Author’s note – I realize that my story may be frustratingly slow-paced to many readers of erotica. For me the erotic part of stories lies not in torrid descriptions of genital mashing, but in all the little bits and pieces that lead up to mashing. That said, I’m attempting to steer the story in to more overtly sexual scenes, but it keeps fighting me, slowing the pace so that all you frogs won’t even realize that you’ve been boiled! 😉 Chapters 4 & 5 published together to expedite publication and make it easier on Literotica staff.
Chapter 4
Later than evening I get a message back from Sadie telling me she’d be happy to meet, suggesting a small coffee shop near the University on Saturday. When I show up I’m wearing the romper again, this time with dark red tank top. I also am wearing the heeled sandals so that I can get used to walking in them, and after walking just a couple blocks from where I park, my balance is already improving. I order a latte and sit at a table that lets me look out on the intersection of University and 4th avenue where shoppers, students, cylclists and parents stroll bye in the afternoon sun.
The coffee shop is relatively empty and I don’t see any women in the shop who might be Sadie. I’m starting to grow a bit nervous and begin to wonder if she’s going to show up when a very pregnant woman in her mid 30s pushing a stroller rolls into the shop. She looks around, sees me, smiles and walks over.
“Austin?” She asks, her bright blue eyes are striking as is her pale complexion and fiery red hair.
I look at her, completely stunned. Not so much because of her beauty, which is breathtaking, but because she appears to be in the latest stages of her pregnancy and has a sleeping child in the stroller.
“Sadie?!” I respond, standing up to greet her.
We both smile, looking at each other in a way few others in history have ever looked at each other. She finally breaks the tension and steps into a warm, though somewhat awkward hug with her belly forcing separation between us and her 5’3″ frame so much shorter than my own.
“Can I get you something?” I ask her as she sits. Something deep inside me instantly realizes the desire to care for a woman in the midst of her pregnancy. A brotherly, no, sisterly instinct that I know for certain as as alien to me three weeks ago as the breasts on my chest are now.
“Oh, thank you. Some green tea would be wonderful.” I order and pay for the tea and return to our table, sitting across from her as she checks on the sleeping boy.
“So weren’t you expecting this, were you?” Sadie asks, pointing to her swollen belly and the boy sleeping away in his stroller.
“Never in a million years! To be honest I’m having a hard time believing you are who you claim to be.” It sounds skeptical and unwelcoming, but after the experiences of the last three weeks I’m really not wanting to get punked but some stranger, or worst yet a Wiccan.
“I thought you might say that Austin. Dr. Finch said you’d probably need some convincing – she totally reminded me how long it took me to get over this 10 years ago! So I brought you a few things. Here is my old driver’s license.” She hands me a yellowed Arizona driver’s license.
I take it from her and examine it. Pictured on the card is a sort of goofy looking young man of about 20. He has incredibly pale skin with a Jackson Pollock-esque spray of freckles across his cheeks. The ID documents that Jason Alexander McNeary was born 35 years ago on the 14th of April, weighed 200lbs and stood 5’11” tall in the year the license was issued. I look back and forth between the image and the woman in front of me. They eyes are identical as is the complexion, though Sadie’s freckles seem to have faded slightly.
“You are so much shorter!” I don’t mean to be accusatory, but it comes out that way.
“I know. If you think going though a major change like the one you went through is tough, imagine losing 8 damn inches too!” She takes the ID back, tucking it into her fashionable leather wallet.
She deposits the wallet in her purse, and then pulls a sealed envelope from it. It’s a plain white envelope with my name written on it in somewhat sloppy handwriting. “Here, this is for you to take home and read when you want to. It’s my story, starting from the evening I went out for a beer at The Shanty to the birth of Sean.” She gestures to the sleeping boy. “It’s not a very well written story, writing was never my strong suit, but it gets my story across.”
I take the envelop and slip it into my backpack – I haven’t purchased a purse yet and am still using the shabby cordura wallet I’ve had since I was 16.
She looks at me compassionately. “So Austin, how are you doing? I bet you are still overwhelmed by everything, aren’t you?”
I nod as the barista brings Sadie’s tea. “I’m ok I guess. I’m kinda surprised by how NOT angry I am, you know?” Sadie nods. “It’s also really weird that when I look at an attractive guy I feel that same flutter in my gut that I used to feel when I saw a cute girl. It’s… like a switched got flipped!”
Sadie is beaming as I say this, nodding as she listens. “Isn’t in amazing!? I literally never had a single sexual thought about a man my entire life, then I wake up after… IT happened, and all of a sudden I’m drawn to every tight pair of buns in jeans that I come across.” She blushes a bit at that.
“Do you still have that little voice in your mind, your man-brain?” I wonder if the masculine pearl-of-awareness in my mind will ever leave, hoping it won’t. It’s sort of comforting and also seems like a bit of a bullshit detector.
She looks at me a bit confused, then her eyes widen as she realizes what I’m talking about. “Oh, you mean does Jason still talk to me? You know, not in a long time, but I think deep down he is still there.” She sighs, “my life is so busy now and it’s been so long since I’ve felt unsure of myself as a woman that I think he’s just deep asleep. Though I really think having him around in my head was a godsend for me! There were so many times that I nearly got into bad situations only to be alerted by him.”
