September Sunsets

The warm Summer weather continued into September and Neil invited Saoirse to join him and his friends on their annual September surfing trip to the West coast. They rented an Air B&B near the beach and Neil picked Saoirse up to make the 4 hour journey there together.

“How come you’ve not got your shorts on?” Neil asked as he pulled up outside her flat and Saoirse got into the car in jeans, canvas shoes and a t-shirt.

Saoirse leaned over to kiss him but stopped short. “Oh hello Saoirse, how are you?” she said with a smile.

Neil pursed his lips. “Yeah, sorry.” he said timidly. “Hello Saoirse, how are you?” he asked as if he just seen her.

Saoirse kissed him. “Good, thank you. How are you?” she asked, smiling at him and thinking how attractive he looked in his t-shirt, shorts, flip-flops and dark aviator sunglasses. “Apart from hot.” she gave him a flirty smile.

“Fantastic!” he exaggerated. Saoirse could tell he was excited and slightly hyper about the trip. “Go and get changed into your shorts, if you want.” he said. Saoirse shook her head. “I’ll wait, there’s plenty of time.” he said, calmly. Saoirse shook her head again. “Are you sure?” he asked. “It’s really hot and we’ll be in the car for a fair few hours.” he said, looking at her puzzled.

“No, it’s fine.” Saoirse said, sitting back in her seat. Neil stroked her thigh and leaned over to kiss her.

“Did you get your hair cut?” Neil asked, lifting his sunglasses up and looking at her. Saoirse nodded. “It’s gorgeous. You’re gorgeous.” he smiled, kissing her again.

“Thank you!” Saoirse beamed. “Thought I’d treat myself; went to the hairdresser and salon and got some treatments.” she said, wiggling her fingers to show off her freshly manicured hands.

“Good, you deserve it. You never treat yourself but you should.” he said while Saoirse fastened her seatbelt.

“Can I get that in writing?” she teased.

They made the journey in good time and got to the Air B&B in the early evening just as Mike, Jay & Emma arrived. They drew straws to see who would get the ensuite bedroom with Saoirse and Neil being the lucky winners. They unpacked their belongings and headed to the supermarket for groceries and alcohol. That evening they ate dinner cooked by Saoirse and Jay, played drinking games and cards and then Saoirse brought out her game of Cards Against Humanity.

“I know you and Saoirse don’t know each other yet Em so can I just apologise in advance for what you might witness.” Neil said to Emma, sniggering as he glanced at Saoirse.

“Ehh, fuck off!” Saoirse said playfully, looking at him and flicking the V sign. Jay laughed and nodded at Neil to show his agreement with Saoirse. “She’s had the misfortune of spending time with you so this is a bit of light relief!” she joked, nudging him with her foot as they sat side by side on the sofa. “This is a bonding experience!” she giggled, smiling at Emma who nodded and raised her glass in agreement.

“Aw man, this’ll be fun! Sha-Sha, remember last time we played this?” Mike laughed. Saoirse put her finger up to her mouth in a Shhh gesture and winked at Mike.

They continued drinking and played the game until the early hours of the morning. They laughed so hard that their faces and stomachs ached. They had to open the patio doors to let some fresh air in cos it got so warm that Mike had a headache and Saoirse thought she might vomit.

Eventually they all went to bed. Neil lay in bed scrolling through his phone while Saoirse got changed and got into bed. Neil lifted his left arm as she lay down, she fit right into the crook of it, resting her head on his shoulder. “Mmmm you’ve been going hard at the gym.” she said, stroking her hand up Neil’s chest and shoulder.

Neil took a deep breath, set his phone down on the night stand and shifted towards her in the bed. He turned his head so their faces were inches apart and started kissing her passionately. “All that flexing I’ve been doing hasn’t been lost on you!” he said.

Saoirse giggled, stroking his beard and looking in his eyes. “No it hasn’t, I can tell how much you enjoy seeing your muscles flex, especially when you’re on top.” she said quietly. Neil’s eyes flickered with desire and he kissed her hard, rolling them over until he was on top of her. Saoirse broke their kiss. “IT’S SO QUIET!” she whispered. “THEY’LL ALL HEAR US!” her eyes widened.

“So we’ll just have to be quiet for a change!” he whispered with a grin on his face. Neil kissed her passionately then quickly kissed down to her neck and Saoirse started to pant.

“I can’t! Oh my god, Neil. I can’t when you’re kissing me there!” she squirmed in a panicked whisper, running her hand up his back.

