MasterServant in the room though.”
“I will.”
“Good girl.”
Elaine blushed.
Another message came from him almost immediately. “Sorry. Habit.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I just meant calling someone ‘Good girl’ is a habit I have. I didn’t mean to sound too familiar. It’s weird though. I haven’t done that in a long time.”
“Called someone a ‘Good girl’?”
“Well, ‘called someone a good girl without even thinking about it’. Yes.”
“I didn’t really notice.” Dammit, Elaine thought. Already I’m lying. She hurriedly sent a new message. “Wait. I did notice. I, um, I blushed.”
“Thank you for telling me the truth. You made me smile.”
“I did?”
“Yes. Even when it hurts, telling the truth is always the best option.”
“I’ll try to remember that.”
“I hope you will.”
“Um, what if it hurts someone’s feelings?”
“Small lies don’t hurt people’s feelings. Big lies do. Big lies follow small ones. If you don’t commit the first, then you won’t have to commit the second.”
“You know, that kind of makes sense.”
“It’s like saying everything is fine then not turning up for the wedding.”
“Sounds like personal experience.”
“Am I that transparent?”
No, you’re a breath of fresh air, Elaine wanted to say.
He briefly detailed his past and Elaine sat in rapt attention. His fiancé had indeed left him at the altar halfway through last year. Elaine said he didn’t have to tell her why, but Gary said it was common knowledge and went on to explain the situation. Basically his fiancé had not told him of her longstanding love for another Dominant, someone she’d had an affair with a few years before they’d met. When this other man divorced his own wife, Gary was ditched for a pipe dream.
“That must have been terrible.”
“At first it was. Then I was just relieved. It would have been a bad marriage.”
“I agree.”
He talked about the farm he had struggled to keep and about how he was on top of it now and enjoying life. The way he spoke fascinated Elaine. On the one hand he was just a regular guy. On the other hand, their shared interest in BDSM was an undercurrent throughout their conversation. Like a secret. Like something conveyed with a nod and a wink.
But there was something else. Something Elaine could not confess.
The toys.
Sitting at the bottom of her wardrobe, they mocked her. They tempted her. At once she was torn by the desire to experiment with them and the need to read the words Gary was sharing with her. She was nervous and excited. He couldn’t know how hot he was making her. He wasn’t even trying. Was he? If only she could tell him how hard her nipples were. If only she could tell him about the toys.
He would tell me to use them.
Blushing fiercely at the thought, Elaine concentrated, returning to the conversation she hadn’t intended to leave. She wanted it to go on and on, and she wanted to touch herself. With a mighty effort, she refrained.
Mentioning she was in college, thankfully Elaine opened a whole new line of enquiry, taking her mind off her physical distractions. He asked how she was doing, and what she wanted from her life. As he listened intently to all she had to say, Elaine found herself opening up to this stranger. He was attentive and interested. What more could a girl want? Eventually she slipped into a relaxed heat, barely noticing the surreptitious caress of a nipple or the squeezing of her thighs. Before long, minutes had become hours.
Glancing at the clock, she realised it was after one A.M. So much for that paper, she thought, smiling. It didn’t really bother her. She doubted anyone else in the class would have started it either. What concerned her was she was running out of time to play. And she was as horny as hell. “I should be getting to bed,” she typed reluctantly, biting her lip.
“I think I’ll turn in too,” he replied. “I really enjoyed talking to you. I hope to see you again soon.”
“Me too,” Elaine typed.
“Well, good night then.”
“Good night.” Dutifully Elaine said goodbye to everyone in the chat room and she watched as Gary did the same.
In the room Gary typed, “Goodnight, kurious.”
“Goodnight, MasterServant.”
Switching off the computer and sitting back in her chair, Elaine felt her heart pounding in her chest. Was it Gary? Or was it the anticipation of using the toys she’d bought?
She headed to the bathroom to brush her teeth and use the toilet. After moisturising her hands, she grabbed another glass of iced water from the kitchen and made her way back to the bedroom. Deciding not to take any chances, she locked the door behind herself. Putting the glass on the bedside table, her naked pussy lips slipped warmly with each step she took.
I can’t believe how horny I am…
Back in front of the mirror above her chest of drawers, she stared critically at her reflection as she disrobed. Tossing the discarded garments on the one spare chair in her room, the one she called her Laundry Hamper, she stood tall and admired herself, her gaze drawn to her erect nipples, then down to her pussy. Narrowing her eyes and leaning forward, she thought she could see a sheen of moisture at the top of one thigh. Drawing a fingertip between the folds of her pussy, she found her clit and gasped, her knees almost buckling.
Wow.
Glancing at her wardrobe, she hurried over and retrieved the hidden package from behind her shoes and under the black sweater she’d untidily tossed on top of it. Her hands were trembling as she knelt beside her bed and tore it open. Five items fell loose and she put one of them, the lube, on her bedside table beside the glass of water. Ripping the colourful plastic off the others, she stuffed the waste into her backpack, resolving to dispose of it somewhere smart.
She sat back on her heels, swallowing and shaking her head. Laid out on her bed was a pair of adjustable nipple clamps, a dildo, a small butt plug and a ball gag. She and the saleswoman had laughed when Elaine confessed it was going to be hard to keep quiet with the toys. That was when the woman kindly suggested the ball gag.
‘Besides, ‘ the woman had said. ‘It’ll give the experience some authenticity.’
It was pink solid rubber with black straps. Elaine picked it up and looked it over, figuring it out. Fitting it between her teeth, her breath rushed through her nose. Her pussy throbbed as she buckled the strap behind her head.
This is insane. I’m burning up!
Reaching across her bed for the lube, she accidentally dragged her nipples over the covering sheet and moaned through her nose. “Nnnnggg…” Her eyes fluttered closed and she almost knocked over the water. Back on her knees and swaying unsteadily with barely constrained passion, she opened the small tube and squeezed a dollop of the clear stuff onto the tip of her finger. Swallowing was difficult with the gag in her mouth, but she managed as she reached behind herself uncertainly and touched her fingertip to her asshole.
“Nnnggg,” she gasped. Her pussy contracted as she made contact, deliberately moving in circles around the hot, crinkled skin. It felt wicked, bad, and exciting to be lubing her ass. She tried to be clinical and ‘do only what was necessary’ but it was useless. Fuck, that feels amazing. Before she knew it she was gathering more lubrication on her finger and working it into her asshole.
By the time she was lubing the strangely shaped toy, her breathing was ragged and her juices were dripping down her thighs. Shaking with a combination of curiosity, anticipation and fear, she remembered the words of the saleslady in the Adult Emporium.
‘Your poo doesn’t get bigger than this. It shouldn’t hurt unless your asshole doesn’t agree with your mind, and it tightens up. If it hurts, stop. Let the pain pass and try again more slowly. Whatever you do, don’t force it. The trick is to really relax. Feel the muscle relax. You have to FEEL it. And then, if you are having trouble, try pushing down like you are doing a number two. Remember to lube the toy and your ass, okay? Oh, and make sure your bowels are empty, and watch for cross-contamination. And lastly, wash and pee after using anything in your ass, got it?’
The four-inch toy had plenty of give in it and its girth wasn’t intimidating. It shone in the dim light of her bedside lamp and Elaine swallowed, setting her knees widely apart on the carpeted floor, leaning her upper chest on the bed. Maybe I should play with myself while I do it, she considered.
Deciding it was a good idea, she reached for her pussy, trembling as her middle finger found the bead of moisture hanging delicately from her clit. Rubbing it gently in circles, her eyes closed and she willed her asshole to relax. Holding the inverted toy in her other hand, she reached behind herself, touching the tip to the puckered, sensitive skin. It felt like a tongue. She held her breath and tensed, tightening her ass against her will.
This is going to be harder than I thought…
She took a deep lungful of air through her nostrils and tried to breathe evenly. Feeling the muscle release it’s clench, she touched it again, swirling the toy slowly around the tingling, tight skin. Very slowly increasing the pressure, then backing off, over and over, Elaine felt the tension rising as the hole expanded around the slowly invading toy. I can’t take much more, she thought desperately, gripping the gag between her teeth. Gasping in surprise, suddenly the toy slid the rest of the way into her and locked in place.
“Nnnggggg!”
She immediately clenched and the sensation burned. Circling her clit with urgency, she found herself arching her back as the pain ebbed, the combined sensations attacking the pleasure centre in her brain.
Forcing herself to slow down, she gingerly climbed onto her bed, propping herself up with two pillows behind her back. Sitting on the plug felt weird, but it didn’t hurt after a few seconds. She just felt full. And that felt good.
Looking down her body from her diamond tipped breasts to her pussy, she remembered Kendra’s words and agreed she could do with a trim. Running her fingers through the silky hair, she didn’t think she was that hairy. She was wet though. Really wet. And the plug felt really good when she wasn’t thinking of pushing it out. It was a strangely delicious sensation.
She giggled and picked up one of the nipple clamps. She’d chosen ones with little decorative crystals that hung on short silver chains from the rear end of each clamp. With a flat surface between the ‘jaw’ where her nipple was to go, they opened not like a clothespin, but with a little disk that turned in circles. She experimented, watching the jaws opening and closing.
How tight? she wondered.
‘Experiment, ‘ the saleswoman had said. ‘Just clamp the base of the nipple, not the tip.’
Okay!
Opening the jaw again, Elaine manoeuvred her nipple between the flat surfaces, holding it in position while she slowly turned the little disk. Gradually the pressure increased. The clamp wasn’t tight enough to hurt. Between its flat jaws, her nipple felt like it was being firmly pinched, just like she sometimes did to herself only this way her hands were free. Eagerly she attached the other one. So enamoured with the feelings the clamps generated, she tightened them a little more before laying back in the bed, closing her eyes and basking in the sensations.
