In The Death Cell

I sat in the window, listening to Billy Joel and watching Jimmy play. I reflected on the turn my life had taken over the previous two weeks. I should’ve been happy just having Jimmy back in my life, but it wasn’t working out that way. I had a daughter that I never got to fall in love with, while in her mother’s womb, but fell for instantly the first time I saw her. The problem was since she was barely a week old, I never got to see her.

I had no idea that I would have such a hole in my heart for my little Alison. I longed to drive over to Carrie’s parents’ house and see her, but I didn’t want to see my ex. Especially, not after her she begged me to give her a second chance.

I got a call from my lawyer, the day before, and he put together a standard schedule of visitation to cover both children and an amended child support agreement. It was sitting with Carrie’s attorney for them to agree on, or we’d have to go back to court. I was hoping Carrie would be civil and not take me back to court, but I had a feeling it wasn’t going to be painless. The only leverage I had, was her wanting a second chance and I blew her hopes of that.

***

“Hey, dad!” Jimmy shouted as he bounced into the house. “Do I have to go back to Grandma and Grandpa’s today?”

“Yep, your sister is on a schedule now and your mom’s got a rhythm going, so she can take care of both of you now.”

“Why can’t I stay here?”

“We talked about that, Jimmy. Your mom has custody of you, and there’s nothing I can do about that. I’m just happy that I can see you now.”

“Me too, but what about Alison?”

“We’ll have that all ironed out soon. I want to see her just as bad as I wanted to see you when I couldn’t.”

“What’s for dinner?”

I laughed at my child’s ability to change the subject to food.

“How about I grill some steaks?”

He frowned and asked, “Can we go for pizza? We can pick up Alison on the way.”

“Alison can’t eat pizza yet, bud. She’ll be breastfeeding for a long time.”

“Okay, so we can bring mom too, so she can feed Alison.”

I shook my head. “I know what you’re trying to do. Jimmy, it’s not going to happen. Your mom tossed me away for another man. We will never be together again.”

“Whatever!” He stormed off to his room. I hoped the kid would get it through his head soon that what he wanted wasn’t going to happen.

***

I pulled into Dan’s driveway and intended to walk Jimmy to the door and see Alison. Since I couldn’t get any real amount of time with her, I’d get take every scrap I could.

“Hey, Jim,” Dan said, opening the door. Jimmy ran past him after a quick fist bump.

“Hi, Dan,” I was hoping to get to see Alison for a bit.

“She was just put to bed, but you know babies. She’s probably still wiggling around. Come on in.”

He led me into the spare bedroom where Alison’s crib was set up, and Carrie was sitting in the rocking chair in the corner. I didn’t even see her in the darkness of the room, but she whispered hello to me.

I nodded and whispered, “I just wanted to see her for a bit, if that’s okay.”

“it’s okay, get a good look, because pretty soon you’ll never see her again.”

“What?” I asked, louder than I should, but the baby didn’t stir.

“Carrie, what are you talking about?” Dan asked.

“It’s simple, dad. If Jim won’t give me a second chance, I’ll never allow him to have visitation with her or Jimmy. I’ll fight like hell and do whatever it takes to make sure he never sees either of his children.”

I was about to scream at her, when Dan put his hand on my shoulder. “Don’t say anything you’ll regret, or she can use against you. I’m a witness to everything that’s happening in this room and I’m not going to stand by and let her do that. I’ll find the best father’s rights attorney in the state, and we’ll fight her tooth and nail.”

Carrie stood and said, “Dad, if you get in the way of my family staying together, I’ll cut you out and you’ll never see your grandchildren again.”

“Have you lost your mind?” Jane said walking into the room. “I heard everything you said on the baby monitor. If you think that you can blackmail him into taking you back, you’ve got another thing coming. Carrie, I’m begging you, do not start a war you already lost.”

“Let’s discuss this in the kitchen.” Dan interjected. He probably sensed my impending explosion.

They all left the room, and I spent a few extra seconds with my baby. I put my finger in her tiny hand and almost cried when her little fingers wrapped around it reflexively. She was so beautiful; I couldn’t see any way I could live without her in my life.

I walked into the kitchen, hearing the argument. I wasn’t as much an argument as it was Dan and Jane berating Carrie for being stupid.

“Jim, don’t worry about anything,” Dan said. “You’re not alone in this, that I can promise you.”

“Carrie, where’s all this coming from? You divorced me. You made your choice. You have to live with that.”