Nodding and thankful that I won’t lose that part of who I was I blurt out, “So…you’re pregnant?” in a testament to the obvious.
Sadie’s elfin face breaks into gorgeous, genuinely happy smile, “Yes, so very very pregnant and so ready to be NOT pregnant! I’m also married to a wonderful man.” She holds up her left hand, showing off a large diamond and sapphire engagement ring and simple platinum wedding ring. “We live on the east side of campus in the Sam Hughes neighborhood. I guess you could say I went ‘all in’ on my new identity. Dr. Finch says that everybody she’s talked to has bought in.”
She shifts uncomfortably on the small hard wooden seat of the cafe’s chair. “Liam knocked me up within month after I stopped taking the pill! It was the most amazing feeling – those first six months or so with Sean growing in me.” she adds wistfully.
“Holy shit…. those fucking Wiccans!” I respond. “How old were you, when…?”
She instantly knows that I’m referring to her transmogrification, not getting pregnant. “I was 24, just shy of my 25th birthday. Dr. Finch said you slept for three days? You got lucky! I slept for 5 days and lost 30lbs and those 8 inches! I couldn’t walk at all when I first woke up. The pain in my hips left me crying on the floor of my apartment.”
“Jesus. Really?”
She manages a smile, “Yep, really. I didn’t have any friends to help, so I ended up in the emergency room, and that, unfortunately resulted in a week-long stay on a psychiatric unit. To be honest, they did help me get my strength back there, and the time gave me a chance to process what happened, so I guess it wasn’t all bad.”
“When did you meet Dr. Finch?”
“Oh, the social worker at the hospital set up and appointment for me. She never really believed my story, but was concerned that I didn’t have a doctor so she did me that favor. Thankfully, Dr. Finch had already seen 5 others like us, so it didn’t take her long to figure out who I was. She was the first person I trusted after the transmogrification. I owe her so much – when she called me up telling me about another recipient of the Wiccans magic there was no way I could even conceive of not helping her and you out.” My mind catches on her saying ‘recipient’ and not ‘victim’ of the Wiccans’ magic.
She adds, “I’ve been wondering if there’d be a new batch of changelings since early this spring. She’s totally right that the the Wiccans do this like clockwork on the night of the full moon closest to the June solstice every 10years.”
“I really like her too. I guess we are lucky to have found her, huh?” I feel awkward, but I can’t help but staring at Sadie’s incredibly large belly and correspondingly large breasts that overwhelm even the striking ‘gingerness’ of her complexion.
“Yes, we really are. I heard that you are even luckier in that you have a friend who knows, and actually understands what happened?”
I nod. “Yah, Sarah and I have known each other since our first day as Freshman on campus. Honestly, if I didn’t know her I think I’d be in the nut-hatch myself.”
“Aww, that’s really wonderful. I’ve made some close friends since my change, but don’t really have any contact with anybody I knew before it happened.”
“So do you have any advice for me? I’m not sure what do do first. I’m not even sure I should do anything differently.”
Sadie reaches out, her small hand feels a bit rough, like a mom who spends far too much time cleaning things, and puts her hand on mine. “Austin, you are gorgeous and soooo tall! I’m totally jealous that you didn’t shrink like I did! Guys are going to be all over you as you start venturing out into the world in your new body and they can be relentless, even the guys with good hearts. Some of them can be both relentless and fucking ruthless. The worst of them seem to actually sense a woman’s naïveté! If you were a nice guy before this happened you may not realize just how fucking dastardly men can be. Some men that is, there are many nice guys out there too but they won’t pursue you just because they sense you are an easy target. Since we don’t have practice at figuring out guys’ true nature – we are, or at least I WAS – really vulnerable to the tricks and bullshit they practice.”
Sadie pauses, sips her tea as the trolly that serves 4th Avenue passes bye. “So my first bit of advice for you is to match a guys charms with caution. The more charming he is – the more he makes you tingle, the more cautious you should be!”
“Crap! I had no clue. It seems really difficult, and a bit lonely to be in a space like that.” I reply.
“It certainly can be.” Sadie carries on, “I tried to convince a few friends I’d know before about what happened to me but they just couldn’t deal with it and I felt abandoned. I ended up becoming quite lonely, and to be honest, quite curious as to what sex would be like as a woman. I also thought that having sex would make me feel less lonely.” a tear drips down her cheek. She quickly blots it. “Mistakes were made, many mistakes! I wish I hadn’t made them and I’m hoping you won’t have to live through what I lived through.” She looks down at her son, softly strokes the strawberry blonde hair on his head.
Her story, while familiar to me, seems so sad and so very lonely. I feel a degree of compassion for her that I’ve never felt before. “Does your husband know your story?” hoping that she’s found a confidant.