Her legs fell apart and she reached between them, caressing her wet pussy and gathering moisture on her fingertips. Stroking her clit with two fingers, she almost drove herself straight over the edge.
“Nnngggg Ggggg…”
Oh, God! Not yet! Please! Her hand jerked away, her fingers in midair while the need receded and her breathing calmed. When she felt it was safe, she slowly and carefully pushed two fingers into herself.
Elaine’s pussy was awash with juices, wetter than ever. It throbbed hotly and tightly around her embedded fingers. Moaning pitifully, she slowly withdrew them, then slid them back in again.
“Nnnggg…”
FUCK, this is good…
Breathing even harder through her nose, Elaine fumbled with her bedside drawer before finding her vibe and placing it beside her. She’d bring herself off with it, and she wouldn’t have to be quiet! Experimenting further, she let out a small scream, then a louder one. She was delighted! The gag actually worked!
“Nnggggg!!!” came out of her nose as she fucked her pussy with her fingers a little faster, feeling the bulge of the butt plug constricting the room in there. She was very tight already and couldn’t usually fit three fingers, though she’d tried. When she grazed her clit, making her nipples throb like crazy in the clamps, her eyes rolled back into her head.
“Oooooonnngggggg…”
So intense!
Her fingers were winding up, fucking faster and faster and her breath was almost whistling through her nose. She couldn’t have opened her legs wider as she slid further down the pillows. Her brand new seven-inch dildo would have to wait. She wasn’t going to get to try it tonight. But she didn’t care. She didn’t care about anything at that point. All she could think of was the lit fuse of her desire, threatening to explode at any moment, and the heavenly feeling her vibe would give her when she pressed it to her clit.
She withdrew her fingers and retrieved it. Struggling. Turning it on high, her body begging for release, she slid her fingers back in and started fucking herself furiously. The vibrating toy teased her, daring her to touch her clit as it hovered an inch above.
“Nngg! Nngg! Nngg!”
Thrusting her hips skywards, she made contact and jerked away. It was almost too much. Her fingers fucked harder.
“Nngggggg!!!”
She was shaking, her control wavering, when an image entered her mind. He was standing by her bed, hands casually in his pockets, looking down on her and smiling. His face was a blur, but she knew who he was…
“Cum,” he said.
Unable to stop herself, she pressed her vibrator viciously against her clit, a scream rising in her throat as her body arched.
“NNNNNGGGGGGGG!!!!”
Her fingers flew in and out of her wet, sucking hole, vibrator driving her mad, up, up and over the edge. Her body flexed in a mighty spasm, and she felt her tummy tightening severely, bearing down uncontrollably. Suddenly all hell broke loose as her clit exploded and savage contractions wracked her tortured pussy, gripping her fingers so tight she couldn’t move them as her body shuddered in sympathy. Her hips bucked, the vibe still pushed hard against her clit.
“ARRRGGGGGGGGG!!!!” she screamed.
Without warning her pussy began spraying its load. Her hips bucked again, her body becoming senseless. Streams of juice flew in all directions, distorted by her embedded fingers.
“NNGGGGG!!!!” she managed, a huge spasm jolting her, sending her eyes rolling back into her head. She could feel another orgasm welling up. She couldn’t stop it. She didn’t want to!
She was floating. Consciousness seemed distant. Strangely lucid, yet bodiless. She existed as a thought. A dream. An image of herself. She was happy and saw herself smiling, laughing. The image told her to stop worrying, that everything would be all right. At that moment of blissful exhaustion, she agreed.
Her jaw ached. Opening her eyes, she sat up and undid the straps on the gag. Glancing at the clock, it said four forty-nine and clicked over to four fifty. Her nipples ached terribly and she hurriedly loosened the clamps and took them off. That was a whole new sensation. When the first one came free, blood surged into her nipple and it throbbed painfully, making her gasp. The other would be the same but she had to do it. Once done, she held her nipples and groaned as the throbbing faded away. When she let go, she couldn’t believe how swollen they were.
I hope they go down soon…
Suddenly realising she couldn’t feel the butt plug in her ass, she wondered if she was just numb. Reaching for it, she was surprised to find it wasn’t even there. Huh? Searching around, she found it only a few inches away, and giggled at the image that formed in her mind. Had she shot it out of herself?
Grabbing her vibe and plug and heading for the bathroom, she washed up and remembered to use the toilet. Back in her room she wearily gathered together her toys and hid them under the sweater in the closet, innocently placing her vibe back in her bedside drawer. Mechanically stripping her bed, she folded up the sheets before remaking it with fresh ones. In minutes she slid between them and turned off the bedside light.
I’m absolutely fucked, she thought as she closed her eyes, smiling and nestling into her soft pillow, her legs weak.
As she drifted off to sleep, she remembered visualising MasterServant standing over her, telling her to cum. It had been amazing seeing him there, looking down on her.
What would that be like?
**************************
The harsh alarm sounded and Elaine switched it off quickly, willing herself to rise before she managed to talk herself into sleeping some more. Sometimes it was touch and go. But she wanted to have a productive Sunday and she was good, wrapping her robe around herself, grabbing a towel and heading for the shower.
She ran the shower hard and hot, the cleansing needles of heat prickling Elaine’s skin. Washing thoroughly and occasionally gently, she suddenly had a thought. The girls would freak if I shaved too. Feeling strangely brave, she soaped up her sparse bush and grabbed the razor she usually used on her legs.
Stretching her pliant skin in various directions as she guided the blade, she smiled the whole time. Her skin was going to be sensitive. With long strokes of the razor, the bulk of the hair peeled away. If I was bald like Kendra, that’d throw them for a loop. And a Brazilian would be out. Hey, maybe that’s what she was thinking. Bitch.
But no, always the rebel, Elaine liked how a vertical strip above her clit looked, and left it a quarter inch wide and two inches long, planning to trim it a bit shorter with scissors. Taking a moment to find strays, she was finally satisfied and rinsed under the shower.
After towelling off, she found the scissors under the sink and trimmed her new look perfectly. She really liked it. Why have I never done that before? she asked herself, hands on her hips and twisting a little, admiring from all angles in the bathroom vanity mirror.
Slipping on her robe, she walked back to her room and tossed her towel in the Laundry Hamper. She promised herself to get to the pile of clothes as soon as she was dressed. Glancing out the window through the gauzy curtains, she decided it was going to be hot. From the bottom draw of her dresser, she grabbed her stretchy black skirt and a sleeveless black t-shirt with the details of a concert tour for The Cure printed on the front. Adding a couple of hair clips, she moisturised her hands and applied lip-gloss before she was ready.
Gathering up her clothes and wedging her feet in her flip-flops, she grabbed her change purse and keys and headed for the Laundromat with a textbook under her arm.
*********************
Around lunchtime Kendra and Chelsea returned home. Elaine had made inroads on her term paper. It was half done. She had a plan on how to finish it and had already written a draft conclusion. Music pulsed from the lounge room as she shut down the computer, satisfied with her exploits.
Kendra was in the shower when Elaine joined Chelsea on the sofa. “Hey,” Elaine said as she flopped on the couch. “How are you feeling?”
“Like I went under a bus,” Chelsea moaned.
“Can I get you something?”
“I could really do with a coffee.”
“I’m sure Kendra would like one too,” said Elaine, getting up.
“Let her get her own.”
“Don’t be silly,” said Elaine as she left for the kitchen. Five minutes later they were sipping at their steaming cups when Kendra joined them, taking the single seater and thanking Elaine for the coffee.
“Well, come on. Details!” grinned Elaine, feeling chipper.
Kendra obliged. “We got plastered, went back to their place, smoked weed, and got well fucked. Pretty good night I’d say.”
“Yeah, right,” said Chelsea.
“Oh, stop complaining. You chose him.”
Elaine felt like she was watching a tennis match.
“Yeah, but I didn’t know he’d be so big. It fucking burns. How about a bit of sympathy?”
“Pfft,” Kendra intoned derisively. “I heard you: ‘Oh, oh, oh, fuck, oh, oh, fuck, fuck, ohhh Goddddd!!’”
“Shut up!”
“Tell me I’m lying,” Kendra said, with less feeling than Elaine thought appropriate. Chelsea just moaned, her hand lightly holding herself between the legs. “Have a shower,” Kendra said dismissively. “You’ll feel better.”
Chelsea rose carefully and shuffled toward the door, heading for the bathroom. In a parting shot, she said, “You can be a bitch you know, Kendra.”
When Chelsea had left, Elaine mumbled, “Take it easy. The girl is in pain.”
“What’s you’re problem? Did we interrupt you or something?”
“Fuck off, Kendra,” Elaine said, standing and walking from the room.
“Oooooo…”
She hadn’t been planning on it, but Elaine decided she didn’t want to hang out with her roommates, instead spending the rest of the day in the college library. When she got home around four-thirty, both girls were out.
“We’ve gone to the Rat!” said the note they’d left.
The Rat was the college bar, and Elaine hadn’t been in ages. She thought about going, but decided instead to check out the BDSM chat room. I’ll just stay a little while, she said to herself.
Flicking on the computer, again with iced water close by, she noticed the joint on her desk, sitting quietly, almost beckoning to her. I should probably give that back.
Only a few people were there when she entered. They all greeted her and she responded in kind, thanking them and relaxing, sipping her water. MasterServant wasn’t there. She had to admit she was a little disappointed, though she hadn’t really expected him. After about an hour Sir Tim’s helena entered and Elaine greeted her.
