If you’re not interested in how a Closed Loop Relationship might work, you may well skip this chapter and move on to Chapter five. While sexual activity is discussed, there is no “action” in this chapter. It is mostly about the concept of a CL Relationship. This is a work of fiction, and all characters are over the age of eighteen years.
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Wives and husbands had talked it over. The women and men had met to discuss it. Now it was time for everybody to sit down together. They were all at Greg and Judy’s place this time. They grilled lobster tails and had a really nice white wine with dinner. Afterwards they went outside by the lake and watched the sunset. Greg and Judy had stored the kids with the Grandparents for the night and therefore had no curfew. By a vote of three to one, Judy was selected to lead the discussion primarily because her request to Greg was what started the balls rolling (so to speak).
“First on the agenda is the voting. I have reason to believe it was rigged and I demand a recount.” She was booed down on that item and moved on to the next. “We’ve all known each other for a long time, I want to encourage everyone to speak freely and honestly. We’re not going to try and reach a consensus tonight. Whatever we decide it must be unanimous.” Unintentionally, she had set the rules that would manage the discussion. It was unanimous. The motion passed.
“Since this was my idea, I’ll go first.” Judy began. “I’ve always felt there were too many rules about sex. When I was eighteen-years-old, my mother talked to me about procreation, she was crystal clear that intercourse was recreational as well. Once the basics were explained, she focused on two things. The first was managing your own safety and the value of a prophylactic with casual sex. The second was sex should be joyful and fun. She used to say, ‘If you’re not having fun, he’s not doing it right.’ I said everybody should be honest. So, I’m going to put this out here. I have masturbated multiple times imagining myself sucking Mac’s cock.”
No one reacted except Mac. He went a bit wide-eyed, and a slight smile appeared. He was the only one who didn’t know about Judy’s fantasy.
“So, when I saw the porn video Greg rented, it struck me how erotic it would be to share Mac’s cock with my husband. And this is where my frustration with sex rules comes in. If a husband and wife find it exciting to suck a man’s cock, who the hell should have a say — except the three of them? Now my fantasy didn’t play out for an assortment of reasons. But Greg, and I think Mac also, learned a bit about their sexuality. So, my hope for tonight’s meeting is to see if we can agree on how things proceed from here.”
Linda jumped in, “Mac and Judy know how religion has impacted my sex life. I didn’t decide until very recently that my private intimacies are not the church’s business. Mac and I are now writing our own rules about what we do and who we do it with. When I was watching you two last weekend, it was pure joy to me. You both love each other… not the way you love us, but quite differently than how you feel about other male friends. My turn to be completely honest. I’m not in a place where I’m ready to watch my husband put his penis in Judy’s mouth. As a wise friend told me a few days ago, ‘not yet anyway.’ I want to add something else. My father was a philanderer and ultimately gave my mother syphilis. (Linda teared up but continued) I worry about fidelity and being safe in my relationship. How could I not?”
Mac put his hand on her shoulder, as did Judy on the other side. “I’m not going to say I’m sorry. This is the way I feel.” Everybody assured her she had nothing to think about apologizing for.
Mac took the floor. “I really support Judy’s comment about unanimity. I don’t believe myself capable of intentionally doing something that would hurt my wife. I know she was traumatized by her parent’s relationship and at our marriage I vowed to her and the other attendees it would not happen in our marriage. Now for the honesty part. I told Linda and later Greg that I had fantasized about being sexual with him. Given my wife’s family-of-origin issues, I was blown-away by her willingness to let me fulfill that fantasy. I would like to continue to explore my sexuality with Linda and Greg. But not at the expense of Linda’s concerns. I will not agree to anything that makes her uncomfortable.” Linda broke down crying at that point and ran to Mac’s arms.
“Maybe we should continue this some other time,” Linda said quietly.
“No, just give me a minute. This is not about last weekend. It’s about the messed up beliefs I grew up with. Give me a few minutes and I’ll be OK.”
“Sure, take all the time you need,” Judy said reassuringly.
Greg stood, “Who wants more wine?” Everybody raised their hands. Greg left briefly and came back with a new bottle, right out of the cooler. He got the cork out and began filling empty glasses. Everyone sat quietly drinking for several minutes.
Unexpectedly,
Linda joyfully said, “Does everybody know what pegging is?” Looking around she saw Greg and Judy slightly moving their heads up and down. “Cool! Well, Mac has agreed to try it with me. He told me I had so much fun with anal sex, that it might be something he should do.”
“Annnnnd, she’s back,” said Mac, shaking his head and looking at the patio tiles.
Judy looked at Greg, “Well that’s interesting. Isn’t it Greg?”
Greg looked at Mac and did his best imitation of Oliver Hardy from the ‘Stan and Ollie’ movie, “Well, there’s another nice mess you’ve gotten me into.”
Judy turned to Linda and kindly ask if she wished to continue. She thought for a moment and responded, “No, but thank you all for your kindness in listening to my family woes.”
Judy sincerely responded, “Thank you for trusting us to confide in.” Then to Greg, “OK Mr. Soon-to-be-Pegged, it’s your turn.”
“Thank you, Ma’am. When Judy and I exchanged vows at our wedding, we pledged to be ‘faithful’ to each other, ‘forsaking all others.’ Real men keep their word. I strive to never lie or deceive Judy and to be completely honest. I’m only human and fall short sometimes, but it’s a guiding principle in my life. This affects the four of us because what happened last weekend would not have happened if Judy and Linda had not wanted it. I know Mac would agree with me on this, no matter what we thought we wanted, permission… maybe that’s not the right word. Consent might be better. We just wouldn’t have done that behind your backs.”
