Best Friend’s Sister

Best Friend’s Sister 3

Getting Down to Brass Tacks

I found it amazing, startling, almost surreal to be sitting here with my “little sister” wrapped up in my arms. I’d known Wanda since she entered first grade. She was simply part of my life. Within me a candle burned that represented the unique place she held in my life. For years she was just John’s little sister, always tagging along, always part of everything he and I did. I assume when I was five I didn’t give it a thought. If she disappeared from my life now, it would leave a gaping hole. A little sister in some ways but that was starting to change.

Fairly recently it hit me: out of all the women who had moved in and out of my life, she was always there. The one woman that I’d spent the most time with, the one constant in my life. The question might be whether it would always remain like that or would “fate” reach in and give my life a shake?

Anyone else, I wouldn’t have entertained these particular thoughts: Was I good for her or not? Was her life better due to my presence? I already didn’t have a good opinion of myself, so these thoughts were just part of the curse I lived with–an overanalytical guy that thought entirely too much. I know my fervent wish was to be a happy-go-lucky kinda guy but I gave up that dream long ago. I not sure I’d recognize “happy” if it showed up in pink tights. If a butterfly landed on my nose, it was more likely that I’d obsess over it for half an hour rather than appreciate it for the miracle it was. Same thing with being happy. I had so little experience with it, I doubt I’d recognize it at all. At this moment I was in the middle of being exposed to something that could lead me to happiness. Would I recognize it for that it was or would it pass me by?

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

“What’s in this campus center of yours? I hope it’s like ours–a gift shop, a grill to cook up greasy good, and beer on tap.” I said with a yawn.

“Yeah, that’s the place. It’s pretty nice. They have sandwiches, chips, a grill for burgers, and even better, beer on tap. It’s a great place to hang out and get drunk. Plus you’re still on campus. If you get someone to stay sober, you can get wasted, then you have someone to point you in the right direction when it’s time to go home.”

“That sounds like something you’ve done before. Sounds like some good stories there. I have a lot of those. We have a place just like it. Hey, Laura showed up this year. We’ve gone to the pub a few times and shared some pitchers of beer. Who woulda thunk it?” We stood up so we could stretch it out, after hours of sitting. I held out my hand, she put hers in mine, and we headed off down the sidewalk. “Let’s go. My treat.”

“I have a meal plan, so that’ll take care of the food. Can you get the beer?”

“Sure thing.” We made it to the door and went into the building.

“So, you and Laura went drinking together? Mmm. That’s sound interesting. Any sparks flying? Any drunken groping in your room? Clothes flying left and right? Windows fogging up. Bite marks all over you? Pass the friend stage, did we?”

“No, Wanda! What a pain. Don’t toss your fantasies into my story. We’re as far apart as any two friends can be. We had less time together than you and I did. If we did hang out, it was usually at church. Until you said that, I never had a dirty thought about her. Thanks for opening up that door.”

“Uh huh. I doubt you’d tell me anyway. . . . Hello? Anybody home?” As she snapped her fingers in front of my face.

I put my hand over her face, which she pushed away. “What a . . .” “Shhhh.” I withdrew inside for a little bit, focused on some thought that wanted to be heard. “Do you know . . .” I was pulling in the threads of this ‘thought’ that had risen up and grabbed my attention. “I just had this thought, maybe because we were talking about Laura. In my whole life, the one woman I’ve spent the most time with has been you.”

“Okay. What’s your point?” With that she poked me.

“Not a thing. Not yet. It just came to me. It’s a new thought. Give me a few days to overanalyze it.” Of course, with my overactive mind, it gave me a brief glimpse of my life without her in it. My stomach did a flip and my eyes opened wide.

“What? You went all pale for a second.”

“Nothing.” I turned to her and put my hands on her face. I leaned down to kiss her lips gently while looking in her eyes.

“What was that about? I’d like another but that came out of nowhere.”

I put my forehead on hers and closed my eyes. “My life is . . so much better for having you in it. I just wanted you to know that, sister of mine.”

“Mmm. Sister, huh? That doesn’t even come close to answering my question. I’m gonna have to call Debbie and ask her if your kisses make her tremble, too.”

“Please don’t.” I opened my eyes and looked in her face. “I’ll try to tell you somehow, sometime. There’s no way I could explain it right now.” I wrapped her up in my arms and gave her a hug.

“Alright. Whatever it was, it didn’t amuse you.”

“No, not bit. The price of having an overactive mind. But since I got here, I have a totally new appreciation of having you in my life.”

She had a little bit of a frown and a lot of curiosity. “You’re right. I could say the same thing. We haven’t kicked you out yet, so I guess we’ll keep you.”

“Thank you for your overwhelming generosity. It wasn’t that bad sleeping in the basement, in case you were wondering.”

“Man, how ungracious. We left the door unlocked. What more could you ask for?”

“Smartass. You could’ve left your door unlocked.” I said with a wink.

“You were horny when you were five. I was trying to saving myself.”

“You had to get a deadbolt?” She shook her head, then retreated into my hug with a smile on her face. “I figured if you could get past the deadbolt, I’d reward you.” I shook my head. “All this time. If I’d only known.”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

We roamed through the Campus Center, then down the stairs to the entrance to The Grill as it was called. How original. We pushed through the doors and went in search of beer and greasy food. We grabbed some trays and spent some time looking at the menu on the wall. We slid the trays down the counter and made our first requests for something from the grill.

“Did you ever get to go drinking with your bother?”

“Nope. My parent don’t drink, so it was never part of our lives.”

“I can understand that. My parents had a glass once in a while but it was rare. Needless to say when my brother and I got old enough, we really overdid it. My first beer was at a lacrosse party and then they let me have all I wanted. I remember my parents waiting on the porch when we got home, watching me weave up the sidewalk. But that’s all I can remember.”

“You’d think a church camp would be a nice place to work. But on weekends we were some drinking fools, your brother included.”

“Really. My brother? I don’t believe you.”

“Why? Why do think he never drank?”

“He was Daddy’s favorite, destined to become a man of the cloth. I can’t picture him drinking, let alone getting drunk.”

I let out a titter of laughter, finding it funny and disturbing at the same time. “I guess I have no clue what it was like to grow up your house after all. John was going to be a minister and you were going to be . . what?”

“They were steering me toward becoming a teacher. But I dug my heals in when I finally decided which college I wanted to go to. I wanted to major in restaurant management, not teaching. They were okay with that but I could tell they weren’t pleased. They also wanted me to go Jefferson College and live at home. So here I am three hours away in the State of Virginia. Thank god.”