“Welcome back, kurious,” she said. “I’m glad to see you here. May I message you privately?”
Elaine felt strangely wary. “Sure,” she typed back.
The private message box popped up. “Hi. I hope you’re not busy.”
“No, not at all,” Elaine typed back. “Just relaxing and thinking about making dinner.”
“Amen. Listen, I just wanted to say that I like you. You’re okay, kurious.”
“Well, um. Thanks.”
“As you can imagine, ‘newbies’ come in all shapes and sizes. Can I give you some advice?”
“Sure.”
“I just wish someone had told me this when I first arrived. Rule No. 1: Take your time. Rule No. 2: ‘Make sure’ before you commit to anything. Rule No. 3: If you are going to meet someone, always do it in a public place first. Rule No. 4: Always tell someone where you’re going to be. Names, addresses, everything. Someone who won’t give you this info is not trustworthy.”
Elaine copied the rules, pasting them in a new document titled Advice, in My Documents. She was proud of herself for thinking of it. “Thanks, that’s helpful. I’m not planning to meet anyone, though.”
“The longer you stay, the more likely it is that you will.”
Elaine wondered about that before typing back, “That’s interesting.”
“Most bright lights burn out quickly. It’s the embers that last forever.”
“That’s beautiful.”
“It’s from my collaring ceremony. Sir Tim wrote it.”
“What’s a collaring ceremony?”
“It’s the ceremony tying a submissive to their Dominant. Kind of like a wedding.”
Elaine thought about helena‘s words for a moment. “It must be amazing,” she typed.
“It’s hard work, like any relationship. Be careful not to idealise the lifestyle.”
“That makes sense.”
“It’s also true that I could never go back. Once you cross the line into real life, you can’t.”
“Real life?” Elaine asked, not really understanding.
“Well, online is fun. Safe. And if you are honest about your intentions, I have no problem with anyone who is ‘just online’.”
“I guess it’s not respected as much as real life people,” Elaine ventured.
“To those perched its side, the top of the mountain seems a long way up. To those in the valley, it’s a hell of a climb either way.”
“So I’m perched on the side?”
“Exactly. People will respect how far you’ve come.”
“I’ve not come far. I’ve only done a bit of reading. Um, and playing. Not with anyone. I mean fantasising.”
“That’s normal and healthy for the budding submissive. May I ask how old you are?”
“Twenty.”
“Whoa.”
“What is it?”
“Well, sweetheart. I’m forty-three. It isn’t common to be seriously investigating the lifestyle at your age.”
“What is common?”
“Okay, I’m generalising really broadly, but the average newbie submissive would be in her mid-thirties, previously or unhappily married, searching for something that gives her a sense of protection and care in her life. She doesn’t handle domestic stress well and wants to be looked after emotionally. She could have a stressful job. She wants to be told what to do to make her man happy. She is unsure of herself and craves direction. She wants to please her man, but more than that, she wants to be told how.”
“I can see myself in some of those statements.”
“Smiles.”
“I don’t know how serious I am yet.”
“That’s perfect.”
“Sorry?”
“If someone asks, that’s what you say. No need to pretend you’re someone you’re not.”
Elaine thought about her previous persona of Naughtygirl. “You’re right. Thanks for the advice.”
“Welcome. My man is home from golf. I have to go.”
“Thanks for the chat,” Elaine typed.
“See you next time,” helena replied. A general goodbye message appeared in the room before she logged out.
Elaine sat back in her chair, sipping her water and watching the chat room. The conversations could be quite amusing sometimes, which was somewhat surprising. People made lots of jokes about pain and the infliction of it. Elaine just shook her head.
Being careful where she replaced her glass on the desk, she again noticed the joint. “Fuck it,” she said out loud, heading to the kitchen in search of fire. Finders keepers.
Returning with matches, she had just fitted the joint between her lips when she glanced at her screen. Promptly it fell from her mouth, and she fumbled with the matches, putting away the one she’d withdrawn and replacing them on the desk. She found the joint under her chair and put it on top of the matchbox, then pulled in her chair, ready to type.
MasterServant had messaged her. “Hello.”
“I’m sorry,” Elaine typed. “I was out of the room.”
“No need to apologise. It’s good to see you.”
“Thanks. You too.”
“Enjoyed your weekend?”
“It’s been okay. Up and down. Nothing earth shattering.” Remembering the previous night, Elaine blushed.
“Same here. Quiet weekend. Too quiet,” he said. Elaine didn’t respond straight away. She was wondering what he was trying to say. She didn’t have to wonder long as he messaged her again. “I’m still single.”
“I doubt that will last long. Someone will snap you up.”
“What if I don’t want to be ‘snapped up’?”
“Um, I just meant you seem nice, you’ll find someone.”
“I’m just teasing. I knew what you meant.”
“Oh.”
“I’m not in a hurry.”
“Nor am I,” Elaine admitted. She wanted to change the subject. “Can you point me to some good websites?” Without realising it, she’d chosen the one subject they’d previously avoided. She hoped she wouldn’t regret it.
“Sure, I can email them to you.”
Elaine was glad she had a Hotmail account. After giving him her address, moments later she had mail. Opening it, she realised it was from him.
“I just sent you a quick email,” he explained. “I wanted to make sure I had the right address.”
“I received it.”
“Good. I’ll go through my favourites and pick out a few good ones for you. ‘castlerealm.com’ is a standard though.”
“Thanks. I haven’t been there yet.”
“How long have you been interested?”
“About four days, maybe five.”
“How did you become interested?”
“I googled BDSM. I didn’t know what it stood for.”
“And?”
“Well, some aspects intrigued me.”
“They turned you on.”
Elaine bit her lip and typed, “Well, yes.”
“It’s okay to say so. I won’t ask what aspects.”
“Thank you.” She squirmed. She was getting wet again.
“I know it’s bad timing,” he messaged. “But my meal is almost ready and I have to go. I was planning on returning later though, if you’d like to talk some more.”
“I don’t know. Maybe. I have to make something for myself too.”
“Okay. Well, perhaps I’ll see you then. Otherwise, I’ll talk to you soon, kurious.”
“Thank you. Take care.”
A few minutes after MasterServant, Elaine sent a general goodbye into the room as well. Lots of people she didn’t even know waved and said ‘be well’ to her and she thanked them. People are so friendly, she thought as she closed the window.
Elaine made enough spaghetti to feed an army. She froze half of it and left the rest in a container for the girls to reheat. Making her way back to her room with a fresh glass of iced water, she looked around her room, trying to find something to occupy herself. She didn’t want to seem desperate. She wasn’t desperate. She couldn’t deny her desire to return to the chat room, but she wanted to wait. Spying the joint, she sat at the computer and sipped her water.
Oh, what the hell, she thought, picking it up and lighting it. She drew deeply and immediately regretted it, coughing so hard her eyes watered. Once under control, she took several smaller puffs and was able to hold down the smoke as someone had once taught her.
Moments after putting out the joint she felt dizzy and went to lie down for a minute.
**************************
Banging on her door woke her. “What? What is it?” she cried, willing the urgent thumping to stop.
“Oh, thank Christ!” said Chelsea.
“Can we come in?” asked Kendra.
“Sure,” Elaine said, her door opening as she sat up on the side of her bed.
The two girls fell into the room, looks of concern across their faces. “Are you okay?” They asked almost in unison.
“We’ve been knocking for at least a few minutes,” complained Kendra, rubbing her knuckles.
“We just wanted to thank you for the spaghetti. But when you didn’t answer, we got worried.”
“I’m fine, just dead to the world. I found a joint on the floor in the lounge room and smoked half of it. I hope you don’t mind. I was going to ask.”
Chelsea giggled and shook her head. “Don’t worry about it.”
“Listen,” said Kendra. “I hope you’ll agree that we can come in if we can’t wake you after five minutes. You had us worried.”
“Sorry. Yeah, that’s fine.”
“You gonna finish that joint?” asked Chelsea, grinning.
“No. Take it. Please. Hey, what’s the time?” Elaine asked out loud, turning to look at her clock.
“Just after ten P.M.,” answered Kendra.
Fuck!
Chapter 06
For a moment Elaine wondered where the disappointment was coming from. Maybe she was just annoyed with herself. She was usually meticulously punctual. But it wasn’t like she’d promised to meet him. It had just been a ‘maybe’. Shaking her head, she had a new appreciation for the term ‘wasted’.
Who am I kidding? she wondered. The guy could be a nut. Simone said he wasn’t but who was Simone? Maybe HE was ‘Simone’. Surely no one was that devious. She had to admit it was possible. Elaine decided she shouldn’t feel disappointed at being late. Annoyed at wasting an opportunity to chat with him, maybe. But not disappointed. Was it just plain loneliness she was feeling? Or was it simply curiosity?
And why did he have to live so fucking close?
She felt like a moth to a flame.
“I think she’s still out of it,” Chelsea giggled, waving her hand in front of Elaine’s eyes.
“I’m fine,” Elaine said, stretching. “I’m just not used to smoking pot, I guess.”
“For a second there you looked like you had the weight of the world on your shoulders,” Kendra said.
“Come on, Chelsea. She’s okay. Let’s smoke that joint. You coming or crashing, Elaine?”
“Um, I’ll skip. I want to do a few things online. I’ll see you guys in the morning.”
“Okay. G’night. And thanks for the spaghetti, it was great.”
“Yeah. Night, Elaine. Thanks.”
The door closed behind them and Elaine was alone again. Dragging herself over to the chair in front of the computer, she waited while it booted up and connected to the ‘net. Feeling her heart start to thump, she took deep breaths and told herself to calm down.