She frowned and a tear fell. “I made a mistake. You have to forgive me and put our family back together.”

“Carrie,” I sighed, “your mistake, was an affair that led to you divorcing me.”

“Oh, please! You act like you’re the innocent player in our little drama. If you would’ve spent more time with me, I’d have never been driven into another man’s arms. In all of your overtime, working weekends, coming home too tired to do anything that didn’t involve Jimmy, where were you for me? How many times did you fall asleep in your lazy boy, watching a TV show? How many times did you make love to me in the 6 months before I succumbed to that asshole’s charms?”

“I see,” I said with no idea that there was any problem between us. “So instead of talking to me, and telling me what you were feeling, you fucked the neighborhood asshole. I understand you leaving me thinking you were having his kid. By then you were stuck, but it was a conscious decision to screw him the first time. You should have talked to me. I won’t disagree that I bear some fault in what happened, but you handled it the worst possible way you could; and I can’t forgive that.”

She looked away as I continued, “Carrie, you robbed me of all of that time with my son because that asshole told you to get a restraining order on me. How do you expect me to forgive that? How can I forget all of the nights I cried myself to sleep, wondering if I’d ever see my son again? And now, you want to take him away from me again, along with my daughter? This is not going to end well. It’s not going to end well for the kids. We can’t go forward in war mode. We have to be able to get along for their sakes. I’m sorry, but that does not include reconciling with you and forgetting you threw me away.”

She started sobbing and Jane hugged her. “Honey, please don’t punish Jim anymore. He doesn’t deserve what you’re doing to him. You ripped his heart out and you’re trying to do it again. It’s over, dear.”

Carrie broke down again and buried her head in Jane’s shoulder. I looked at her with Dan standing behind her with his hand on her back and I silently waved goodbye. I’d had enough, and by the looks of it so did she. I only hoped she would do the right thing. I knew my first call on Monday would be to my attorney, so I could be as proactive as possible.

***

I opened a beer and decided I needed to get off of my butt and get back into the dating scene. It was more than clear to me I wasn’t getting back together with Carrie, blackmail or not, and I’d need to meet someone. On the spur of the moment, I decided to go out and see what I could find in the dating scene.

Not having dated in over a decade, I knew I would be in for a shock as I had no clue how to talk to a woman in which I was interested. I showered and ordered an UBER, thinking I’d figure it out as I went along.

I looked through my closet and realized I would need to spruce up my wardrobe. How much more cliché could I be? A divorced man that had no decent clothes. I planned to call my sister and let her shop with me. She always picked my clothes out before Carrie; I was sure she’d do it again.

I chose a pair of khaki shorts and a golf shirt. I suppose there was some irony, in that Carrie bought the outfit for me, but I didn’t care. I looked at myself in the mirror and liked what I saw.

I was in good shape, had a full head of hair, and a three-day old scruff on my cheeks. Put all of that with my stable job and money in the bank, I thought I was a pretty good catch. I slipped on my canvas boat shoes and was ready to go.

I decided to go to the local sports bar. It may not have been the best choice to look for single women, but I didn’t think I was ready for a club, or the country dance bar where I met Carrie. I was glad I made that choice as a couple of friends were there.

“Holy shit!” Jack shouted from his table, making everyone turn to look at me.

I walked over and got bro hugs from Jack and his table mates, Alan and Chris. I knew the guys from the old days, but marriage and children got in the way of staying close. They were all single guys and as anyone who is married can probably relate to, single guys fall out of the friend group of married guys after a while for a variety of reasons.

“How’s it going, men?” I asked, signaling the waitress for a glass.

“Same shit, different story, Jim. I heard you got divorced.”

I nodded as the waitress set the glass on the table, “Bring another pitcher on your way around, please.”

“That sucks, man,” Chris lamented. “What happened?”

“She tried to trade up and divorced me. It blew up in her face though and now she’s trying to get me back.”

They all laughed, and Jack said, “Ah! So, you’ve decided to come out and find a replacement before she can get her hooks into you again? Smart.”

I laughed, “No, I’m not going back, but I do figure it’s time to get out again.”

Alan smirked and said, “Maddie’s single for the first time in our adulthood. Steve cheated on her, and she kicked him to the curb last year.”

“No, shit?”

Maddie Ross was one of the “it-girls” in high school, and I, well, every guy, had a crush on her. She dated Steve Clark all throughout high school and got knocked up before she graduated college.