“I had no idea. My house was . . my house. What can I say? When I walked in your door it was like a breath of rash air. That feeling of pressure just washed away and seeing you and your brother always lifted my spirits. How oblivious I was. I’m sorry.”

“Why?”

“I treated you and your home like it was vacation every time I was there, when in fact it wasn’t. It makes me feel I didn’t have your back, when that’s what I thought I’d been doing all along. I don’t know what I could’ve done to help but it makes me feel like I was self-centered the whole time.”

“Don’t do that. I knew you had my back. You were there each and every time I needed you. You were always welcome in our house and each time to visited, you stirred it up. I think there must’ve been some point where Daddy realized he couldn’t suppress your energy, your sense of humor, and how good you felt whenever you came to visit. You were our breath of fresh air. I’m glad you’re here now and I feel very lucky to have you in my life. So, if you remember anything, remember that.”

“You’re a smart cookie, you know that?”

“Yes, I am.” She said with a smile. “So, what kind of cookie do you like to nibble on?”

My mouth opened up but no noise came out.

“Oh, look at your face. It’s not often you’re at a loss for words. Never crossed your mind, did it? Not yet, maybe, mmm?”

Oxygen. Needed oxygen in the brain. And a moment to gather my thoughts. “Wanda.” Mmm mm? I let my hand rest on her stomach and ran the backs of my fingers lightly across her belly, left to right. She clamped down on my hand and held it there.

“Once again, you are so wrong. It sounds more like you didn’t notice me, cause I do remember keeping an eye on you, whether to watch your back or some other part.” I said with a smirk. “I guess I must’ve been too good at it, if you thought I never noticed you. Cause cross my heart, I did.”

“It doesn’t matter if I noticed you and you noticed me. I felt you had my back wherever you were in school, that’s all I needed to know. It does sound like you spent a little more time checking out my butt than I did yours. Is that right?”

“Don’t know what you’re talking about, sister of mine.”

“So, that’s what you’re going to say every time we approach a sensitive topic.” Jabbing me in the ribs.

“Does it feel good when you do that, cause I can’t say it’s top of my list for how your fingers touch me.” As trapped her fingers, removed them from my ribs, and gave them back to her. As far as your brother drinking, I guess we put alot of effort into pouring beer down his throat, now that I think about it. I hope we didn’t turn him into an alcoholic. Still, do you want to hear about it?”

“Really? Sure. Anything that proves he knows how to relax.”

“It was late July one summer. Right about the time you guys head down to SC. Since he was about to leave, we gave him a going away party. A tub of ice filled with beer, chips and pretzels and cinnamon poptarts, of course, and four or five guys working on getting stupid drunk.”

“I slipped up, though. My girlfriend was heading out with her friends to go shopping or something, so I went down to give her a kiss goodbye. It took five minutes until I got back to the party. Five minutes too long. There was your brother on the floor of the Dining Hall in a puddle of throw up. He couldn’t get up and he apologized over and over. ‘Davie, I’m so sorry.’ ”

“My brother was sitting at the table in a stupor but enjoying the whole thing. He probably handed him that last beer, knowing him. I was the least drunk guy there, so it fell on me. I would’ve gotten him up but he couldn’t sit on the floor, let alone a chair. So I nudged him over to the wall and left him propped up there. I had to takes his shoes and his pants off, he was such a mess. I got a bucket of warm water and a washcloth and cleaned him off. All the while he was still apologizing, “Davie, I’m so sorry.” “I know, John. Relax, you’re fine. Do you know how many times you’ve done this for me? That’s why I’m here.” I headed into the kitchen and got a bucket of water and a mop and cleaned up the dining room. Was I grossed out? Nah. I’d been there too many times myself. We had the maintenance truck out back and we poured him into it. Then we took him back to staff house, dragged him up the stairs, and tossed him in his bed. What a night.”

“I’ve never been that drunk. I wish you’d taken some pictures. Those would’ve been some good blackmail photos.”

“How a heartless. Someone took a photo last year that shows me on the floor of the bathroom, passed out with my face on the toilet seat. I’ll try to find you a copy and send it to you. Hugs and kisses from the third stall. Love, David.”

“I look forward to that.”

“We never got to go drinking much, did we?”

“I don’t think we did.” We moved up the serving line to grab our food. “I think Lisa and I showed up once, after we’d been drinking wine coolers all night.”

“Oh, yeah. I remember that night. Lisa’s a different person when she’s been drinking. She made me feel like an appetizer. I thought she was going to hump my leg.”

“Oh, yeah. She wanted you even more than I did. She was ready to drag you off.”

“Better her than some guy. Last year some guy checked me out. For the first time in my life I felt like someone could see through my clothes. It was the worst feeling I’ve ever had.”

“Now you know how we feel when some guy hits on us and won’t take no for an answer. I hate it.”

“I’m sure and I know you’re right. Guys are never held accountable, are they? I know it’s unfair and I’m sorry. You deserve better than that.”

“No, there don’t seem to be many good guys out there. So if I say you’re one of the good guys, just nod your head and agree with me.” With that she put a kiss on my cheek. I nodded my head up and down.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

We waited for the food still frying and I decided to stay with her until it was ready. “Well, I hope when you’re in love, it’s different. It’s got to be. If someone loves you, shouldn’t you be able to see it in their eyes? Like I would know. I recognize anger, irritation, and fury when I see it in some girl’s eyes, usually because I put them there. For the last two years I thought I was in love but I guess I was wrong the whole time. Let’s not even talk about lust. That’s pretty straight forward. If I’ve learned anything, it’s totally different for a guy than it is for girl. And I know what happens when ‘horny’ kicks in.”

“I bet you do. Well, I certainly hope it’s like that, if I ever fall in love.” She said a little mournfully.

“When.” She looked up with a question in her eyes. “WHEN you fall in love.”

I gave her a little kiss on the cheek, just like when we kissed under the mistletoe. I’m not sure why. She put her hand on my chest, just for us to . . . keep in contact. New territory. Maybe we’d been kept apart all these years and now in one afternoon we had a chance to show how much we cared. “You’re entirely too beautiful. I don’t know if you believe me but it’s true. It’s going to attract alotta guys–good ones and bad ones. Take your time and wait for the right one, no assholes, please, play hard to get, no over-the-top slutty behavior, and make sure he’s who he says he is. Check the label. Then call me so I can come pass judgment . . . WHEN you finally fall in love. But I reserve the right to haul off and kick his ass if you’re so blinded by love that you don’t realize he’s a butthead.”