Mac nodded purposefully.
“With that in mind I propose a group relationship named Closed Loop. I’ve talked a little bit to Mac and Judy about it, but not in any detail. Linda, I don’t want you to feel some big decision has been made without your permission.”
“Thank you. Mac did mention you brought the subject up with him at lunch. I don’t feel any conspiracy is afoot. Isn’t that a cool word? I saw it in a Sherlock Holmes movie.”
Everyone smiled and nodded at her attempt at humor.
“I found a definition in the Urban Dictionary, ‘CLR is an intimate relationship of mutual understanding and agreement among four individuals, usually where two couples who are married or similarly bound; where individuals may be heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual; and, where all individuals remain faithful and exclusive to each other.’ I think the way I was explaining to Mac and Judy before is more straight forward. Judy and I would continue to have sex together, Mac and Linda would continue normally with their sex life, and Mac and I would sometimes have sex. The closed loop part is none of the participants are having sex with anyone outside the circle. Linda, I believe that addresses your major concern. Doesn’t it?”
“It sounds like it deals with out and out cheating. Although I wasn’t worried particularly about that with Mac. I do like the fact that everyone is committed to the others in the loop, and it reduces the likelihood of any of us contracting an STD. But what about emotional cheating?
“I’m not claiming to have all the answers. I was trying to find something to keep some of what we’ve found, while protecting us all. We would all need to know what your concern is and then work together to resolve it. I’m not trying to sell something here or dodge your concern. I feel like I have offered a potential framework and the group needs to ‘build the house’ together, so to speak.”
Looking at Linda, Judy said, “Are you concerned literally with the depth of feeling Mac and Greg feel for each other? Or some potential decline in Mac’s affection, attention, or sexual interest?
Mac jumped in, “I think…”
“Please don’t answer a question directed at me, honey.” Turning to Judy, Linda continued, “It’s really not about the feelings the boys have for each other. I’ve already said they love each other, and I accept that. It’s the ‘declines’ you mentioned.”
Mac tried again, “It’s…”
Linda cut him off, “What if, and I mean that literally. I’m just throwing an idea out. What if we, the wives, controlled… no, that’s too strong. What about managed the sexual liaisons between the husbands for six months to a year, while we try the new relationship out? We could provide feedback about perceived changes in our relationships… I don’t know. I’m losing steam here. I’m trying to think of a way for us to feel involved, no, uh…”
Mac finally got to express a thought, “I don’t mind the use of the word ‘control.’ You two need to be able to put the brakes on if you feel our full affection, attention, or sexual interest is wavering. I’m not looking to decrease any of that. I am willing to cede control of the physical part of my relationship with Greg.”
“I have no problem with that either,” Greg agreed. “My desire would be that everyone is happy with what’s happening. ‘Unhappy wife leads to an unhappy life.’ I’m teasing you two. I really don’t feel any loss of manliness in allowing the woman I love to say, ‘no.'”
Judy turned to Linda, who spoke right up, “A year. I would like a whole year where I could say ‘not this weekend’ or even ‘this month.’ And I want to be able to exercise that choice without having to explain myself. That is control, I guess; but it would make me feel confident that things wouldn’t get out of hand. It assures me I won’t get runover or out voted. I really want this to work. I absolutely loved watching you two go at it, and I want to see more. But I’ve got to feel safe too.”
Ever the organizer, Judy said, “It sounds like we’ve made a concrete decision; maybe even two. Do we agree on the definition Greg read on what Closed Loop Relationships are?”
The other three all nodded.
“Then we have a framework, as Greg suggested. And we have two construction bosses. What’s next?”
“Secrecy,” said Mac. “It seems dangerous in this arrangement. Greg and I should always announce our plans. No secrets from our wives. That allows you to approve or not if you choose.”
“I like that,” Judy commented. “I would like to see it expanded to include Linda and I as well. If we talk about something that involves sex between you two, we should tell you about it. If we’re going to be committed to each other, we need to be honest with each other.”
“I like that Judy,” agreed Greg. “But regarding sex activity between Mac and I, are we going to make plans for approval or perform when asked?”
“That’s like that saying about donuts. Six of one kind and a half dozen of the other… right?” Linda said.
“Exactly,” Judy added. “Greg, the answer to both your scenarios is, yes. You and Mac can plan something and share with us; and Linda and I can make requests independently. Who else wants to contribute their ideas?” There was no response for a minute or so.
Ultimately it was Linda who made another contribution. “I am quite comfortable with what we’ve discussed and want to move on to some fun. But I don’t want any changes to the arrangement or decisions within the relationship made unless all four of us agree. Judy can’t give Mac and Greg permission to mess around. And no combination of three of us can change the rules.”
“Excellent point Linda.” Judy agreed. “The whole arrangement is built on trust, communication, and agreement. Is the house built?”
Everyone nodded agreement. Linda asked for a ‘group hug.’ The four of them pulled in close together and held tight. Interestingly nobody spoke and they held the hug for several minutes. Eventually, Linda broke it up by saying, “I’m ready to see some naked men.”
Judy commanded, “Off with your clothes boys and let the fun begin.”