Relax. I’m not desperate. I’m just kurious.
She smiled as she typed in the chat room URL and logged on.
Again Elaine was greeted by almost everyone there, including MasterServant, who asked if he could speak with her privately almost immediately. “Of course, Sir,” she said, feeling less confident than her words sounded. She thanked everyone for their kind greetings and Sir Tim’s helena winked at her.
She was already blushing before the private message box popped up.
“Hello, Elaine.”
“Hi, Gary. You can just message me. You don’t have to ask”
“All right. Deal. You may do the same.”
“Thanks.”
“Did you enjoy your evening?” Gary asked.
“No.”
“Oh?”
“I slept through most of it. I wanted to come here but I was stupid and smoked some of a joint I found. I fell asleep almost immediately.”
“LOL.”
“Yeah, very funny.”
“I didn’t figure you for a druggie.”
“I’m so not.”
“Well, I’m glad you made it. I’ve been waiting for you.”
Elaine blushed harder. Thoughts swirled and typing suddenly became difficult. “Why?” she fumbled, hesitating before sending the question, unsure if she wanted to know the answer.
“Because I like you.”
It felt like her heart stopped. “But you don’t know me.”
“I know you better than you think.”
With shaking hands, she typed, “Yeah, right.” She had to retype it three times to get rid of the mistakes.
“Okay, let’s see what I know. You can step in at any time and tell me I’m wrong. This is just for fun, right?”
“Um, okay.”
“You are twenty years old and go to college.”
“Public record,” Elaine typed more assertively, though she giggled nervously.
“You have an interest in what goes on in the BDSM lifestyle that is growing daily. You have good parents but they were strict, or at least one was.”
Wow. Yeah, Dad WAS pretty strict.
He went on. “You are a rebel of sorts, but few people really know you. You wish you had friends you could relate to more honestly. You think of yourself as independent, yet you yearn to be looked after. How am I going so far?”
“Um, pretty close.”
“I’m just getting started,” he typed, adding a wink.
Elaine swallowed. “Go on then.”
“You like wearing black. It makes you feel different, but at the same time you can lurk in the shadows, unnoticed. Hmmm… May I take a stab at your personal life without offending you?”
“I don’t know, can you?” Elaine’s mouth was getting dry.
“Touché. I’ll try. Well,” he typed, stretching out the anticipation. “My guess is you are single and haven’t had a boyfriend for a while. As time has worn on, your dreams and fantasies have become more and more extreme. You like to masturbate but you don’t get to do it as often as you’d like. You get on okay with your roommates but you don’t connect with them. You may even be bisexual, find them attractive, and be in denial.”
Elaine’s jaw dropped. He’s gotta be joking. “I don’t remember telling you about my roommates.”
“I’m kidding!” followed a second later.
A clever reply wouldn’t come. She had no idea what to say!
“C’mon, Elaine,” he sent after an awkward few seconds. “I’m just making this up. I have no idea what you might be like or whether or not you are a compulsive masturbator.” He followed his message with another wink.
It made Elaine smile a little. “Sorry. I’m just a bit surprised, I guess,” typed Elaine. “How can you just nail me like that? I mean, I don’t think I am bisexual but I guess I might be. And um,” she hesitated again. “I do like to play… you know, masturbate. And I have been fantasising strange scenarios.” Flashes of the night before crossed her mind and she felt her nipples tingling. They were still a little swollen. “It’s a bit scary that you’re so close to the truth. I mean, I have no idea what you are like.”
“Honestly, they were just lucky guesses. How about you try.”
“I don’t know…”
“Just see where your imagination leads you,” he said, adding a smile.
“All right.” Elaine sat pondering a moment, touching her cheeks and feeling how hot they were. Then she typed, “What about this: You are the urban cowboy type. You always had a desire to live in open spaces, though you grew up in the city. Your parents are ‘laid back’ kind of people who didn’t really mind what you did with your life, as long as you were happy.”
“Pretty close. Keep going.”
“Um… You relied on your own motivation to… go to college?”
“Kind of.”
“Where you studied… um, veterinary science?”
“I wish. Carpentry.”
“Carpentry… but you always wished you studied veterinary science.” Elaine sent a wink of her own. “And let’s see… You worked on building sites and enjoyed it, but now you work on your farm and do odd jobs around town to supplement your income.”
“Okay, this is getting freaky.”
Elaine grinned before continuing. It was fun. “You thought you were in love a couple of times, but those experiences paled in comparison to your dearly departed fiancé.”
“She’s dead to me!” he typed uproariously.
The Soprano’s accent was almost audible and Elaine laughed out loud. Remembering their previous conversation, she typed, “Um, but you were angry and annoyed and confused when she left, though in the recesses of your mind you always thought there was something wrong, though she denied it.”
“Public record.” He added a smiley with its tongue poking out. “Sorta.”
“Let’s see. Oh, and you found out about the lifestyle when you overheard a conversation in a line-dancing bar over a gin and tonic.”
“Ahahahahaaaa!”
“No?” asked Elaine, giggling and visualising him laughing at his desk. “Was it a dry martini?”
“Well, um… No. I’m strictly a ‘bourbon and beer’ kind of guy. Though I don’t mind a good wine now and again. Line dancing is out though, I’m afraid. I’m very much influenced by my parent’s taste in music. Led Zeppelin; Rolling Stones; Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young; that kind of thing. So you wouldn’t find me in a line dancing club.”
“Awwww,” Elaine typed, still giggling.
“Oh, please. Don’t tell me you’re into that stuff.”
“Noooo! No, I was jesting.”
“Good. I’d hate to have to beat it out of you,” he typed, again the winking smiley followed his words.
Elaine had seen that kind of comment in the room before, but this time it made her stop and think. It was also enough of a hesitation for Gary to fill the void.
“Okay, enough kidding around,” he typed.
Elaine’s thoughts stalled. Only one thing came to mind to type. “Yes, Sir.” Yet another moment passed and she wondered what he was thinking.
“Do comments like that concern you?”
“Yes,” she typed before she knew it.
“I imagine they could be a bit off-putting. Okay, let’s make use of this time more constructively. How about a bit of Q & A?”
Elaine was glad for the opportunity. She had millions of questions. The first one was chosen because it was on her mind. “Okay, thank you. Why do people make comments like that?”
He smiled before answering. Elaine wondered if she’d asked the right question. Or at least a good one to get the ball rolling.
“I’d say because it’s an exaggeration, and therein lies the humour. It’s like saying I’m going to get fit by running around the world. It’s funny. Not hilarious, but it’s enough to make people smile.”
“Okay, I get it.” Hesitating with her fingers over the keys, Elaine tried to frame her next question, the one she was dying to ask. Gary must have sensed it because he didn’t fill the void. Finally she typed, “How were you introduced to the lifestyle?”
“An ex-girlfriend introduced me a long time ago.”
Oh. Elaine for some reason had imagined a more prophetic answer. She swallowed and moved on. “I love your stories. But is it really like that?” Immediately after sending her question, she knew it wasn’t framed well.
And he knew it too. “I’m not sure what you are referring to.”
“Well, you have these kind of idyllic situations, where the Dom and the sub are so ‘in tune’. Is it really like that?”
“I wish. I think it can be when both parties are honest and communicative. I just haven’t found my girl yet.”
Elaine swallowed. “Would you do the things you describe in your stories to ‘your girl’?”
“Sure. But only if we agreed to that course of action. Submitting to a Dom is a huge commitment. You know the words in the old marriage vows? ‘Honour and obey’? They are the pivotal words in a Dom/sub relationship. Once agreed to, many things follow because of them.”
“Can you please elaborate a little?”
“Sure. Your submission, to a particular Dominant, is called your ‘gift’. It’s called a gift because it is something only you can give. It cannot be taken or stolen from you. It is yours and only you can choose when and to whom you will give it. However, once given, you are placing your submissive nature in someone else’s hands, to do with as they please, within reason. You can of course take it back. But that is usually when the relationship ends. It means you have to be incredibly careful and sure of a person before you submit to them. Remember to take your time.”
Elaine was riveted, and hoped he would continue. He didn’t disappoint her.
“When I say, ‘within reason’, I mean safely, sanely, and consensually. Or SSC. You may have seen this noted in the reading you have done. More recently ‘RACK’ is becoming the vogue. RACK stands for Risk-Aware Consensual Kink, and is probably a bit more accurate as a description of ‘what we do’. We go into a scene or a situation with our eyes wide open, knowing what the risks are, and aware of the need for safeguards to protect those involved. We know this stuff is kinky, and we don’t deny it. We just make sure the risks are known and agreed to before we undertake them.”
“The idea makes my skin crawl. No, that’s not what I mean. I mean, it just makes me incredibly nervous. Like, really scared. The whole idea. And yet, I feel like I have this need inside. Is that normal?” Elaine felt like her thoughts were going all over the place. She wondered if she was making sense. Gary didn’t help. Not at first, anyway.
“I don’t know.”
“You don’t know?”
“No. I honestly don’t know what the word ‘normal’ means. If you mean ‘normal’ for a vanilla person, I’d say no, it’s not normal. If you asked if it’s normal for a submissive, I’d say it was completely normal. So it depends on your perspective, not mine.”
“How do I know if I’m a submissive?”
“That is an excellent question.”
“Thank you, Sir,” typed Elaine, smiling at her words. It was getting easier to call Gary, ‘Sir’. She hardly even noticed it until after she’d hit ‘send’.