“No wonder you’re conflicted. You count our kisses and then you talk about my future boyfriends. I’d be conflicted, too. Can’t you just stay on one thought?”

“Only one? Is that what it’s like for the rest of the world? Only one thought, not two or three or five?”

“It is for me. How many thoughts do you juggle in there?”

“It’s like reading four or five books at the same time. One stays in the bedroom, another in the living room, the kitchen, even the bathroom. I don’t what I would do if I had only one train of thought in my head. I think the silence would be deafening.”

I’m sure we never had a conversation even close to this one. What’s that saying? ‘Familiarity breeds contempt.’ I couldn’t be any other way than what I was, which was borderline spastic. She shook her head. “Okay. Thanks, Dad. Thank you for always looking out for me.”

“Your welcome. That’s what Dads do.”

The food was arriving and we were filling up trays to take back to a table.

“To being conflicted? Yeah, that’s me. All I know is that tonight or tomorrow I have to head back to school and leave you here. That’s going to be toughest part. Leaving you here alone. Odds are you’re going to meet some great guy that’s good enough for you and you’re going to fall head over heels in love. It feels inevitable, likes there’s no way to avoid it.”

“Well, college hasn’t lived up to my expectations so far and falling in love isn’t exactly at the top my list of priorities. It sounds like you expect it to happen more than I do. I like a bit of romance and want to meet some guy someday that puts me first, not second, third, or fourth, and so on. It’s left a bad taste in my mouth.”

“I understand. Having a girlfriend for the last two years didn’t leave me free to look for love or a shallow hookup or drunken frat orgies. Sorry. Looks like I don’t have a high opinion of finding love at a college level after all. I guess I was actually lucky to be occupied, as opposed to being free to sow my wild oats, as they say.”

“That’s a good way to look at it. It means I don’t have look at you like you lost your halo and worry that you’re like every guy I’ve met. It just makes me appreciate you more.” She put her hand back on my chest but I’m not sure it was even a conscious thought. I know I liked it.

I put my fingers up to my temples. “Is it straight?”

“Is what straight?”

“My halo? I don’t have a mirror. Is it straight?” I said with a cheeky grin.

I loved her frown. She actually reached up and pinched my nipple, which made me jump. My nipple! And there wasn’t anything erotic about it. It hurt. “Ow!” I rubbed it to get the sting out of it. “Do you ever turn that sense of humor off?”

“I try, I swear I try. I’ll tone it down and focus on what’s important.”

“And what’s that?”

“You. Just you. And I’ll try to use the time wisely until I have to go. I know it’ll be hard to get in that car and leave.”

“Whenever you leave, I always miss you, here or at home.” She put a hand on my arm and leaned up to put a kiss on my cheek, just like at Christmas. “This is the first time we’ve had this much time together, so let’s it enjoy until you have to go. You’ll be okay. Then we’ll work on our homework over Christmas break, okay?”

“Uhhhh. Do I have to?” With a little whine in my voice, trying to sound like it was a deplorable task but failing miserably. There was no way I could say that without my smile leaking through.

“You miserable guy. You’ll survive somehow. I’m sure it won’t be that difficult.”

“No, Wanda.” Looking down into her face. I put a hand on her cheek and let my thumb give her a kiss. “No, I’m sure it won’t be difficult at all.”

“Practice, practice, practice. That’s what they say.” I’m sure the sparkle in her eyes matched the one in mine.

“Only . . . 51 days and nine hours.”

“Really? How do you know that?”

“Another one of my superpowers. Not that I was counting the days or anything. . . . Plus there’s a calendar on that wall back there.”

“You just saw the calendar on the wall and knew you might need to know how many days it was until Christmas break?”

“No, Wanda. I saw the calendar and I counted the days. Then I said to myself, ‘God, that’s gonna take forever.’ I wasn’t going to bring it up at all until you twisted my arm.”

“It must be hard being you. Never a dull moment when you’re around, is there?”

“You have no idea.”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

We reached the end of the counter to wait for the last of the food. I took the heavier tray with me. “I’ll go get the beer and find a table. And the napkins and ketchup and stuff.” Wanda nodded, patted me on the chest, and let me go. She stayed for the last part of the order and I headed over for the beer. I ordered a pitcher of Budweiser, grabbed a bunch of Solo cups, and went to find a table.

I sat down and waited for her until she had everything. Along the way she bumped into a friend who came over to join us. Not just a friend but her roommate. “David, this is Cassie. She’s one of my roommates. You know, the one I was telling you about?” Wanda, smooth as can be, said, “Cassie. This is David. He’s my boyfriend from home. He’s a sophomore at Tech.” I was in the middle of drinking my beer, so her timing was impeccable. I almost choked on the sip I was in the middle of. At least the cup helped me cover up and time to think about it. Roll with it or admit the truth?

I’m not an accomplished liar, but I love trying to see how long I can sound sincere about something that’s a total fabrication. I still couldn’t believe Dad spent seven years lying to our faces. The acting skill, his mastery at lying. It was detestable and impressive at the same time but yeah, mostly detestable. This was for a good cause, so I’d run with it.

“Hey, Cassie. It’s good to meet you. I’ve only been here a couple hours and already I’ve heard all about you.”

Her eyebrows lifted at that but she didn’t look like someone that shied away from a challenge. She came across as brassy. Pretty but brassy.

Cassie looked me and up down. “Really? Are you telling the truth? Are you sure you just didn’t pick him up at the library? You spend all your time over there anyway.”

“Cassie. You’re a pain in the ass.” Wanda spit out, with more humor than spite. She turned to me, “Cassie’s a terrible influence. Avoid her if you can.”

“We don’t look like boyfriend–girlfriend? Why not?”

“You’re not all lovey-dovey, can’t keep your hands off each other. Nope, I don’t see it.”

“I’ve known Wanda since first grade, so maybe we’re just so comfortable with each other that we don’t act like we’re in heat anymore. Just like an old married couple.”

“Mmm mmph. Sure. An old married couple. You look more like a brother and sister than two people that’ve swapped spit in the backseat of the car:”

Oh, I had to laugh at that, since I was thinking that just this morning.

“Why is that so funny?” From Wanda as she nudged me.

“I was thinking that on the way over here. I was regretting the fact that we never had a chance to go parking or find a reason to get in the back seat for some ‘heated’ conversation.”

“You knew where I lived. Your own fault. That’s what you get.”

“Well, there you go. How convenient that instead of walking the whole way here, I brought my car with me. How about we go check it out after we’re done eating?”

“I think you need to eat your food and drink your beer and take care of that hunger first.”