Neil stopped and smirked at her. “It’s OK, calm down.” he whispered. He kissed her and their tongues caressed each other in soft strokes. Saoirse turned her body forcing Neil onto his back again and straddled him. She pulled up her pyjama top and he threw it on the floor then his hands quickly found her waistband as they kissed. Saoirse moved his hands up her back again then continued kissing him and caressing his face, neck, arms and chest. He kept working his hands down towards her pyjama shorts and Saoirse kept moving them back up her body again. She felt his cock hard against her ass and it bounced as they kissed and caressed each other more urgently.

Saoirse started to kiss and caress her way down his body. He tugged at her pyjama shorts and when she looked up at him, he tilted his head signaling her to move back up the bed to him. She sat up on her knees and leaned over him. He tried to slide her pyjama shorts down but she grasped the waistband with her left hand and shook her head. “I want you in my mouth.” she whispered before kissing him. His brow furrowed and he exhaled loudly.

Saoirse kissed and caressed her way back down his body again and Neil squirmed. “Are you ticklish again?” she whispered, smiling and looking at him. He gave her a nod, a pleading look on his face. “Don’t worry, I won’t tickle you any more.” she whispered.

She crawled down between his legs and stroked her hands up his thighs placing soft kisses up his thighs and in the creases of his groin. Her fingertips softly stroked his balls and taint. They maintained eye contact and Neil reached down to stroke her hair as she lifted his cock in her hand and slowly pushed back his foreskin. Neil let out a long sigh as she gently teased the tip with the flat of her tongue before slowly gliding her mouth down over his cock. She looked at him as she stroked her hand up and down his cock while her mouth moved up and down, caressing it with her tongue.

Neil panted and gasped, caressed her hair and face and reached down to squeeze her right breast and watched her as she sucked him. She massaged the base of his cock and where it joined his balls gently but firmly with her thumb. She maintained eye contact with him and worked slowly, building up her pace as his breathing got heavier. She felt him getting close.

“Stop, stop!” he whispered quickly. Saoirse stopped and leaned up over him, rubbing their noses together and smiling at him. She looked in his eyes as he breathed heavily. She kissed him in short, soft kisses on his face and he caressed down her back and over her ass, hooking his thumbs in her waistband and raising his eyebrows at her. “Can I take these off you?” he whispered.

She shook her head gently and smiled. “Let me focus on you tonight.” she whispered.

Neil gazed at her and stroked his hands up her back. “I can’t complain about that!” he whispered and smiled before kissing her hard.

Saoirse slowly worked her way back down his body, gently stroking and kissing his neck, collar bones, chest, nipples, lower stomach, thighs, balls and taint as she maintained as much eye contact as possible with him. She began firmly stroking his cock with her hand. Neil gasped and breathed out a long, slow breath then reached down to stroke her face. “Don’t swallow until I tell you.” Neil whispered.

Saoirse nodded. “I know you love watching it.” she gave him a feverish look and he licked his lips as he traced hers with his thumb. She looked him in the eye as she took his thumb into her mouth and sucked gently while running her tongue around it. Neil groaned. “Shhh!” she said quickly grasping his wrist and pulling his hand away from her face. He shook his head but she couldn’t tell if it was to apologise or say that he didn’t care.

As she continued stroking his cock, she kneeled down and gently teased the head of his cock with her tongue again until she took his cock into her mouth and sucked it, gaining momentum. Neil gasped and panted and ran his hand through her hair. She felt his body tense and his hand grasped her hair, she eased the intensity of her mouth and gently caressed his frenulum with her tongue. “Aw fuck yeah!” Neil hissed. He grasped her hand on his cock and guided her to move slower. She looked up at him and watched his face contort and he panted heavily, trying not to groan while she felt his cock spurt in her mouth. Neil breathed heavily and Saoirse gently let go of his cock. She sat up, stroked up his thighs and torso and leaned up over Neil, gazing at him with a small smile on her face and waiting for him to recover slightly. He wiped his brow with the back of his forearm, exhaled gently and opened his eyes, smiling when he saw her above him. She tilted her head and opened her mouth slightly, showing him. He gave her a coy smile. “Kiss me,” he whispered. She kissed him with a closed mouth. “Now swallow it.” he whispered. She smirked at him and swallowed slowly then opened her mouth again to show him it was now empty. “Hmmm. You’re one saucepot, Saoirse Evans.” he groaned quietly, gazing at her. Saoirse giggled and Neil giggled at her giggling. He kissed her hard. “Come here ’til I see you!” he whispered playfully, wrapping his arms around her. Saoirse lay down, rested her head on his left shoulder again and they gazed at each other. “That was fucking awesome!” Neil groaned quietly, sighing out a contented deep breath, running his left hand through her hair and stroking her left shoulder with his right hand.