“I think most wives, and husbands for that matter… okay now I sound sexist. I mean, I think most spouses like to please their significant other. Whether it be making a nice dinner or bringing them flowers or doing something for them so they don’t have to do it themselves. It makes the other person happy, and that’s why they do it. The crucial difference with the submissive person is that it pleases them. It makes them happy to be doing something that makes the other person happy. It isn’t a chore. It actually makes them smile. Or makes them excited.”
Elaine swallowed again, crossing her legs. “You made that clear in your stories. Um, thank you for them, they’re pretty enlightening.”
“They are fiction, and nothing like real life. Well, no. That’s not true. Stories, photos, things like that… they’re like seeing real life in a mirror. Like a two-dimensional reflection of what life is really like. Being there is incredibly intense by comparison.”
“Yes, um… I can sort of imagine.” Trying to return to her thoughts, Elaine typed, “So, to be a submissive, I would have to enjoy ‘doing’ the thing that pleased you, rather than ‘enjoying seeing how pleased you were’ because of it?”
“Not ‘rather than’. The sub would enjoy both experiences.”
“That’s a pretty subtle difference.”
“I agree. It doesn’t take a lot to tip a ‘normal’ (there’s that word again) woman, into submission.”
“What does it take?”
“Good question. Again, I don’t know. I certainly don’t have all the answers, but I could hazard a guess.”
“Please do.”
“Well, let’s make some assumptions. Firstly, we are talking about heterosexual relationships here, where the potential submissive is female. Secondly, we assume that most women want one man to satisfy every need that man is capable of satisfying. Thirdly, they want the security of being bound in some way to that man, ie. marriage etc. And lastly, they are willing to compromise greatly if that man is capable of satisfying the great majority of their needs.”
“Sounds plausible. In fact, it’s a pretty succinct description of most of the relationships I’ve witnessed.”
“Okay. Then given these admittedly assumed ‘facts’, then there would need to be a defining moment, a ‘time’, where despite the woman’s (or submissive’s) commitment to these facts, she felt that there was something missing. This ‘void’ in her life is significant enough to cause her to investigate further, sometimes leading her to the door of BDSM.”
“I didn’t feel like that though. It just seemed ‘right’ when I read about it. Well, not all of what I’ve read. I’m really conscious of the ‘consensual’ bit.”
“Good. You should be. Everything that happens should be agreed to in advance. Okay. Let’s talk hypothetically. It might be easier to understand.”
“Okay,” typed Elaine, not at all sure what he might say.
“Let’s say you and I are a D/s couple.”
“D/s?”
“Dominance and submission.”
“Oh, yeah. Right. Sorry.”
“It’s okay. So, assuming we are a D/s couple, we would have come to certain agreements.”
“Such as?”
“Such as, if you were to talk back to me in say, a mocking tone, I would be within my rights to spank you forcefully. Or if you embarrassed me intentionally in company. Or if you hid something I was trying to find.”
“But that might just be a joke.”
“Which is true. And in which case the punishment may be playful, but the joke would need to be obvious.”
“How would I do that?”
“Maybe by winking when you said you had no idea where it was.”
“That’s a bit sassy.”
“It’s called ‘bratty’ in the lifestyle. Which is like, ‘provoking deliberately’.”
“Some subs do that?”
“Sure.”
“Why?”
“Some like to be punished, I guess.”
“I’d hate to be punished. It would mean I’d done something wrong.”
“Good. But this is a little different. It’s like an understanding between the two people involved. A little provocation means a little punishment. And that’s what the sub desires, so she provokes gently. Thus, she’s ‘being bratty’.”
“Okay. I’ve seen comments about ‘brats’ in the room before. I wondered what they meant.”
“And now you know.”
“Yes. Okay. So, given that I’m not being bratty,” Elaine typed, uncrossing and recrossing her legs. “If I just made a mistake, would you punish me?”
“Sure. Perhaps not physically. It depends on the nature of the mistake. Most subs are treated strongly early in the relationship, to reinforce the Dominant’s desire for the submissive to do better, and to reinforce her feelings of submission, which is her ultimate desire.”
“But,” typed Elaine, feeling a little foolish. “Doesn’t it hurt?”
“Yes. As it should. Did your Daddy ever spank you when you were a little girl?”
“Um, yes.” Elaine’s mouth was going dry again. She licked her lips. “Once or twice.”
“Did you ever repeat what you were punished for?”
“No.”
“Case closed.”
“So it’s a punishment, and a deterrent.”
“Yes. And one other thing too. Once punished, if you are contrite-”
“Contrite?”
“Remorseful.”
“Okay.”
“If you are remorseful, and genuinely appreciative of the correction, then guilt is cleansed and you start again with a clean slate.”
“Thankful?”
“Yes. From my experience, the one thing the submissive cannot stand, is ‘indifference’. A Dominant who cares enough to correct her when she is wrong, rather than not caring at all, is one to hold onto. Being thankful for his desire to see you do better is natural.”
“I see.”
“Do you?”
“I think so. I mean, my experience with men is rather limited. But I know what I want.”
“What do you want?”
“I want someone I can respect, who is honest with me and caring. Someone who takes me places I’ve never been before. Someone I can trust.”
“Your expectations are realistic.”
“But I’ve never met anyone like that.”
“Yes you have.”
Immediately Elaine knew Gary was speaking of himself. She swallowed. She wasn’t ready for any of this. It wasn’t that things were moving too fast. The fact that things were moving at all was terrifying, but his confident assertion did nothing to allay her fears. All it did was make her hands tremble and her scalp prickle.
Once again she was dumbstruck.
“Um, someone just asked you something in the room,” Gary typed.
“They did?”
“Yes. Simone asked whether or not you needed oxygen. Send her a tongue poking out.”
Elaine did. It was with relief she realised Gary was letting her off the hook. In the room Simone asked if she was having fun and Elaine replied that it was all very interesting and that MasterServant was a good teacher.
Gary added, also in the chat room, “I’m only as good as my best student.” As other Dominants in the room agreed, Elaine blushed strongly, feeling her nipples throb. Why does he have such a strong effect on me? Would it be the same with any Dom?
She remembered a question and messaged him privately again. “I keep meaning to ask you something, then forgetting. What does your nickname mean? It almost sounds like a contradiction.”
“I am both a Master to my woman, and her Servant. I will do everything in my power to give her all she needs to grow into the role I envisage for her. I will nurture her, and encourage her, I will correct her where necessary, I will adore her for the pleasure she gives me, and I will honour her by my actions, both privately and publicly. It says a lot about me, my nickname.”
“I can see how it makes sense now.”
He sent a smile. “It’s getting late. I hope you don’t have to be up early.”
Elaine checked the time in the corner of the computer screen. She was horrified to see it was twelve fifty-one. “Oh, no. I didn’t realise it was nearly one A.M. I really have to go. I have work tomorrow, then class. I’m sorry, I wasn’t watching the time.”
“No need to apologise, Elaine.”
“Thank you, Sir.”
“You don’t have to call me ‘Sir’.”
“I know.” Elaine sent a smile.
“Thanks again for talking to me,” he typed. “I really enjoyed it.”
“You sound surprised.”
“I am.”
“Why?”
“Because I am. I haven’t talked like this to anyone in months.”
“Like this?”
“Yes, like this. Talking and explaining. And I won’t deny liking you. I won’t deny I know little about you, either. But what I do know, I like, and I’d like to keep talking to you, for as long as we both feel the same.”
Elaine re-read what he’d written, her fingers poised over the keyboard. Taking a deep breath, she typed, “I’d like that too.”
“Good. Then I’ll see you soon.”
“Here?” Elaine asked, immediately regretting having asked. There goes ‘not sounding desperate’, she thought.
“Sure. Just come. I’ll run into you soon enough. If I don’t, I’m sure you’ll find friendly faces.”
Why did he have to seem so much cooler than her? So much more in control. Elaine had been shaking and feeling on edge all night. She wasn’t sure why. Where was this going? She put that question on the back burner.
“Everyone is very kind. Okay, I better get to bed. Thank you again, Sir. I learned a lot tonight.”
“You are welcome, Elaine. Sleep well.”
“Goodbye everyone,” she typed, sending it into the chat room. “I have to get to bed.”
Again the friendly room made her smile with their waves and good wishes, telling her to return soon. She promised she would and she knew it was a promise she would keep. Before leaving, she sent Gary one last message. “Good night, Sir.”
“Good night, Elaine.”
She switched off the machine. Sitting back in her chair, she uncrossed her numb legs and sighed. Her nipples pulsed they were so hard. Looking downward, she realised they were still quite swollen, which would explain the ache. Opening her legs, she made to stand up and noticed she was wet too. Very wet.
I’m turning into a nympho, she thought, then giggled.
There was nothing she could do about it though. Despite her roommates having already gone to bed, a fact she confirmed when she went to brush her teeth, she wouldn’t risk waking them with a masturbation session. Just thinking about being caught made her blush harder. She wondered when next she’d get the chance.
After setting her alarm and lying down in the dark, she was just dropping off to sleep when her eyes jolted open.
Shit! I told him what time it was! He knows I’m in the same time zone!
It took Elaine five minutes to convince herself it was okay. Nothing had changed. She was still anonymous. Should she tell him she lived close by? Surely it would be okay to keep that kind of information private until the appropriate time.
What was it he’d said?
‘It means you have to be incredibly careful and sure of a person before you submit to them. Remember to take your time.’
She fell asleep with her hands between her legs, promising herself she would.
Erotic dreams tormented her. Once during the night, she’d woken in a sweat. For a moment she thought she couldn’t move. Gary had tied her up and played with her for hours, though in reality it could have been mere moments. He hadn’t let her cum. She wasn’t allowed. In the dream she remembered begging him, more and more urgently, her spine tingling with the desperate need for release.