“Alright. I guess you’re right.” We consumed our burgers and, nibbled at the fries, and like the champion beer guzzler I am, I think I drank two beers for every one of theirs. Not enough to get sloppy drunk but enough to lose some of those inhibitions.

“Well, Cassie. All I know is that when I’m with Wanda everything else just fades away.” Wanda was sitting near, close enough to have her hand on my arm. “Hey.” She leaned in, no doubt thinking I had something to whisper. Instead when she was close, I gently placed a kiss on her neck, followed by a wet one on her earlobe. She let out a little gasp and looked at me and I’m sure I had the biggest twinkle in my eye.

Cassie on the other hand was watching us like hawk. “Okay, Impress me. Prove it.”

“Come on, girlfriend. Let’s show her.” Wanda sent a glance toward Cassie and then one toward me. What was more important? Prove Cassie wrong, that we were in fact boyfriend and girlfriend? Or give David the chance to practice the mischief he’s so good at? Tough choice, tough choice. She hesitated but she really wanted to get Cassie off her back.

She leaned in eyes wide. I let my let my hands go up and rest on her cheeks, then let my thumbs caress the high part of her face. “Come on, close your eyes.” She did but I could see her eyes were moving from the suspense. I followed this up with the most sensual, loving kiss I could give her. I looked at her beautiful face. Now I whispered. “That was a little slice of heaven.” That certainly wasn’t a butterfly kiss. “Ten? Eleven?”

She pulled back, breathed out a bit and opened her eyes. “I thought we were here to get something to eat?”

“Sorry. I wanted a little taste of dessert before we ate.”

Cassie let out a breath. “Well. That certainly was sexy.”

“Yes, it was. We need to make sure we have enough time for more of those.”

I can’t even tell you what the look on Wanda’s face was. Conflicted? Good. Tit-for-tat. Welcome to my world.

At this point I didn’t know whose chain I was pulling–Cassie’s, Wanda’s, or mine. I knew I wanted another one of those kisses. Maybe two or three but closer to fifty. “Come one. Let’s eat. We still have to finish off the beer.”

Wanda turned to me, “Cassie’s being trying to get me laid since I got here. It’s like I’ve got my own pimp. But thank god she looks out for me.” I could see she was still unsure about what she’d started. And what she’d have to do to keep the fiction going. She knows I’ve got a terrible sense of humor and the alcohol wasn’t helping. I took her hand in mine and slipped our fingers together.

I turned to Cassie, “So, she never mentioned me?”

“Nope. Never. I’m not sure I believe it’s true now.” She had a devilish look in her eye, like she didn’t care if it was true or not, just trying to stir the pot.

Wanda butted in. “Cassie. Can you just leave it alone.”

Oh, but it was my turn. “So, Cassie. Why is it so important to corrupt Wanda? I like her fine just the way she is.” I still had her hand in mine and they were snuggly on the bench.

Wanda squeezed my hand to get my attention and I looked at her. There wasn’t as much amusement in her eyes. This was some sort of issue between them, something that probably ended with an argument. I tried to remind myself that adding alcohol to my sense of humor usually got me in trouble. I leaned in and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. “I’m sorry. Too much alcohol is always a bad thing for me. I’ll try to behave.” I squeezed her hand and tried to tone it down.

This only took a moment, in time to return to the conversation I had started. Cassie said, “I’m not trying to corrupt Wanda. I’m just trying to get her to come out of her shell. She fights it every time I try.”

“Cassie started drinking when she was three and lost her virginity at five. She thinks I need to catch up with her.” Wanda chimed in.

“That is so not true!” Cassie said trying to defend herself.

“Which part?” I asked. “So where are you from?”

“I grew up in Baltimore. Best place to grow up.”

“I bet you grew up quick in Baltimore,” which was my guess.

“Yeah, I don’t think I had much of a choice. But I turned out alright.” She claimed.

“That’s open to debate.” said Wanda.

“You know what I think?” I looked at Wanda but I was talking to Cassie. “I think that when everyone heads off to college, it gives them a chance to . . . remake themselves. To become a different person than they were high school. Me, I just wanted to get away from my family. They drive me crazy. Wanda, her parents pretty much decided who she was, who she could hand out with, especially who she could date.” I cast an eye at Wanda. “I bet coming here was pretty liberating, wasn’t it? Like you could spread your wings”

“It did when I got here but now not so much.”

“Yeah, I don’t doubt that.” I turned back to Cassie. “I think Wanda’s beautiful. And I bet the guys here thinks she’s beautiful, too. If one guy asked you introduce him, I bet ten did. You might like that kind of attention; it doesn’t necessarily mean she does. And if you have some dream about starting your own club of the most Beautiful Co-eds, you need to accept that they’re not all going to think the way you do. I remember those girls in high school. They were unattainable, princesses, bitches, too. They knew they were beautiful, too. I never had the nerve to talk to them. They would’ve chewed me up and spit me out.”

“And not every beautiful girl is ready to just give it up. It’s a shame that you can beautiful, inside and out” giving Wanda’s hand a squeeze since I did mean her, “But some guys assume that means she’s more accessible than some other kind of girl, for some reason, based on some EFFed-up reasoning from their libido.”

What I think happened was that this guy asked Cassie to introduce him to Wanda and it worked out horribly. I’d set that can of worms aside for the moment unless there was a good reason to drag it out into the light of day.

Cassie wanted to think and she wanted to talk. But I thought I had hit the nail pretty close on the head.

“Do you know what Wanda’s father does?” I asked. I wasn’t upset but my buzz trickling away and I’d need a lot more beer to get that back.

“He works in a school. I know that much.” said Cassie.

“He’s the assistant principal at our high school. And he handles discipline. So, if you’re heading to Mr. Anderson’s office, you know you’re in shitload of trouble. My impression of him is that he doesn’t turn that off even when he goes home. If he was strict with his son, I bet he was twice as tough on Wanda. Lord knows how his father brought him up. Probably with a belt.”

“That’s the truth.” said Wanda.

Who would have the nerve to go out with Assistant Principal’s daughter, let alone try to get something going? I know her parents certainly didn’t give her enough breathing room to go out, drink, smoke, fool around, or get in trouble. I can’t even imagine what would have happened is she came home drunk or showed up with a hickey on her neck.”

Her brother is my best friend and I had to hang out with him for fifteen years before they totally trusted me. Once I reached that point I knew I had to be creative. I had to come up some kind of trick play.”

They looked at me in confusion. It had been straight forward conversation up until I said that. “A trick play? What the heck does that mean?”