“She’s here.” Jack said slyly. “She and Heather Scott play bar trivia. They are sitting over by the dartboards.”

My eyes darted across the room and there she sat. Her raven black hair framing her beautiful face perfectly. It was as if she hadn’t aged a day in the last decade or so. I thought about going over to say hi, but I had no idea what I would say after that. “Hey, since we’re both divorced from cheaters, do you wanna get some coffee?” i decided not to do anything.

Jack must’ve read my mind, “Hey, Jim, I’ve got an itch to play trivia tonight. What do you say we move over to the other side and grab a table before it fills up over there?”

I laughed and was about to play it off when the others stood. Chris said, “No one stands a chance against us. We’re the kings of useless knowledge.”

I succumbed to the peer pressure, and we found another table. It was time for another pitcher, so I called over the waitress and ordered a pitcher of golden goodness. Jack grunted and nodded towards the table where Heather and Maddie were sitting.

I shook my head and asked the waitress, “Could you send a round to the table with the blonde and black-haired ladies?”

“Sure,” she said with a smirk. “Good luck.”

That caused the guys to laugh and soon we were all laughing at how ridiculous I was, trying to act like I knew how to get the girl. I had positioned myself at the table, so I was sitting with a direct sight line to Maddie’s table. I was amazed at how her eyes seemed to smile when she laughed. She was still gorgeous.

The waitress delivered our pitcher, and walked over to the ladies, set their drinks down, and pointed my way. I smiled and lifted my beer in an air toast. Heather laughed and whispered in Maddie’s ear while Maddie was returning my air toast. She shook her head no at whatever Heather was saying and turned her head away. Heather gave me the come over finger wag and that’s when the fellas started up on me to go and talk to them.

I took a deep breath and stood. I knew I needed to get back in the game and I had the perfect opportunity to get my first strike-out out of the way, so I walked over as cool as I could. Of course, that meant that I trembled, and my hands were sweating profusely.

Before I could say anything too stupid, Heather took pity on me. “Jim Spellman, you’re pretty bad at the buying a drink for the ladies game. You’re supposed to deliver them yourself, so you can be thanked properly.”

I smiled as they giggled at me. Jesus, I felt like I was a sixteen-year-old kid again.

“Sorry, Heather. I wasn’t sure if you guys would remember me. It’s been a long time. Maddie, hello.”

“Hi, Jim. Of course, we remember you. No one forgets the cute guys they went to high school with.”

I must’ve blushed because they started giggling again.

“I thought you were married, Mr. Spellman. What would Mrs. Spellman say about this?” Heather asked.

I held up my bare left hand and said, “Divorced for over six months now.”

“Sorry to hear that,” Heather said while Maddie sat up a bit straighter.

“I see you’re married,” I said, pointing to the nice sized rock on her finger.

“Yep, five years now. I married Kevin Carlson and have twin three-year-old girls.”

“Nice. I have a ten-year-old son, and a newborn daughter.”

Maddie asked, “A newborn? You said you were…”

I cut her off. “Yeah, she was pregnant with my kid when she left me for her lover.”

Maddie looked at me aghast. Heather said, “I bet that’s some story?”

“Well, it’s probably best for another time and place though. I hear they have trivia tonight?”

I was hoping my change of subject was subtle enough.

“Yep. We never miss it,” Maddie said brightly. “Would you like to join us or are your friends counting on you to lead them to victory tonight?”

“No, not at all. It was a last-minute decision for me to come out tonight. I didn’t even know they were here.”

“That explains it then.” Heather said.

“What’s that?”

“You didn’t shave.” Maddie said, making them both giggle again.

I rubbed my cheek and said, “I guess I’m a bit scruffy. I thought I had a bad boy charm-thing going on.”

They laughed that time. Maddie said, “You can’t be a bad boy wearing preppie clothes.”

They continued to laugh, and I said, “Excuse me.” I walked away to get my beer from the other table.

The guys gave me fist bumps and Jack said, “Go get her, tiger,” causing the others to laugh. They were probably hoping I failed in order to get some more entertainment for the evening.

When I turned back, I saw the girls were arguing. I walked back over and heard Heather chastise Maddie for running me off. I smiled inwardly as I surprised them by sitting in the empty chair.

“Miss me?”

They turned and smiled at the same time. Damn! Maddie was pretty. It was all I could do to not stare into her sparkling eyes.

Maddie smirked and said, “Don’t choke tonight. We expect to win.”

“I’ll do my best to not screw up.”