Making her way to the kitchen for a glass of water, it became apparent she had to make a detour to the bathroom. Her hands were damp and her juices were running down her legs. Her skin was aglow, tingling all over. Her nipples were rampant and she brushed lightly over them once she’d cleaned up.
“Mmmmmm…”
She hoped she could get back to sleep.
She had a big day coming up.
Chapter 07
Elaine’s mail sorting job didn’t require a ‘uniform’ as such, but she had a standard set of clothes she wore, both to keep things simple and because competing with others in the fashion stakes wasn’t her thing. Thankfully it was a pants and blouse set, and her bra was clean after washing it the day before. The pants were black, as usual, and a little low on the hips, but they were loose and comfortable, almost flared. The blouse was a reasonably stylish white ‘business shirt’ cut, which could hardly be described as pretentious.
She was almost ready to head to work, her hand holding the knob of the apartment door, when Kendra stuck her head out of her bedroom and asked, “Elaine, could you come here please?”
The request was so sweet Elaine became immediately suspicious. “What is it?”
“Just come down here a minute,” Kendra said, as though it were a chore.
“All right. But this better be important. I have to get to work.” As Elaine got closer, it became apparent that Kendra was naked, though she was doing her best to hide herself behind her mostly closed door. “What is it?” Elaine asked as she stood waiting, her hand on her hip.
Kendra looked her up and down. “You have a bra on.”
“So? I washed it yesterday. I always do my washing on Sunday.”
“Okay. What about knickers? Come on, checking time. Can’t have you going to work and cheating.”
Elaine started to blush a little then remembered her shave job. The though made her braver. “Whatever,” she said, putting down her bag and undoing the button at the top of the fly.
“What’s going on?” asked Chelsea, joining the impromptu gathering. She had a towel under her arm and was heading for the bathroom.
“I’m making sure Elaine is still playing the game,” Kendra said, winking in Chelsea’s direction.
“You never give up, do you? I suppose you want to check me as well.”
“Tadaaaa,” said Elaine, lowering her black pants to mid thigh, thrusting her pelvis forward provocatively. She held her breath as she awaited her roommate’s reaction.
“Oh my God,” squealed Chelsea, breaking into giggles and covering her mouth.
“It’s a Mohawk!” Kendra shrieked, her jaw dropping.
Elaine just grinned, pulling her pants up and tucking in her blouse. “Satisfied?”
“Yeah, yeah. Go on. Go to work, little Miss Conscientious,” Kendra giggled, shaking her head.
As she was closing the apartment door behind her, Elaine heard Chelsea yell, “It looks good!”
With a spring in her step, Elaine headed down the stairs to the bus stop on the main road in front of the apartment complex, passing lots of students heading in the opposite direction going to class. She’d be joining them in the afternoon. But for now she had four hours of dull mail sorting to do downtown at the clearinghouse. And with a National Geographic conference approaching, it was going to be hectic.
At least time will fly, she convinced herself.
Hopping on a cross-town bus, she found herself sitting next to a good-looking older guy in a business suit. He smelled nice and Elaine got to thinking.
Imagine if this was Gary. God, I’d just fucking die. She glanced across at him. He was reading a book. If it were Gary, he’d talk to me. He wouldn’t be shy, that’s for sure. He’d probably look across at me and say something like…
Jeez… I’ve no idea what he might say…
Elaine sat up a bit, straightening her back.
He’d probably just glance and smile. Though I doubt he’d be on a cross-town bus at 8.30 A.M. I guess he might be. He might have a meeting at the bank. Or maybe an appointment for something. God…
She swallowed nervously. Glancing covertly around the bus, she wondered if there were any other subs or Doms nearby. A guy of about thirty got on and winked at her as he swaggered past. He was unshaven and looked a little dirty. Hmmm… she thought. I doubt he’s a Dom. I guess he COULD be though. Probably more likely to be in advertising or something. Maybe a music teacher…
She smiled at her thoughts. Of course a teacher or artist could be a Dom, she reminded herself. In fact, she doubted whether anyone couldn’t be a Dominant. Or a sub for that matter. Not based solely on their job, anyway. It had more to do with their demeanour, she guessed. Like, ‘how they held themselves physically, and how they related to others’.
Yes, that makes more sense.
“Er, excuse me,” the businessman beside her said, catching her unawares.
“Yes?” Elaine asked.
“This is my stop,” he said with a smile.
“Oh. Sorry. I was off with the fairies,” Elaine said apologetically, turning her legs so he could exit.
“That’s perfectly all right,” he said, glancing back and smiling at her before he got off the bus.
Elaine blushed.
Work was okay. Todd Whatshisname from Payroll harassed her again. He was the one who groped her in the supply closet at a weak moment during the last Christmas party. Usually he sickened her, even though she had regularly masturbated to the memory in the past. She just wished it were someone else.
Like Billy.
Billy Cosgrove worked part-time like Elaine did, and they only ran into each other on Mondays and Thursdays. He worked Tuesdays while Elaine worked Wednesdays. Billy was a hunk, even though he didn’t know it. Elaine often put Billy’s head on Todd’s shoulders in her fantasies. But Billy wasn’t the type to ask her out, even though Elaine thought she’d accept if he ever worked up the nerve. She figured if she was the virgin, then Billy wouldn’t have discovered his cock yet. That thought kept her smiling through most of the morning.
By the time she’d arrived home, changed and headed to class, she was back in her black skirt and flip-flops. Perhaps the figure-hugging maroon tank was a little risqué without a bra, but she had to save the damned bra for work on Wednesday. Elaine wasn’t sure what she’d do Thursday. Maybe wear a sweatshirt and die. She prayed for a cold snap.
One moron in class couldn’t help but comment. Elaine was thankful his words weren’t within earshot of others. Or the Professor. Why did guys think that observations like, ‘Hey baby, you’re looking good’, would instantly have her running into their arms? Just about any dickhead could tell she was ‘looking good’. If he hadn’t been looking at her tits when he said it, she may have even enjoyed the compliment. She sighed.
Oh, well.
At least her classes were done for another day. The year was passing quickly.
Damn, I hate these fucking steps, she thought, trudging up the last of them. She stopped three-quarters of the way up the final flight and looked around. Imagine running up and down here naked… she pondered, leaning on the railing and looking out over the quadrangle.
What happens if no one loses this stupid bet?
That’s not going to happen. They’re going to gang up on me. I just know it.
Pushing open the front door of her apartment should have been a relief, but with her suspicious thoughts, it wasn’t. Even once in her room, Elaine couldn’t shake the feeling that tonight she had to watch herself. She swapped her tank top for a loose white t-shirt and threw her flip-flops into her closet next to the black sweater that hid her new toys. She almost closed the closet door before she decided to check on them.
They were all there, just as she’d left them.
There was even an aroma of something tasty wafting through the apartment from the kitchen. Chelsea must be cooking something, Elaine thought, remembering Kendra couldn’t cook to save her life.
Fuck. I’m being stupid, Elaine thought.
She took a deep breath, again determined that she wasn’t going to be the one nakedly running up and down those damned stairs. In the kitchen, Kendra and Chelsea were chatting away, Chelsea slaving over the stove, while Kendra had a textbook open and a blank sheet of paper in front of her. They both greeted Elaine normally, which she found quite a relief.
“Hey Elaine, how was work?” Kendra asked as she picked up a pen, though Elaine wasn’t sure if she knew what to do with it.
“It was okay.” Elaine addressed Chelsea. “Something smells good.”
Chelsea smiled at Elaine and asked, “Are you hungry? I’ve made a ton of this pasta.”
“Smells like that chicken and broccoli one. Need a hand?”
“No, it’s all right. You could set the table though.”
“It could be pheasant’s breast for all I care. I’m starved,” Kendra said, not raising a finger to help.
I guess she might have asked if she could help before I arrived, thought Elaine, retrieving the knives, forks and cheap paper serviettes. “Maybe you could make that tomorrow night, Kendra,” Elaine suggested, smiling to herself.
Chelsea looked at Elaine and they both giggled. “Yeah right,” said Chelsea. “Kendra couldn’t cook an egg to save herself from starvation.” They both laughed but it wasn’t spiteful.
Elaine winked at Chelsea as she had an idea. “Kendra,” she said, setting up the table for their meal and grabbing her roommate’s attention. “I think I’d like to check whether you’re wearing panties or not.”
Kendra hardly moved except to pick up her textbook for a moment. “Can’t you see I’m trying to write a paper?”
“Bullshit,” Chelsea interjected. “You’ve been trying not to write that paper for the last hour.”
“Well, you haven’t been any help,” Kendra responded, a little too flippantly.
“Hey,” Chelsea said, banging the plastic spoon she was wielding onto the bench. “I always help with your papers if I can.”
“I know,” Kendra said softly, immediately realising she’d stepped over the line. “Sorry. I’ve just had a bad day. I didn’t mean to take it out on you.”
Chelsea made a sound that made it clear she was none too pleased. “Hmmph.” She wiped off the bench and ladled out the pasta and sauce without another word. Elaine thought better of interrupting the tense silence. When they’d all finally started eating, under her breath and with a mouthful of pasta, Chelsea said, “We’re all gonna get fat.”
With a mouthful of her own, Kendra giggled and almost choked. After swallowing and recovering, she started laughing while trying to tell the others what she was thinking. “I was just trying to say… ‘Who cares?‘… ‘Cause it tastes so good,” she laughed. “But… I think it’s going to… choke me to death!”
All three of them cracked up at that.