“Well, it took all that time to gain their trust. Eighteen years! By now I feel like I’ve been adopted into the family. I think they’d even let me sleep in her room, I’m such an angel.” Wanda snorted at that. “Once I reached that point I knew it was time.”

“Time? Time for what?” Neither one of them was even close to what I was thinking.

“They love me so much. It’s like I can’t do anything wrong. Finally, even her parents knew it was time and gave me their permission. I waited until Wanda went to bed and finally went to sleep. Then I put everything in motion.”

“David, you are so full of it. What are you talking about?”

“I gave the cue to the band outside, playing romantic violin music, I put candles all over the house, lit some incense, trickled rose petals all over her while she was sleeping like an angel. Checked everything off my list. I looked her face and whispered her name. ‘Wanda.’ Her eyes opened up and she looked at me with adoration. ‘Oh, David. I’m so ready. Take me.’ Then I ravished her lips and her body and gave her the ‘thumping’ we all agree she needed.”

Cassie’s mouth dropped open and then she laughed out loud. Wanda’s eyes opened wide and her face went beet red. “OMG!” and then she covered her face in embarrassment.

“You are an artist, you know that? I knew it was all BS but I still got wrapped up in the story. Thank you for that.”

“Look at Wanda’s face. She’s trying to decide if it really happened or not. I think she fainted from all the passion and ecstasy and when she woke up she thought it’d all been a dream. Right?”

“David!” Mmmm? “I don’t whether to smack you or take you back to the room and let you repeat your performance.”

“Oooh. That sounds interesting. So, you spent fifteen years planning for the day you could sneak in and have your way with her? In kindergarten?”

“Well, that’s my family. We’re pretty . . . uhm . . . mature when we’re young.”

“Right. Kindergarten. That’s kinda scary, thinking about a horny kindergartener, let alone one that plans that far ahead. And her parents even gave you permission?”

“Oh, yeah. I told you I’m a saint.” Wanda smacked my arm, not too hard. “I’ve even got the permission slip in my car. I thought if I made it down here, I might need to make sure I had it with me. Good for a hundred thumpings.”

“My god. David. How do you come up with these thoughts?”

“Welcome to my brain. Just add alcohol.”

“Well, if any of that is remotely true, she’s doing good job of saving herself for you, hiding out in the library.”

Wanda’s color was returning but she was still a bit red. “I am not. It’s just the guys around here are only interested in getting down your pants.” She said as we cleaned up the table and tossed everything in the trashcan.

“What’s wrong with that?” declared Cassie.

“That’s okay for you. It’s not for me.” And we headed out the door.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

We headed up the sidewalk as the sun was going down. It was definitely time to talk about something else. “Cassie, I love a good conversation. Especially when you laugh so hard you end up with tears in your eyes. But I’m getting a little better about seeing when I’m about to stick my foot in my mouth.”

“A lotta guys down here need to pick up that skill.”

“No doubt. Most guys need that skill. We were talking about a lot of stuff, mostly BS, which is fine. Then I remembered how obnoxious I get when I’ve been drinking. The way my mind works I knew I might end up hurting Wanda’s feelings if I kept going. I wouldn’t do that for anything in the world, not even for a good laugh. Even during that fabrication back there, I was worried I was going too far.”

Wanda’s hand slipped into my hand as we headed down the sidewalk. I looked down our hands and gave her smile. “Hugs, kisses, and holding hands? What would your parents think?” I put a kiss on her cheek. I realized I had enjoyed all three.

“Well, I can see that. If you two aren’t a couple, you should be.”

“Thank you for that. That sounds pretty nice. We’re from the redneck part of Maryland, lots of farms, a lot of white assholes, and I’m pretty sure civil rights hasn’t even gotten there yet. I guarantee you that the Eastern Shore is nothing like Baltimore. I used to like it but now I’m not sure I do.”

I held out my other hand to Cassie and she actually took it. I gave her a smile with it just to show I enjoyed her company, even on such short notice. She had passed my judgment and now she was on my list of new friends. Always room for more friends. Lord knows I didn’t seem to keep my girlfriends happy. I don’t know if I would pass hers but it wouldn’t be for lack of trying. Considering I would have to leave, it would be nice to know she was there to watch Wanda’s back.

We all headed down the sidewalk, just us three, holding hands, the best of buddies. Nothing sensual in it, just good friends. I looked at Cassie. “If this is all just hot air, then I apologize. But I’ll say anything if the end result will make Wanda happier, even if it makes me look like an idiot.”

“Okay, what’s the point?”

“Wanda doesn’t need to be pushed into anything. She’ll do it when she’s ready. And I want her to be happy when she does it. Whether it’s me or some wonderful guy she meets, as long she’s happy with it, that’s okay with me.” Unconsciously something made me look down in dismay, not understanding why. Something inside was really saying, ‘You don’t have to be that generous.’ But I looked up anyway. “You might have more experience behind you, I just don’t think she can get there by following the same route.”

“Alright. I hear you. Sounds almost reasonable when you say it like that. It doesn’t come out like that when I’m trying to get her to put on something slinky and go to a frat party with me.” Still holding hands, we headed down the sidewalk until we reached their dorm.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Her room was a typical dorm room, a couple twin beds, some dressers, and a shared bathroom. Weirdly enough the room was shaped like a boomerang, with a bed out of sight in each arm. Cassie was heading off to get ready for bed but I caught her before she was gone. Wanda went into her room but looked back in curiosity.

“Hey, Cassie.”

“Whatsup?”

I put my hands on her arms, to make it more personal. “Can you do me a favor?” I wanted her to see whatever it was, it was very important to me and wasn’t my usual BS.

“Oh, sure but it’s going to cost you, you know that?”

“Yeah, I thought it might cost me something. I’m gonna have to head back to school tonight or tomorrow. It’s going to be hard to leave. I know you’ve got Wanda’s back. So, I’m not asking anything you’re not already doing. But I just . . can you . . will you . . can you just keep an eye on her? For me. Watch her back. I don’t know what I’m saying.”

“Look at you. The first time tonight you’ve been at a loss for words. So what you’re saying is you love Wanda and want to try to keep her safe but you have to leave and you’re putting yourself under my thumb?”

“Oh, you’re an evil woman.”

“Yes, I am. You know I would’ve been doing that anyway but you couldn’t leave without asking, to make sure it was out in the open. David, I understand. I can see how much you love her. Yes, love. I can see it even if you’re not ready to admit it.” She put her hand on my chest, just like Wanda had. “I promise to do my best. Okay?” I nodded my head. “And still you put yourself under my power? You’re going to owe me but I’m gonna put a lot of thought into that.” With that she gave me a hug and I put my arms around her too.