***

After a couple of hours of trivia, we were in the lead by two points over a table full of older folks that looked like college professors. The host asked the final question and announced it was worth five points.

“This 1977 album contained the hits, ‘She’s Always A Woman’ and ‘Just The Way You Are’.

I laughed and the ladies looked at each other with no clue. I took the slip of paper, wrote, “The Stranger” and walked up to the host. On my way back to the table, I winked at the table of professors.

“That was the easiest question all night,” I said before taking a sip.

“Maybe for you,” Maddie said. “I don’t even think I’ve ever heard those songs.”

Heather laughed and said, “I at least know they’re Billy Joel songs.”

“No worries, ladies. I happen to be a big fan of his and that’s one of my favorite albums.”

Just then the host announced the answer and us as winners. We hooted and hollered and accepted our major award: a fifty-dollar gift certificate for the bar where we were. I let the ladies have it for their tab which included food.

Maddie said, “Well, I’m turning into a pumpkin. My babysitter won’t stay past twelve.”

I stood along with them and asked, “May I walk you out?”

They smiled and in unison, said, “Please.”

As we walked, I was surprised when Maddie took my hand. I looked at her and I swear her eyes twinkled. I felt like I was on top of the world for a change, and I hoped she’d agree to see me for a date.

“Well, this is us,” Heather said.

I didn’t let go of Maddie’s hand, but brought it to my lips for a kiss, and then felt like a dork for doing it.

“Maddie, I’d like to see you again. May I have your number?”

“I’d like that, Jim.” She took my proffered phone and dialed her number. “Saturdays are good for me and so are Sundays until the afternoon. We have a standing dinner engagement with my parents on Sundays.”

“Great,” I smiled. “How about we just plan to do dinner together Saturday and then come back here for trivia. We have a title to defend.”

Heather laughed and said, “I’m still coming, you two.” That made us laugh and I kissed Maddie on the cheek.

“Goodnight, Maddie. Heather, you drive safe now.”

“I’m good.”

I nodded and opened the door for Maddie. As I watched the ladies drive away, I felt good and hoped the feeling would last.

***

Monday morning, I went back to work. I took my break at 9, so I could call my attorney and let him know of Carrie’s threat.

He said, “Jim, don’t sweat it. Her lawyer just faxed over the signed amendment to the divorce decree. She agreed with shared custody and the visitation schedule we laid out. I’ll get the original by courier soon and once filed, it’s all set. Congratulations.”

I was shocked. When I got home that evening, she was sitting on my steps with Jimmy and Alison.

“What’s all this?” I asked.

“I brought you dinner for helping with Jimmy over the last week or so, and to apologize.” I saw the casserole dish behind her and smiled. “Tuna casserole?”

“Of course. It was always your favorite; I hope that hasn’t changed.”

“I’m looking forward to it. I can’t make it the same, no matter what I try.”

“You should’ve called me, I could’ve…” she realized what she said and stopped cold. “I’m sorry. I suppose you couldn’t call me.”

“Well, let’s get inside before the chipmunks want their share.” I said.

She set the baby carrier on the carpet, and I went to pick Alison up.

“Oh, no you don’t! I know how sweaty and scummy you are when you get home. You go take your shower. When you’re done, you can hold her all she’ll let you.”

Sweaty and scummy. Yeah, she meant the grease monkey crap. I prayed a silent prayer for God to grant me the strength to stand my ground. Every time I saw her my love for her died a little more.

***

Dinner conversation was kept light and after dinner, she told Jimmy to play in his room while we talked. She handed Alison to me and although she got fussy, she didn’t cry.

Newborn babies are kind of boring. They can’t really do anything, and they have their head supported. I always messed that up with Jimmy and had to be constantly reminded. I saw Carrie about to say something to me and I said, “I’m supporting her head.”

She laughed and said, “Ten years later, it’s still a force of habit.”

I sighed and asked, “So, what’s all this about?” I knew she signed the agreement. I wasn’t sure if she knew I knew that.

“I agreed to the visitation and child support agreements.” She had her head down, looking at a spot on the carpet, I guess.

“What happened to…”

“Please don’t remind me. I was out of line saying that and I never would have done that to you. I’m just so desperate to have you back, I’d do anything.”

“I wish you felt that way about me before you threw me away. It seems to me that you don’t want me back. You need me back, now that your lover flamed out. I’m sorry, Carrie. I really am. I just can’t ever trust you again.”