Shaking her head but still smiling, Chelsea looked right at Elaine and added, “And yeah, Elaine. I agree. I think Kendra should show us whether she’s still in the game. Only it should be a punishment for being so mean to me.” She and Elaine shared a wink.
“Heyyyy,” said Kendra, sensing an ambush. Then with a wicked thought, she answered, “All right. But turn about is fair play.”
Elaine and Chelsea looked at each other then both said almost simultaneously, “Huh?”
“Well, if we’re going to use ‘checking’, as a punishment, then we should all abide by that rule.”
Elaine giggled. “But you don’t even know what the punishment is yet.”
“Exactly,” Kendra said blankly, gazing intently at Elaine. Elaine thought the corners of Kendra’s mouth were going to turn up into an evil smile at any moment. “I can take anything you could dish out.”
Such was her stare, for a moment Elaine thought Kendra was speaking only to her. She felt the blush rising in her cheeks. What am I getting myself into? she wondered. Before she could send a cancel message to her brain, she’d said, “You’re bluffing.”
“Do your best,” Kendra said, slowly turning to Chelsea, who had watched the whole exchange.
“The punishment has to fit the crime though,” Chelsea said. “And nothing illegal. We don’t want to get in trouble with the police.”
“Or campus security,” Elaine added.
“Agreed,” said Chelsea.
Wracking her brain, Elaine tried to think why this might not be a good idea. Either it wasn’t working, or she couldn’t think of anything on such short notice. In any case, she submitted. “Agreed.”
Kendra glanced at Elaine and winked. Then to Chelsea she said, “Okay, so what’s it gonna be? And remember, I am sorry. I didn’t mean to seem ungrateful.”
“Yeah, yeah. Whatever,” Chelsea said, wiping her mouth with a serviette as she sat back in her chair. “I think you should stand up right here at the table between Elaine and I, and lift up your skirt so we can check. And,” she paused, for dramatic effect. “Hold it up until one of us tells you to put it down.” She winked at Elaine and they both giggled.
Elaine could feel her cheeks getting hotter. She was going to be about a foot and a half from Kendra’s pussy. She wasn’t sure whether it was the embarrassment over being so close, or the thought that it might be her next that made her nipples harden. Desperately she willed them to stop but it was useless. With every passing moment they were getting harder, filling slowly with pulsing blood, a soft thrumming, beating like distant drums. Elaine swallowed. “I’m just about full,” she said, getting an idea. Unbuckling her belt, she pulled her t-shirt out of her pants and let it hang loosely, hoping her nipples would be less noticeable. She leaned forward again. Though she was happy with the result, by then her ears were burning.
“Fine, but can I finish my meal first?” Kendra whined. “I wouldn’t want to put either of you off your dinner.” She winked at Elaine, adding that evil smile that seemed to taunt. “Besides, my food will get cold.”
As soon as Kendra turned back to Chelsea, Elaine stole a peek downward, seeing for herself her pointed nipples, pressing insistently against the cotton fabric of her shirt. She felt her pulse quicken. Battling for supremacy in her mind were the twin thoughts of her own embarrassment and Kendra’s exposure, in close-up, and right before her eyes. It was going to be the first time she’d seen someone else at close range, male or female, and the idea made her mouth dry. Skewering pasta and broccoli onto her fork and lifting it to her mouth, she hoped the sauce would help. It was hard to breathe and eat at the same time.
An expectant silence fell over the table while Kendra ate. Chelsea mouthed the words, ‘slow down’ across the table and Elaine got the message.
With a sly wink, Elaine asked, “Does anyone want a drink?”
“The boys left a few beers in the fridge. A six-pack, I think. I’ll have one,” said Chelsea, as Elaine got to her feet.
“Me too,” said Kendra.
“Not till after your punishment,” Chelsea retorted. Elaine smiled and shook her head as she opened the three brown bottles and placed them on the table. Chelsea grabbed hers and after she sat again, so did Elaine.
“Oh, that’s just torture,” Kendra complained, shaking her head and finishing her pasta a little quicker. She swallowed down her last mouthful and sat back in the chair, wiping her chin. When she was done, she announced, “Okay. Let’s get this over with.”
Elaine and Chelsea couldn’t help but laugh nervously. Kendra pushed back her chair, stood and promptly pulled up the hem of her miniskirt with both hands, framing her shaved pussy perfectly. Elaine stared. She glanced at Chelsea but she was also looking. Elaine saw Chelsea glance up at Kendra and she did the same. Kendra was just looking down on them both, smiling!
She isn’t bothered by this at all! Maybe it’s a fantasy or something…
Elaine fought to keep control over her breathing. Wide-eyed, she looked at Chelsea again and they exchanged glances and giggled some more.
Kendra’s pussy was quite pretty, though her inner lips protruded a little in comparison to Elaine’s. Her hooded soldier barely peeked out at all, and it certainly wasn’t as hard as Elaine’s was right at that moment. She looked dry and Elaine swallowed when she realised her own pussy was the exact opposite.
God, I could never do this, Elaine thought, a new wave of heat enveloping her cheeks. I’d just die! And I’d be soaked! Just from the humiliation! “That’s enough!” Elaine gasped, surprised at how vehement she sounded. She’d almost shouted!
“God, about time,” said Chelsea, smirking at Elaine. “I thought you’d never stop her. I mean, she’s got a pretty pussy, but jeez Elaine. I would have stopped her in five seconds, but you took way longer.”
“Huh? What?” Elaine asked, feeling suddenly cornered.
Kendra had fixed her skirt and was leaning on the back of her chair, looking perplexed.
“I mean,” continued Chelsea. “I was waiting for you to call a halt. But I guess you liked the look of her cunt.” The way Chelsea had said it almost sent a shudder through Elaine.
Thinking remarkably quickly, Elaine countered, “But I thought you were going to say when her punishment was up.”
“I said either of us, and you know it.”
Elaine knew she was right. It was just like Chelsea to pull something like this. So, resorting to the lowest denominator, eloquently Elaine said, “You’re full of shit, Chelsea.”
Picking up her plate, she grabbed Kendra’s and took them both to the sink, drawing water to wash up. She heard both girls giggle behind her back, but she didn’t hear much else after that. Before long Chelsea added her empty plate to the pile and all was quiet save for the tinkle of cutlery as it was washed. The television came on in the other room and Elaine was left to her thoughts.
I am SO moving out at the end of this lease. I need to be around people I can talk to. No games. No bullshit. Just plain honesty. It would be nice to live with friends. Mentally ticking each of them off, she reconsidered. Maybe not. Most of her friends lived in disaster areas as it was. Their rooms could be rated as toxic waste dumps. She smiled and shook her head. Maybe I could find a loft.
When the dishes were done, Elaine headed for her room and prepared to shower. Glancing at her silent computer, she winced. Her term paper needed work, but at that moment, she didn’t feel like it. She wanted to go to the chat room and hopefully talk to Gary and restore some sanity to her headspace. He mightn’t be there anyway. She sighed. I probably shouldn’t go either. I don’t want to scare him off… But, if he’s there, won’t it be because he wants to talk to me?
She wished she knew.
By the time she’d finished showering, she’d talked herself into ignoring her roommates. At least for a day. She had to send a message somehow, and nothing else seemed to work.
Then she had a terrible thought. She didn’t want to get in trouble and say the wrong thing, or they could do to her what Chelsea did to Kendra! Just about anything could be construed as ‘the wrong thing’. Swallowing her pride, and before she changed her mind, she walked down the hall and stood leaning in the lounge room doorway, waiting for the ads. Thankfully CSI was on and the others were engrossed, so when Elaine said goodnight, telling them she was going to play online for a bit then crash, they hardly acknowledged her.
Thank God, she thought, switching on the computer, grateful for the respite. Changing into her nightie, she was glad she had one to wear.
MasterServant was there. acquiescent was also there, as was someone whose name was capitalised, so Elaine assumed he was a Dominant. He called himself Clockwork. She knew he was a ‘he’, because she checked his profile. As she suspected, he claimed he was a Dom, so Elaine chose to be polite until she felt otherwise.
“Hello MasterServant, hello Clockwork,” she typed. “Hugs acquiescent, it’s good to see you.”
“Greetings kurious,” Gary typed, adding a smile.
“Hello kurious. Nice to meet you,” typed Clockwork.
“Hi sis,” acquiescent sent, greeting her warmly. “I’m just in the middle of something here, I’ll join you in a bit.” She then left for the ‘Be Right Back’ room. Elaine was suddenly alone with two Doms, and she wasn’t sure how to feel about that. She wished Gary would message her privately, and he did.
“I was hoping you’d come.”
Elaine wasn’t sure what to say. She wasn’t sure what he’d want to hear! “Um,” she typed finally. “I should be working on a paper I have to do. But my mind isn’t on it.” She was pleased she hadn’t lied.
“I’m glad on the one hand. I wouldn’t want your paper to be late on the other.”
In the room Clockwork gave his farewell and said he was having an early night. Both Elaine and Gary told him to ‘Be well’, and bid him good night. Then they were alone.
“It won’t be late. I’m still well ahead of schedule,” Elaine sent, referring to her paper.
“I hope it stays that way,” he typed in return.
It sounded just a little like an order, so playfully, Elaine typed, “Yes, Sir.”
A moment later came back the message, “I smile when you call me, ‘Sir’.”
Elaine felt herself start to blush all over again, only this time it was like a warm blanket. “I like making you smile,” she typed, surprising herself with her own honesty.
“Elaine,” he typed.
“Yes, Sir?” She smiled at her words.
“Can we add each other to Messenger so we don’t have to meet here?”
For a moment Elaine wondered why. Then she wondered why she was wondering. “Of course.”
“Sometimes I’d like to talk to you without any distractions.”