“Thanks. I owe you.”

“Oh, yes, you do. But I think you knew that even before you asked.”

We let go and I backed up. Wanda hadn’t intruded but her curiosity was through the roof. “Does he have the best hugs or what?”

“Yes, he does and for once nothing was poking me.”

“No and you don’t get to experience that, either.”

“That’s fine, Wanda. I’m gonna spend all night waiting for your screams of passion.”

“Oh, great. No pressure there.”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

“Alright, fess up? You spending the night over there? If you are, that was some pretty quick work.” She wasn’t too bent out of shape. The two people that cared about her the most were right here, so whatever we were speaking about, it was enticing to say the least. I nudged her deeper into her room and wrapped my arms around her. I liked this!

“Hey, Cassie! I had to tell Wanda you were coming over in an hour to sleep with us. She’s okay with that.”

“Cool. Thanks, Wanda. I’m bringing everything I own that runs on a battery. It’s going to be pretty exciting. We’re not gonna get any sleep!”

Wanda’s eyes opened a bit wider than they had. She hadn’t even started thinking about it, let alone consider if it was true or not.

“You had to ask. Curiosity killed the cat, right?” Right then something noisy (that sounded like it ran on a big battery) kicked up in high gear. Most likely it was a Dust Buster but it made quite the impression on both of us. She looked at me, with a glimmer of . . . boy, there were alot of thoughts and emotions running across her face.

I looked in her face and explained. “I told her I’d have to leave and I asked her to watch your back. I know she was going to do that anyway but I wanted her to knew how much it meant to me. She says I owe her a favor now but I think I expected that before I asked. You might want to keep an eye on her if you know I’m coming to visit.”

“Oh, you messed up there. Coming over here to sleep with us would’ve been simpler altogether. You stepped in it there. I’ll make sure you don’t die or something but it’s going to be eye-opening.”

“Oh, well. Been there, done that. I’m not gonna stress about it until it shows up. I’d rather not be hurt in the process, if that’s possible.”

It was getting dark and I was still not sure what was happening. Should happen. Might happen. Shouldn’t happen. Wanda changed into a sleeping gown, ready to settle down for the night. And a bit of perfume? Glad it wasn’t coconut. Me, I was still in my shorts and a t-shirt, which is what I usually slept in anyway. If I stayed, I couldn’t see where I’d be sleeping. For all the boundaries we’d crossed, I wasn’t in any kind of heat. Everything we’d shared had been exquisite but I wouldn’t rush this, whatever ‘this’ was. Maybe the smarter idea was to hit the road.

In one afternoon, we’d broken so many rules and crossed a serious amount of boundaries. Despite enjoying every moment we’d had, I’d reached ‘overload’ an hour ago. “Wanda, if I leave now I can make it back to school in plenty of time. I feel like I’m . . . I’m backing you into a corner. Rushing things. Maybe it is time for me to go. It’s all highway, so it wouldn’t be hard.”

“I don’t want you won’t go. And I don’t feel that way. I feel fine with you staying. Besides you’ve been drinking. If anything happened to you, I’d feel terrible.”

Well, I know I have a wealth of experience driving under the influence and never had a wreck. I don’t know how you convince anyone, especial someone close to you, that you’re a hundred percent and ready to drive another three hours in the dark. “Okay. I know you’d spend the whole time worrying and honestly I don’t have class until after lunch. So, I’ll leave tomorrow morning. How about we just sit and relax and give my brain a rest?”

“That’s a great idea.”

So, I jumped up on her bed and scooted up to the pillows. “Here.” Patting beside me. “Come up here and I’ll promise to behave myself.” I left it up to her to sit where she wanted.

“I know you will. You have entirely too much will power.” She crawled up in that chastity robe she was wearing. As I can remember clearly, it looked like the most inaccessible thing I’d ever seen. “No. This will be for me.” She scooted up, not next to me but back between my legs. She crawled up and settled with her back up against me again. She settled down a bit and snuggled in. She leaned back and reached up with one hand. I gave her one of mine and she wrapped it around her. She held her other hand up. I gave her my other one and she wrapped that one around her.

Again I felt like she was so comfortable she could’ve fallen to sleep in my arms. If I could remain like that she’d be fine, but I’d have a serious crick in my neck. “I feel like a blanket. Do you think blankets are male or female?”

“Well, I’ve never wrapped up in a blanket and had it . . . you know . . . get an erection. So they must be female.”

“That or they’re all male and they’re all gay.” I could see most of her as she settled in. I leaned over her shoulder, lifted a hand up, and began to massage it lightly, arm down to wrist to her fingertips. Gently, lightly.

“Mmmm. That’s interesting. That feels good.”

“Just one of my many talents. We broke a lot of rules today.” She raised her eyebrows. Mmm? “I’ve had four hugs, nine, no ten kisses, holding hands. And now you’re wrapped up in your ‘blanket.’ In fifteen years, we’ve never been alone long enough to do one of those, let alone all three of them.”

“I know. It was truly strange. It was like kissing my brother.”

“No, no, you said I was your boyfriend. Get it right.”

“Alright. I started that, didn’t I? I didn’t think that one through. I didn’t have enough time to think where that might go. You shocked the heck out of me with that kiss.”

“That was the point, wasn’t it? I loved the look in your eyes. And the fact that you couldn’t breathe for a moment. I must be pretty good.”

“Did not. I didn’t have a problem with my breathing and maybe it was your breath that did me in.”

“Wow. And again Wow. Maybe you should consider that we had the same food and drank the same beer, so it’s likely that your breath was as bad as mine.”

“No, that’s not right. It’s because you’re a guy, so that’s why your breath is worse.”

“Man. And you say I’m full of it.” I gave her a smile. “So, if I stay over until tomorrow, do you think we’ll have time to go and get some breakfast? Or would you like to sleep in and have some dessert when we wake up?” What was funny was that we both turned red.

“I’m sure we’ll have time for both. Whatever you want to do.”

“I’m on the verge of fainting now. Anything else is going to give me a heart attack.”

I dropped one hand and reached over for her other one. I was looking over her shoulder to supervise my massage to her hand but her cheek was close enough to feel the warmth from it. My massage wasn’t exactly sensual but it was certainly way beyond what we had ever done before. I was close to her neck and now I could smell perfume she snuck in to put on. I became wrapped up in the distinctive smell that was her. It was something I would remember for years. I could look at the side of her face, her cheek, the line of her jaw, even her ear. I was worked up a bit and everything was overloading my senses. Unconsciously I let my out a huge breath through my nose, which went right down her neck.