She looked at me with tears in her eyes. I adjusted Alison, lifting her to rub her cheek.

“Can we at least be friends? For Jimmy’s sake? Alison, won’t know the difference, but with Greg gone, Jimmy thinks we should be back together.”

“He’s just a kid and has no idea of the depth of hurt you put on me. Not only did you cheat on me, you left me, and then you saddled me with that bullshit restraining order just because your better man told you to. I was never a danger to you or Jimmy. Him? Definitely, but not you and you knew that. You put me in a hellish prison with no hope of visitation from the only light in my life. You crushed my soul, and you don’t even seem to care about that.”

“Jim, I…”

“No! Don’t give me the fake, heartless apology now. You’re at the most desperate point in your life and it’s self-inflicted. You say that I drove you into his arms because I worked a lot and was tired? Fine, but think about this. In order for his seduction to work, you had to have been receptive to it. You never told me that I was pushing you away. You never told me I was in danger of losing you. No. You chose to allow yourself to be taken in by his bullshit. Christ, Carrie, no one liked the guy and all of a sudden, you’re falling to some irresistible charm he supposedly had? It doesn’t make sense.”

She was crying, and Alison was fussing.

“Carrie, I think you were looking to cheat on me and chose him because no one would suspect it. Later, when you were pregnant, you had a choice of him or me and you chose him. You’ll never convince me that you weren’t trying to trade up. I won’t believe it.”

“Jim, can we please not talk about this anymore. I’m sorry for everything. You’ll never understand how sorry I am, and I accept that it’s my fault. Can we please just try to get along for them?”

I leaned back and thankfully Alison settled down. “We can be friends, but I’ll never take you back.”

“I know.”

***

After Carrie and my children left, I texted Maddie.

“Hey, I didn’t want you to forget me. I’m looking forward to Saturday.”

There was no response for a while, and I found myself nervously pacing, along with looking at my phone every few seconds. I hoped I wasn’t out of line texting her. I knew I was a dating newbie; I had no idea how to date a mother. When do I meet her kids? When do our kids meet? Do they meet? Is it a bad sign if she doesn’t want me to meet her kid? My mind was a mess, and I hadn’t even had a first date with her yet.

After ten agonizing minutes, I received a call. Relief washed over me when I saw it was her.

“Hey, Maddie.”

“Hey yourself, handsome. I’m not much of a texter. I like to talk.”

“Oh, sorry. What are you up to?”

“Just gave my little one a bath.”

“Little one? I heard you had an older child but didn’t know about a younger one.”

“Yep, I’ve got three. Eleven, Seven, and Three. That won’t scare you off, will it?” I heard fear in her voice.

I laughed and said, “No. I love kids. You know I’ve got two myself.”

“Yeah, our oldest go to school together.”

“Really? I’m surprised to hear that. I don’t remember seeing you at any school things.”

“I used to have a pretty crappy schedule. I only recently started working first shift. I was working second shift for a long time.”

“At the hospital, right?” I remembered her telling me she was a CQA, CAN, or CNA something or another.

“Mm, hm. It’s what broke up my marriage. Well, my cheating bastard ex broke it up, but he blamed my work shift and never seeing me when he was horny.” She laughed.

“Sorry about that. It’s similar to what my wife said. I worked too much and was too tired or in a bad mood. Blah, blah, blah.”

We laughed together until she said, “It’s all bullshit. They cheat and need to deflect the fault on everyone but themselves and their selfish behavior. Do you know how many times I was horny and could’ve had my itch scratched by anyone I picked off the street? I never did though. I don’t have it in me to do that to my partner. Cheaters don’t have that moral stop. They find a way to justify what they want, and they go for it, regardless of anyone else’s feelings or vows that they made.”

“Yeah, she keeps trying to get me back. I had her, my son, and her parents all ganging up on me. I think they’ve finally got it through their heads that I’m the victim in this mess.”

“We are victims, aren’t we? You haven’t had any therapy or counseling, have you?”

“No, did you?”

“Yeah. It helped a lot. I’ll give you the name of my guy. He really helped me get past the whoa is me feelings. You’re a lot farther along than I was though. You at least recognized that you needed to move on. I stayed shut in my house like I was in prison until I got it through my head that I had to rejoin the world of the living. For my kids as much as myself.”

I laughed and said, “Well, we’re a well-matched pair, I’ll give you that.”