She pauses before answering, sips her tea, “I told him once but he didn’t believe me. I wanted him to believe me and tried to explain it to him again but he just pulled back from me and the relationship. I realized if I were to convince him I risked losing him, like I lost all my friends and family from before. So I gave up on telling him my story and never mentioned it again. In my experience most of the people out there,” she gestures to the street and world at large, “just can’t wrap their minds around magic like this.”
She shifts again, having never spent even five minutes around a pregnant woman before I’m becoming scared to think it could happen to me – she looks so uncomfortable. Sarah continues on after resettling on the seat, “I was far too in love with Liam to risk losing him so I just let it go. I think that, at some deep level, he does understand that I had an unbelievable transition in my life – but he never asks about my childhood, my parents, or why I don’t have friends from before age 24. I don’t think that he believes I started life as a man and lived that way for so long. So we live in the present and contemplate our future together – we aren’t big on reminiscing or discussions of personal history” Sadie looks less than happy.
“Oh, seems like him not believing you is, ummm, difficult for you?”
“Yah, I mean, of course it is. I love Liam more than anyone else in the world other than Sean.” She strokes her son’s head again as he snoozes away. “It’s difficult when one of the defining events in my life isn’t something he can help me with, let alone talk to me about. But I’ve found other ways of coping with it and we have a really amazing life together in every other respect.” She brightens at that.
“Other ways of coping?” I’m realizing that the superficial fun I’ve been having so far – shopping with Sarah and enjoying self-stimulation aren’t going to carry me though the rest of my life.
“Oh, I’m glad you asked Austin!” Sadie perks up. “So, first off I have a sort of mentor. She is almost exactly 10years older than I am and she’s a product of the Wiccans too. She’s obviously farther along in her life and I’ve been able to talk to her about stuff that comes up for me. It helps that she’s a psychologist, so she can bring a whole host of skills to bear on my problems.”
I see Sean starting to stir from his nap. “Oh, really? Umm.. could you send me her info? I think that having a few people to talk to about all this would be helpful.”
Sadie nods while opening up her phone, a moment later I see a contact card text appear in my messages from Sadie with a contact titled, Simona Petterson, Ph.D.
“How old is your son?”
“Sean was born 12months ago. And before you ask, yes, it was a vaginal birth and it was really really fucking difficult and painful. It also was the most rewarding thing I’ve ever done.” As if he’s been cued, Sean opens his bright blue eyes to the world, and Sadie picks him up from the stroller, pulls up her blouse, opens up the cup of her bra and he latches on and starts to suckle from her large, swollen nipple. “Yep, we almost had Irish twins!”
I’ve never watched a woman nurse before and I’m transfixed. Sadie continues after positioning him, “Dr. Finch says that women who are lactating usually don’t get pregnant, but everything about me and the other changelings that she’s examined and treated suggests that we are like… hyper-fertile. You really need to be careful Austin.”
I shake my head… a bit dumbfounded by the thought that I too might be as fertile as the woman sitting across from me, when three weeks ago my only concern regarding fertility was to make sure I had an unexpired condom in my wallet.
“Austin, if you learn nothing else today, you need to learn this. You are now a mature, fertile woman, and you can easily get into a situation that you are definitely not ready for! I’m walking proof of that! I got into a very unfortunate situation about 2 months after I changed – that situation required Dr Finches surgical skills. That caused a lot of very unnecessary turmoil. Do you understand?”
I’m struck, no hammered, by this statement. Sadie is telling me that she got pregnant that quickly after her change and got an abortion! “Holy crap.” I nod my understanding.
“I need to get him home and start cooking dinner Austin. I’d love to hang out and talk to you again though. You have my number, please call me if you ever ever need anything. OK?”
I look away from the feeding child and at Sadie’s beautiful, motherly face. “Ok. I will.”
She pulls Sean away from her breast, covering herself quickly with a practiced touch. “I’ll leave you with one final bit of advice. Choose a new name for yourself soon. It really helped me start to internalize my identity, and it’s also just a lot more practical – you won’t have to answer so many questions about why you have a guy’s name. And consider having Dr. Finch put you on the pill, if you are even half as sexually motivated as I was…” she pauses and looks around, then leans in to me, “you are probably CRAVING dick right now!”
I’m not sure I’m craving it, but the fantasies and longing to be with a guy have been starting to flood my awareness more and more intrusively every day.
Sadie stands after strapping Sean into his seat. She whispers goodbye as she hugs me and turns to leave, then I hear her exclaim, “Oh shit… I almost forgot!” She pulls out a brown paper lunch sack. “Here, this is for you. Dr. Finch said you are almost three weeks out and you’ll be needing these soon.” She leans in closely, whispering into my ear, “I didn’t use tampons until about a year after. So I just gave you enough pads to get through a day or two. If you are like me, your cycle will be like clockwork every four weeks! There’s also a few hundred dollars in cash in there – it seems that the Wiccans only pick on the poor and buying a new wardrobe isn’t cheap. Remember to pay it forward, ok?”
Watching her sort of waddle down University boulevard towards campus, I’m struck by the utterly surreal nature of being a freshly minted woman standing in a cafe in a cute green romper wearing pink Dr Martens while literally holding the bag.