She turned around to look at my face. “Are you okay? I didn’t know you had asthma.” She had a wicked gleam in her eye.

“Neither did I. Something must set it off.”

“Has it ever happened before?”

“Nope. Never in my long life. It’s really something when you have your breath taken away.” As I looked at her eyes, her lips, her cheek. I enjoyed looking at her. I gave her a small smile. “It just snuck up on me. I’m okay now but I’m pretty sure it’s gonna happen again.”

“Honestly, it’s never happened to me but I can hope. Maybe we should try to figure out what causes it. Maybe it’s my perfume?”

“Maybe. I’m sure that’s part of it. We’ll have to see.” I took a deep breath and tried to swallow. “What were we talking about? I lost my train of thought. When’s your first class?” Now she was back to sitting more sideways again. I reached down in front of her and found her other hand. I looked at her face briefly, then looked at our hands and tried to focus on what I was doing. Being a gentleman was getting old real quick.

“Mmmm. My first class is at 9:30, with another at 11:00. Then even more in the afternoon. My M-W-F schedule is the worst but Tues-Thurs is a lot less, thank god.”

“You need to have my creative skill. I have my mornings free just so I can watch General Hospital at 10. Then my first class isn’t until noon.”

“You’re kidding. My mother watches that, too. Maybe over break you two can sit and cry together the next time Luke gets in another car accident.”

“How cold-hearted. Luke and Laura are like the greatest couple in the world. It’s magic. Someday when I fall in love I hope it’s just like that.” Then I sniffled to show my sincerity.

“That’s disgusting. You’re probably the only guy in the room, surrounded by ten girls, all of you weeping when somebody ends up in a coma.”

“You are so right. There’s nothing worse than being the only straight guy in a room with ten crying girls, all of them needing comfort in their time of suffering. I am providing a service, I make them happy in the process, and they pay me for it.”

She pulled her hand away in outrage, like she thought I was actually telling the truth. “Pay for it? What are you talking about? They give you money? For what?”

“Relax.” As I captured her hand again. “Well, I’m there to comfort them. How do you think they would pay me? We’re all in our PJs and we’re in the lounge downstairs watching the big TV. Do you think they come down with their wallets or a credit card? What would I do with a credit card? Where would I put it?”

“Oh, I can tell you where to put it. What a slut you are!”

“Hey, I’m a guy. We’re not sluts. We’re escorts or gigolos or service providers. You’re making me feel cheap.”

“Oh my god. You’re so full of it. You really get under my skin!”

“It’s my superpower, driving women crazy.”

“Yeah, I can see that. I’ve been up and down since you got here. Happy and sad, tearing up and in shock. It will be such a relief to put you in your car.”

“Come on. It’s amazing how you believe anything I tell you. It’s like it’s just easier for you to believe the worst in me as opposed to giving me the benefit of the doubt. If you think about it calmly, you know I made all that up. I told you I had a girlfriend for the last two years. What, you think I’m good enough to seduce ten weeping girls? I’ll think I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“Mmmph.”

“I go downstairs because I don’t want my friends to know I got hooked on GH. Our suite smells like cigarettes, throw up, and old beer. I think the girls watch it upstairs, since they actually clean up after themselves. So I’m usually the only one downstairs with tears running down my face. What a terrible opinion you have of me.”

“Well, that’s what you get for spinning tall tales.”

“You’re one that painted the picture of ten weeping girls and called me slut. That was your tall tale, not mine.”

“Okay, okay. I apologize. But you took the ball and ran with it.”

She allowed me pick her arm up and continue my ministrations. Then I lifted her arm up and turned it over so I could see the inside of her wrist. I leaned over to kiss along her arm. Now this was definitely heading into sensual. I wasn’t slobbering on it, okay? Each one was carefully administered and placed exactly where it needed to go. I intended it be slow and let the slow pace turn it into torture. “Stop that. What are doing to my arm?” She breathed in deeply. I was certainly attempting to move from a nice platonic massage to sensual kisses up her arm. I’d given in. Something inside said it was tired of trying to act like a gentleman and I certainly didn’t fight it.

I ran my lips along the length of her arm, loving how soft it was and her distinctive flavor I guess. “I’m giving you a free sample of the services I provide. You say the word and I’ll hit the road. Simple as that. Your parents certainly didn’t send me down here to be a bad influence.”

“No. Too late for that.” She leaned into me and put her head against my chest, while I focused on her arm. “Mmmm. That feels nice. I’ve never. . .”

“Never?”

“Never. Does it make a difference?”

“Not a bit. As long you’re attached to this arm, I’m happy.”

“Mmmm. Thank you.”

“Good. Besides, you still owe me two hugs.”

“Two? Why two?”

“In case the first one lacks in quality.”

“Okay, here’s your hug.” Since she was sitting sideways to me now, her legs went under mine and mine had to go over hers. She slipped one arm behind me, the other across me. Last she tilted her head until it settled on my shoulder, right up near my neck and under my ear. We didn’t realize my neck was one big erogenous zone. Once again I had to take in a deep breath through my nose, since it seems the rest of body was honestly panting. “Oh, David. We better go see a doctor. It’s like you can’t breath.”

“I’m sure it’ll go away once I head back to school. Unfortunately.”

“That’s possible. Come on, take a breath. Calm down, Buttercup.”

“Buttercup, huh?” I let my breath out but it didn’t help that she’d put her head back down and was back to breathing on my neck. A huge shiver ran through me. She was settled in and I wrapped my arms around her. We were about as snuggly as we could get. “Have your blankets ever been so uh cooperative, you know, multi-purpose? Easy?”

“No. I’ve never found one I liked. I also never found one that was right for me. They’re really hard to find.”

We had spent alot of time together over the years but not intimate moments. Maybe it was simply we never had time together. Since I had arrived we gone way over the limit: First kiss, more hugs than we had ever had, walking across campus hand in hand, a hand massage, and now we were wrapped up so close we were more one person that two. “It’s been a long time since I’ve felt so . . .”

“Relaxed?”

“Close.”

“Content? Safe?”

“Those are good choices.”

“Well? You’re making me do all the thinking.”

“Happy?”

“That’s nice to hear. I can’t remember when I thought you were that happy.”

“That’s the truth. It’s the most wonderful feeling in the world. Or it’s just asthma. Some sort of reaction?”

“I bet it’s a reaction. I’m starting to feel some kind of reaction.”

I’m sure I turned beet red, because I was trying to keep that particular gremlin from coming out to play.