She laughed and said, “We sure are. That’s why I’ve been looking forward to Saturday, since you kissed my cheek. Oh, shoot! I’ve got to go, somethings up with my three-year-old. She’s crying.”

“Of course, I’ll talk to you soon.”

I smiled and set the phone on the table. I loved the feeling of hope I felt at that moment.

***

Saturday morning, I called my sister.

“Hi, Jim,” she answered cheerfully.

“Jenny, do you have some time this morning to go shopping with me. I need to spruce up my wardrobe.”

“Holy shit! You have a date.”

I laughed, “Yeah, I have a date tonight with Maddie Clark.”

“Maddie Ross? Wow, she’s gorgeous. I heard Steve really did a number on her when he cheated on her. Called her a frigid bitch and my friend Jill told me he said she couldn’t give a blow job to save her life.”

“I hope that’s not true.”

“Don’t be an ass, big brother. I’m free all day. Do you want to meet for lunch at the mall and then shop?”

“Sounds good. Let’s meet at Red Robin at noon.”

***

“Mom’s super excited to be a grandma again. She just adores Alison,” Jenny said sitting down at the restaurant.

“Yeah, she visits with her at Jane’s quite a bit. I know Carrie’s left her with mom once or twice too.”

“So, how are you doing with all of that?”

“Better. Carrie has finally let up on getting back together and I love that little girl.”

She nodded and we ordered.

“So, you’re moving on with Maddie, huh? She always was a looker, but not stuck up like some of the other hot girls. I think you’ll be good together.”

“It’s funny. I went out last week just to see what it was like to go out as a single guy. I had no idea I’d find someone that night. It’s almost too much. I really expected her to shoot me down.”

“Well, just be yourself. If you try to impress her or are fake with her, she’ll smell it right away and you’ll blow it. You’re a great guy who any girl would want, so use that to your advantage.”

“Thanks. I’m afraid I don’t know how to date though. What do people do nowadays?”

She laughed and said, “Bro, Maddie’s your age. It’s not the same as dating a twenty-year-old. Do the same things you would have done with Carrie. Movies, dinner, you could also take her to the country bar and line dance the night away. She’d love any of those things.”

“You’re right. I didn’t think of it that way. I may not be as clueless as I thought.”

“No, you’re still plenty clueless.” She laughed as I shook my head.

***

That evening I walked up the sidewalk to Maddie’s townhouse. There was a boy playing basketball in the driveway, who I assumed was her son, and he threw me the ball when I caught his eye. I dropped the flowers I was carrying, in order to catch the ball and he laughed. I guess he didn’t like flowers. I took a shot and missed, causing him to laugh harder.

“Keep laughing, kid,” I said with a smile. “What’s your mom gonna do when she sees the condition her flowers are in?”

He looked at the flowers and ran to them. “They’re not broken, are they? She loves flowers.”

“Roses are pretty tough, you got lucky. I’m Jim.”

“Hi, I’m David. Please, don’t tell mom I made you drop them.”

“I’ll let it slide this time.”

“Thanks,” he said with a smile. “Come on in. I’ll tell her you’re here.”

I followed him up the steps and into the house. I smiled seeing the living room set up for a sleepover, with pillows and blankets on the floor and a stack of DVDs in front of the TV stand. As he ran up the steps, the three-year-old walked around the corner with a sippy cup in her hands.

She froze, screamed and ran for the stairs. David and the seven-year-old met her at the bottom of the stairs and he picked her up.

“Sorry, she doesn’t like strangers and you scared her,” David said quietly.

“I see you’ve met the clan,” Maddie said as she walked down the stairs. She looked fantastic, wearing a long billowy skirt and loose blouse.

She stopped and took the little one from David. “This is David.” She looked at him and continued, “You go to school with his son Jimmy.”

“Jimmy Spellman?”

She nodded.

“Cool,” he said and bounced off.

“This is my darling daughter, Samantha.” She touched the middle child’s head.

“You can call me Sammi, like everyone else,” she said with a glare.

“Nice to meet you, Sammi.”

“And this little peanut is Bella. You’re going to need to let her get used to you. She’s not great with meeting new people, as I heard you find out already.”

I waved my fingers at the little girl, and she buried her head in Maddie’s chest.

“I’m sorry, my mom’s running a few minutes late. She’s spending the night tonight,” she said with a wink. I wondered if I wasn’t going to bed alone.

“No problem, we have plenty of time.”

“How about a beer while we wait? Or would you like a glass of wine?”