“Okay.” Elaine’s hands were shaking a little. “Do you mean now?”
“Yes, why not.”
“Will Simone mind?”
“I doubt it. I think her Dom is expected home at any minute. She’s making dinner.”
“Isn’t it a bit late for that?”
“I think she’s on the west coast somewhere.”
“Oh,” Elaine said, reminding herself that Gary knew she was in his time zone. She hoped she wasn’t making a mistake. They left messages in the chat room for Simone to read when she returned.
Within minutes they had added each other to their list of chat partners and were chatting privately on Messenger. Gary was right. There were no distractions and she could almost hear his voice as she read his words. It was far more intimate. And her body was reacting as she’d come to expect. In fact, she realised, it seemed to be getting more intense, and happening more quickly each time she saw him. Or was it just seeing Kendra’s pussy earlier? She’d been hot then, admittedly for reasons she wasn’t certain about. She might have just been embarrassed. Shaking her head, she tried to concentrate, subconsciously squeezing her thighs together, doing little to quench the embers glowing within.
“Are you usually home around nine P.M.?” he asked.
“Yes, unless I’m going out. Which is rare.”
“I’ll make you a deal. We can meet here on Messenger at nine P.M. any night you wish, so long as I am able to be here. If I’m not here between five to and five past, then ‘I can’t make it’ and you shouldn’t expect me. You may do the same.”
If she were talking, Elaine would have stuttered. “Thank you, Sir,” she typed.
“You can call me Gary, if you prefer.”
“It doesn’t feel right. Not yet,” Elaine replied. “I don’t know why.”
“Probably because you feel it.”
“I’m sorry, I’m not following.”
“I think you will, if I’m not wrong.” For a moment they sat staring impassively at their respective screens. That’s what Elaine assumed. She didn’t get the feeling he’d left or was talking to someone else. In moments, another message came. “Just relax and feel it come over you,” he encouraged. “Close your eyes and picture yourself with me in your mind.”
Elaine did as he asked. She saw herself quite clearly, kneeling quietly. The room was intimately lit with candles or low lighting, she wasn’t sure. She was facing him, looking up at him. But somehow her head was inclined slightly downward. Like she was looking at him through her lashes.
“What do you see?”
“I’m kneeling.”
“How are you kneeling?”
“I’m relaxed. Like it’s an everyday scene.”
“Tell me how you feel.”
“Content. Unhurried.” There was something else too, something she couldn’t put her finger on.
“Describe what your hands are doing.”
“My hands are lightly in my lap,” typed Elaine, seeing the image in her mind. “Crossed on top of each other, open and facing upwards. Like one is cradling the other.”
“Is your back straight?”
“Yes. I always sit up straight. Um, I’m not very tall,” Elaine hoped he didn’t mind. She blushed at the thought of minding. “But I’m not straining. I’m very relaxed. I feel… wonderful.”
“Are you looking at me?”
“Yes. You’re smiling at me now and again. You’re reading.”
“Is there music?”
“Yes, but it’s not loud. It’s in the background.”
“I am your focus.”
“Yes.”
“Do you know what ‘subspace’ is?”
“No, Sir.”
“Subspace is the place you go in your mind when you touch the essence of your submissive nature.”
Elaine gulped as the words sunk in. That was how she felt. That was what she was feeling! “Yes. I understand.”
“Let it wash over you. Let yourself be.”
“May I turn off my bedroom light?” Elaine had no idea why she asked him if she could.
“You may.”
It was only a step away. “Thank you.”
Gary sent a smile. It made Elaine’s heart soar and in her mind she could almost see it. “I wish I could see your eyes,” she typed.
“I have a picture if you’d like.”
She hesitated to respond. That wasn’t what she meant. This was an escalation. “I just meant…”
What did she mean?
Gary sensed her uncertainty. “It’s not a swap. I won’t demand one from you. In fact, I won’t ask for one. You will have to offer it to me. And if you do, know I will accept it with relish.”
Elaine wanted to see his eyes. She wanted to see them badly. Before she could type another word, the option to accept a file popped up on her screen. She reached for her mouse, the cursor hovering above the ‘download file’ button.
He typed, “I’m whispering… Accept or not, little one.”
Elaine clicked the button, swallowing and feeling her body tingle as waves of emotion washed across her skin, taking her breath away. She hoped she’d done the right thing. She couldn’t help herself. She needed to know. It might smash her fantasies into a thousand pieces, but she had to know. She had one last chance. ‘Open file?’ was the option. She could always delete it. She didn’t have to look.
She opened it. In a flash his picture was on her screen.
Her heart stopped.
She couldn’t breathe.
And she couldn’t tear her eyes away.
It was a close up. Brown eyes. Dark brown. Almost black like her own. Deep and mysterious. Lines at their corners. Not deep. His face was timeless. She glanced at his mouth. Her heart skipped a beat. He was smiling! His lips were full, light pink on his tanned skin. The corners of his mouth turned upward playfully. Elaine licked her lips subconsciously. It looked like an afternoon picture. Unfocussed dark green shadows played in the background. His skin glowed golden in the early evening sun. Sweat trickled down one side of his face. He’d been working.
In her mind, Elaine saw him wipe his brow with his forearm just before the photo was taken. Never before had she seen a more erotic photograph of a man after a hard days work. His eyes pierced hers. They drew her in. His strong jaw was speckled with dirt and a day’s growth. But still his eyes distracted her.
His hair was dark and glossy. Unkempt and wild. Wavy. Sweat dripped from places where a few strands were stuck together, pointed and curved, framing his face. Framing his eyes. Elaine didn’t realise she was smiling. Seconds passed as she lost herself.
And found herself.
“Okay?” flashed on her screen.
Elaine blinked. Where had she been? How long had she been staring? “Yes. Sorry.”
“That’s not very enthusiastic. I’m disappointed.” He sent a smile with its tongue poking out.
Elaine felt like she hadn’t taken a breath in minutes. Her hands hesitated over the keyboard as she tried to put her thoughts into words. This was a man. Not a boy. A real man, with hands that could…
“You are beautiful,” she typed. She almost shit herself.
Did I mean that?
Yes!
He typed back, “Thank you. I’m flattered.”
In the picture, his eyes were so distracting they drew her from the conversation.
“Are you still there?” he asked.
She minimised the photo. She would look at it later. Before bed! “Yes, I’m sorry again.”
“Please let me know if you are away from your keys.”
“I will, Sir. But I was right here.”
“What were you doing?”
“Staring.”
A moment of silence passed. He sent a smile. Then, “I hope that fills in the blanks.”
“Oh, yeah.”
“You’re going to make me blush.”
“Oh, stop it,” Elaine said, giggling out loud. Her face was starting to hurt from smiling so long.
“Yeah, I was kidding.” He sent a wink.
Elaine bit her lip. She had a similar photo on her computer. Well, not exactly, but it was clear and had lots of personality. Her mother thought it was horrible, probably because she and a girlfriend were hugging cheek-to-cheek, poking their tongues at the camera. It was a provocative picture, taken last winter when she went home for a week.
“I’d like to send you mine,” Elaine typed, escalating their relationship beyond the rational. What am I doing? She couldn’t stop herself. She hoped he would like her.
She hoped he would approve.
“Are you sure?”
She was looking at the ‘Actions’ tab, figuring out how to send it. “No. But I have to. I need to know.”
“I’m sure you are beautiful. Don’t be afraid.”
“I’ll try.”
“Okay.”
She bit her lip. “Um, I’m on the left.” All of a sudden her pussy contracted gently and she felt herself wetting her chair. She stood up rapidly. “One moment please,” she typed.
“Sure.”
She grabbed a towel and folded it a couple of times, laying it over her chair and resuming her seat. She was glad it was dry but knew it wasn’t going to stay that way. Opening the ‘Actions’ tab again, she selected ‘Send a File’ and found the photograph.
In moments the deed was done. She’d crossed a line she had no intention of crossing. How many lines will I cross like this? As the seconds passed, she waited for his reaction. She craved it.
She needed it.
At last it came. “Never lie to me again.”
Her jaw dropped. Tears filled her eyes unbidden. What had she done? She was about to sob!
What is happening to me?
“Never say you are not beautiful. Never again. Promise me.”
She sobbed anyway. She couldn’t help it. Tears streaked her cheeks and her body flushed with anguished pleasure, shuddering in a miasma of conflicting emotions.
“I…” she began, almost unable to see the letters she was typing. “I promise.”
Chapter 08
“And I mean it,” said Gary. “I don’t want to hear any more self-deprecating remarks, okay? Things like, ‘I can’t do it, ‘ or ‘I’m not good enough, ‘ or ‘I’m not pretty.’ They’re all out, got it?”
Elaine blinked. “Yes, Sir,” she typed back quickly. She waited for him to respond, sensing he was gathering his thoughts. It gave her a moment to make a decision. She’d walk taller after tonight. She almost giggled as she wiped her eyes and blew her nose. She tried to relax while she waited.
He used silence very effectively.
“I have passionate convictions.”
Elaine felt her head nodding. “Yes, Sir.”
“I understand the vanilla ways in which you think. By that, I mean the ways you have been taught all your life to respond to situations and questions. Saying you are not beautiful when you clearly are, is considered to be ‘humble’ in the vanilla world. It’s a valued thing. So I know you weren’t intentionally lying. I understand that.”
“Yes, Sir.” Elaine took a deep breath. “Thank you.”
“It’s all right. You have a good heart, Elaine. Until I’m proved wrong, if anyone asks, I’ll tell them you are beautiful inside and out. So you better get used to it.”
“You’re good for my ego.”