“That is such a wonderful shade of red.”

I hung my head in embarrassment and hung it down; I really couldn’t look her in the face. I think we’d gone so far beyond everything we’d ever done that I was simply done in. She put her chin on my shoulder and ran her hand through my hair. “Mmmm.”

I was trying to change my mood, move from embarrassing to some other mindset. I could hope. Usually I’d head down some road (figuratively) and ended up finding myself totally embarrassed from something I did. Changing the subject usually worked. “Did you call me a coward?”

“I don’t remember that. You certainly proved me wrong.”

“You said I had to be wasted. I had to be clear across the state since I’d never have the nerve to say those things to your face. So here I am standing up for my integrity. I always noticed you. I’ve always thought you were pretty. As you’ve gotten older, I think you’re going to be absolutely beautiful. It’s going to be wonderful to see. There were times when I just wanted to look at you but I never was allowed to even do that. Twenty seconds just doesn’t work, especially with your father keeping one eye on me.”

“Ah, I’m so weak. I’ve spent years trying to keep all that locked away. I didn’t think we’d ever have a moment where I’d be able to tell you that to your face.”

“Yes, so weak. I feel so bad for you, seeing you suffer like this.”

“Ha! Yes, it’s terrible. It’s almost too much to bear. . . . Can I touch your ear now?”

The humor of the request reached her. “If you have to.” She said with a smile. She even tilted her face away and gave me access.

“Oh, yes. I have to.” My hand lifted up and I ran the back of my fingers across her cheek, over the edge, down to her neck. Then turned my hand so I could run my thumb across her earlobe, then up and around the curve of her ear. She breathed in some air through her nose. “I’m going to remember that spot forever. I might even write it all down so I don’t forget.”

“Don’t you worry. I won’t let you forget. Another thing to practice over Christmas Break.”

She was looking up at me, a little flush to her face. My hand actually a tremor to it. I was trying to stay in control while the rest of me wanted to speed it up. My eyes were on her face and I could see her breath going in. “What did you say to me? You had crush on me all through high school. I don’t remember you telling me that. Did you?”

“You were our god. Lisa and I worshipped you. We wanted you so bad.”

“Jesus. A god? Really? My god. Even I’ve never said that to anyone. I’ve always been amazed at how people saw me and how totally opposite it is to how I see myself. All my relationships went down in flames. As for being happy, I can’t even tell you if I’ve ever been happy.” All that came rushing out and I certainly didn’t know a tear had leaked out of my eye.

She became quiet and her hand reached up to wipe the tear away.

“I told you the truth.” I ran a thumb around her eye, down her cheek, across her lips. “I think you’re beautiful and I always. . . Wanda!” She could hear how focused I was and gave me her complete attention. “Wanda. I always noticed you. Always. I should’ve told you. I don’t know if it would have made a difference but I always had your back.”

“You might not have said it but I knew it. Somehow. I knew you were always there, so don’t beat yourself up.”

“Good. . . . Everybody needs someone that can tell them how beautiful they are or how wonderful they are. Or that you can see that they’re just as beautiful on the inside as they are on the outside. Sometimes we’re just too close to ourselves that we never get to hear it or believe it.”

“And if my breath is terrible, I’m sorry.” I leaned down to give her a kiss, a kiss that lasted for years. We might have been wrapped in each other’s arms but every ounce of my attention was focused on where our lips met. Our kiss went from being simple to one that involved so much more. Every other kiss I’d ever had was nothing compared to this. It wasn’t exactly a lustful kiss but my tongue was running along her lips and she was matching my movements. I think that a normal kiss wouldn’t have been enough.

We came up for air but for a first kiss it was wonderful. Then I moved down to her neck and did my best to kiss every spot available as she ran her hands through my hair. I must’ve found a spot, as she tensed up and sucked in a breath. “Are you okay? You sound like you’re having trouble breathing, too.”

“No. I’m fine. I’m tired and you’re bothering me.” But she gave me a gentle kiss to take the sting out of the comment.

“Bothering you? I haven’t even started to bother you yet.”

“Promises, promises.”

“Bothering you, huh? I was sent down here to make you feel better.”

“Honestly, my parents didn’t send you down here at all. They were expecting you to give me a phone call. Not come down and seduce me.”

I looked at her face. “Wanda. I swear I didn’t come down here to seduce you.”

“I know that.” Amazing how gentle and relaxed she sounded after all the barriers had been broken down. “I’m actually surprised we actually made it this far.”

“Really? Why?”

“You’ve always been totally wrapped up in whatever you were doing. It’s some sort of tunnel vision. It’s like you’re on your knees watching ants cross the railroad track and you don’t even hear the train coming. I’m just amazed you reached the point where “what” you’re wrapped up in is “me.” I know my mother will be, too.”

I know my mouth opened like a fish. “Your mother?” I had mistakenly thought we were at this moment because I had impulsively decided to drive down to see her instead of making a phone call. But with my tendency to be oblivious to the world around me, I hadn’t seen this story had started without me. With my habit of over-analyzing every damn thing in my life, I was suddenly worried about the people I might have hurt along the way, simply because I wasn’t paying attention. I’m not sure I wanted to know how long I’d had my head stuck in the sand. “I . . . ah . . .” like I had to say something, apologize, explain . . . something.

She lifted up her hand and put a finger on my chin and moved it a little. “Don’t stress out. And don’t apologize. If you were a thoughtless self-centered person we wouldn’t even be here.”

She was reading my thoughts! “You’re smart cookie.”

“No, I’ve just a long time to think about it.”

At that, I felt a surge of guilt and I had to look down. I never liked hurting anyone and she was always at the top of my list. It made me feel really inconsiderate. She put her hand on my chin and lifted it up. “Stop beating yourself up. You’re only responsible for you, no-one else.” She moved a little and I moved a little and then she put a gentle kiss on my lips. “We’ve been together the whole time; you just didn’t realize it.”

I took this moment to look at her face, caress it with my eyes. Today, honestly, was the first moment where we’d ever been alone long enough for . . . anything. Certainly we’d never been alone enough where we didn’t have to worry about someone parental barging in on us. Or her brother. Lord knows what he’d think. Would he blame it all on me or all on her?

I slipped my hand up, let my thumb run along her jaw line, up across the high part of her cheek, then back, softly, softly, as it ran gently, sensually across her lips. Consciously or unconsciously she leaned into my hand with each touch I made, then gave it a kiss before it left. I looked her in the eye, at her face, full of wonder. Like I’d been blind and suddenly I could see. Quietly, not quite a whisper, “Wow. I could look at you forever.”