“Beer’s good, thanks,” I said as she put down the little girl who immediately ran up the stairs. Sammi laughed as she picked up the abandoned sippy cup and followed her sister upstairs.

“You have a beautiful family,” I said as she handed me the beer.

“Thanks. They can be a handful, especially David, but they’re good kids.”

I nodded and sat on the couch, after moving a doll over. If there is one thing that goes hand in hand with having kids, it’s that no matter how well you keep your home clean, there’s always someone to come along and clutter it up.

“So, you and Steve got married, huh? That’s not surprising. You were inseparable at school.”

She laughed and said, “We were together because we were part of a group, and everyone paired up. We were the only ones to last past high school and that’s simply because I was comfortable with him and didn’t know any better. When the condom broke and I ended up pregnant with David, we did what some would call the right thing and married. It wasn’t exactly shotgun stuff, but we were never in love that way. I suppose it was doomed from the first I do.”

I nodded and sipped my beer. I looked at my watch and she asked, “Do we have a reservation we’ll be late for?”

“We won’t be late. I didn’t mean to…”

She cut me off, “Don’t be so nervous. I’ve been looking forward to this all week.” She smiled that bright smile that made her eyes sparkle and my boxers get tighter.

“Me too,” I confessed. “I totally expected to get shot down by you last week. I’m glad I didn’t.”

“There was really no chance of that. I knew you were a good guy back in school, and unless you became a complete dick since, I was going to give you a shot. I’m glad you didn’t become a dick.”

We laughed together and her front door opened. “Sorry I’m late.”

“Hi, mom. No worries,” Maddie said with a smile. “Mom, this is Jim Spellman. We went to high school together.”

Mrs. Ross smiled and said, “Nice to meet you, Jim. Be good to my favorite daughter, or I’ll find you.”

I laughed and said, “I thought it was the dad that was supposed to give me the warnings?”

She frowned and said, “I’m afraid my John died last year.”

“Shoot, I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Don’t worry about it, young man. You just have a good time, but not too good.”

We laughed again and I knew I liked her mom.

“We have to get going, mom,” Maddie said reaching for my hand. “The popcorn is on the counter. David knows how to use the machine for it, and I just ordered the pizzas on my app, and they’ll be here in an hour. Don’t wait up.”

She kissed her kids goodbye and we left Mrs. Ross was cackling as we walked out the door.

***

When we sat at our table at the steakhouse, the unthinkable happened. Dan and Jane were seated two tables over. I wanted to run to the door before they saw me, but Maddie saw the fear in my eyes.

“What’s wrong, Jim?”

I sighed as I pushed her chair in. “My in-laws are two tables over, on your left.” She looked and as soon as she did, they saw us.

I couldn’t have predicted their reaction to seeing me on a date, but I shouldn’t have worried. They both lit up with wide smiles and walked over.

“Hi, Jim. Nice to see you out and about. Who’s the pretty lady?” Dan asked with a smirking Jane holding his arm.

“Hi, guys. This is my date, Maddie. Maddie, these are my in-laws, Dan and Jane.”

“Maddie,” Jane started, “You’ve got a keeper here. Don’t blow it like my stupid daughter did.”

Maddie looked at her like a deer in headlights. “Uh, okay. I’m not sure what to say.”

Dan laughed and said, “Say nothing. Just enjoy your evening. It was nice to meet you.” He patted me on the back, and they went back to their table.

“Well, that was something,” she said.

“Yeah. They’re good people. When Carrie tried to bluff that she was going to take my kids away if I didn’t take her back, they went off on her.”

“Do you really believe it was a bluff?” She asked.

“Not 100%. I think that it was something that she had as an option and in desperation let it fly out of her mouth without thinking about it. I’m not going to worry about it. I’ve moved on and she signed the custody agreement.”

She took my hand and said, “Good. Never forget what she put you through but get along for the kid’s sake. They’ll notice if you’re constantly bickering. Don’t trust her.”

I nodded and when the waitress came over, I asked her to send over a couple of desserts for Dan and Jane.

***

We walked into the bar and found Heather holding our table. Jack and the guys were there again and gave me a thumbs up when they saw me making Maddie laugh. God! I loved her laugh.

“So,” Heather started, “where’d you go for dinner?”

“The Chop House,” Maddie answered. “You won’t believe it, but his ex-in-laws were there and came to our table.”

“Holy shit! What did you do?”

“Nothing. They were sweet and told me not to let him go like their stupid daughter did.”

“Wow! Talk about a first date for the record books. Jim, are you ready to defend our title?”

“You bet. I see the professors are back.” I looked at their table and one of them nodded, while another dragged his thumb across his throat as if to say I was a dead man. I loved good trash sign language.

“Well, we got lucky with the Billy Joel question at the end. We need to build a bigger lead tonight,” Maddie said bumping her shoulder into mine.

“No problem, ladies. We got this.”

And we did have it. We had a ten-point lead going into the last question. The host tried to monkey around and made the last question worth twelve, but it was a question about some country and western singer that Heather loved.

As we walked Heather to her car, Maddie and I had our arms around each other’s waists. She felt so good in my arms, I never wanted to let her go and I hoped what I felt lasted a long time.

“Good night, guys,” Heather said, giving a hug to Maddie, then surprising me with one for me.

“Drive safe, honey,” Maddie said.

As we watched her drive away, Maddie said, “It’s still early and you have two options. First, you can take me back inside and we can talk, and we can continue to get to know one another better. Or you can take me to your house, and we can get to know each other better in a more fun way.”

I’m no idiot, I chose to take her home with me.

***

“Can I get you a glass of wine? I’ve got red and white, or I have beer,” I asked as we settled into my living room.

“White would be nice, it it’s chilled.”

“Of course. I’m not a savage.”

She laughed and kicked off her shoes as I went to get the bottle of wine I bought, hoping to be in the situation I found myself. I wasn’t sure how far she would let me go with her, but I couldn’t help the half-erection I was sporting in anticipation. I hadn’t had sex with anyone other than Carrie in so long, I hoped I could live up to whatever expectation Maddie had.

“Here you go, Mads. My favorite Pinot Grigio for my favorite girl.”

“Mads?” She asked with a smirk.

“What? Too soon for a pet name?”

“No, not at all. I like it. My dad called me Mads when I was a little girl.”

“Oh, I…”

“Stop being nervous. It’s okay. My dad would’ve liked you.”

I set my glass down and watched her take a big gulp of hers before she set it down as well.

I made a big gesture of stretching my arms out and ending around her shoulder like a teenager at a movie.

“Ooh, slick move there, Ace.” She laughed. “Don’t try too hard, honey. I’ve been waiting to find a man like you since I came out of my prison. Now that I found you, I’m looking forward to dessert.”

She was very forward, which I found slightly unnerving, but in a good way. Almost like being in the first car on a roller coaster and looking down at the drop.

I leaned and kissed her. Softly, just a caress of her lips with mine. She moaned, wrapped her arm around my neck and pulled me closer, kissed me harder.

We made out for a few minutes, and then my hand had a hold on a firm breast. She sighed as my thumb stroked her hard nipple and pulled back.

“This isn’t a one-time thing is it, Jim? I…”

I silenced her with a kiss.

“No, I like you a lot and we don’t have to make love tonight if that’s what you’re worried about. I’m in no hurry and I’m good with dialing it back a bit.”

She sat up and said, “I like how you called it making love.” She smiled, God! I loved her smile. “Look, I’m sorry. I know I came on really strong and honestly, I was going to have sex with you, but I’ve changed my mind.”

I took her hand and asked, “Are you okay?”

“No, but it’s nothing you did. I’m not usually like this. This is my first real date with anyone other than my ex and Heather told me I had to have sex with you to keep you interested in me, but I…”

“She’s an idiot.” I said, cutting her off again.

She sighed, “You don’t know how it is for a thirty-year-old woman with three kids. I can’t imagine any man wanting to take on a ready-built family of kids that aren’t his.”

I pulled her into my chest and held her tightly. “Maddie, you having kids is not a negative mark on you. It’s just a part of the package. You don’t have to have sex with me to keep me coming back. I sure wouldn’t mind it, but I like you a lot and that’s enough to keep me interested. Besides, I’ve got two kids. Does that put me down a peg in your mind?”

She smiled all the way to her eyes. “Thank you, Jim.”

“So, what else did Heather tell you to do to me?”

She slapped my shoulder playfully and kissed me. “Okay, big guy. Let’s have some fun, but the clothes stay on tonight.”

***

As if it were right out of the dating playbook, we waited until our third date before we took it to the next level.

After a romantic dinner at some fancy restaurant she chose, we ended up at my house. I poured her a glass of wine and we sat on my couch and made out hot and heavy. She broke our passionate kissing and said, “Jim, I’d like you to show me your bedroom.”