Saoirse gave him a wide smile. “Good,” she replied, stroking his beard. “I thought that too.” she whispered. Neil smiled and kissed her softly, sighing as he fought to keep his eyes open. Saoirse laughed quietly. “Are you sleepy, Neil?” she whispered. He opened his eyes wide, nodded and smiled at her. She reached over and turned off the lamp on Neil’s night stand. “I love you,” she whispered, kissing him softly. “Sleep tight.”

He cocooned her in his arms and she rested her head on his chest. “Love you too, Saoirse.” he whispered leaning down to kiss her head before falling asleep.

Saoirse woke in the dark, confused. She fumbled for her phone on the nightstand. “6:30am?” she mumbled. “I’m gonna be late!” She jumped and gasped loudly.

Neil woke with a start then put his arm heavily over her, pulling her against him. “Annual leave. Go back to sleep.” he whispered, falling back into a deep sleep with his body spooning hers.

A couple of hours later they woke and got ready to leave the house. “Well, first day of surf school. How are you feeling Saoirse?” asked Jay as he and Neil packed up Neil’s car with their boards.

“Ehhhh… nervous!” she laughed awkwardly. “Maybe I’ll feel better once I get my wetsuit and board.” she said.

“You’ll be great!” Jay said, walking round the car to put his arm round her. “Just relax and have fun.” he said sincerely.

Neil glanced at Jay. “And we’ll see you at lunch time so you can show us the biggest wave you can get!” Neil teased. Jay shook his head and Neil laughed.

“Don’t laugh, you’re supposed to be encouraging!” she whined. “It’s only a 3-day surf school so I’ll not be up to much.”

“I am encouraging you, I feel like a proud dad!” Jay said excitedly. “It’s that fucker being mean.” he said lunging at Neil and they play wrestled.

They dropped Saoirse off at the beach for her lesson then drove a couple of miles further down the beach where they surfed all morning. Saoirse had an enjoyable but challenging first surf lesson, getting used to how to maintain her posture and position herself on her board, and started learning how to enter the water and paddle on the board without falling in. She was glad the lessons were only 3 hours long because she was exhausted afterwards while she sat on the fence above the beach waiting on Neil to collect her.

They went back to their Air B&B, showered and prepared lunch to eat in the garden. Emma and Saoirse chatted while they set the table and waited on the guys making food. They talked about their jobs, their hobbies, their families and discovered they had mutual friends. Then the conversation turned to relationships.

“How long have you and Neil been together now?” Emma asked.

“Ermmm…9… well, nearly 10 months just.” Saoirse replied. “Since the start of the year.”

“You’d think you’d been together for a lot longer!” Emma said.

“Really?” Saoirse asked, giving Emma a puzzled look. “I think we’re still in the honeymoon period a bit.” she shrugged timidly.

Emma shook her head and her long, dark dreadlocks danced round her thin frame. “The two of you have this telepathic thing going on: alllll the eye contact and the little subtle touches on each other.” she smiled.

Saoirse blushed and raised her eyebrows. “Oh right. Sometimes, I just want to crack open his head and look inside to understand what he’s thinking.” she laughed nervously. “Normally I find it easy to read people but in relationships I get a bit…lost or something.” Saoirse shrugged and smiled awkwardly. “I get these moments of self-doubt that spiral into an existential crisis for no reason.” she looked at the ground.

“You’re very intuitive, Saoirse. You’re an intuitive empath, don’t underestimate yourself.” Emma said. “I feel like I knew you in a previous life. You exude this reassuring aura, like you just know things, you FEEL on a whole other level.” Emma said, smiling. Saoirse smiled, not sure what to say. “My girlfriend met you at a party at Jay’s house a couple of months ago?” she asked. “She came home and said ‘I met Neil’s new girlfriend and she’s so lovely!’. I was jealous I hadn’t got to meet you that night!” Emma laughed.

“Oh yes! Jo?” Saoirse asked. Emma nodded and smiled. “She was leaving not long after we got there so I only met her briefly but she’s so funny!” Saoirse smiled.

“Yep, that’s my Jo.” Emma said. “You wouldn’t think we’re actually a couple, we’ve hardly been to anything together this year. Opposing work schedules and families and all that.” Emma made a face. “But yes, she was right. You are lovely!” she smiled and nodded at her. Saoirse smiled. “And dude’s pretty smitten!” Emma smiled. Saoirse’s eyes widened then forehead wrinkled in thought.

“Yeah so, you know how he doesn’t waste time on anything he’s not immediately interested in, just dismisses it right away?” Emma asked. Saoirse rolled her eyes and nodded. “Well…” Emma held her palm out towards Saoirse. “he invited you here to September Surfing with us which is his litmus test!” Emma smiled and touched Saoirse’s shoulder. “That’s kind of a big deal. Also, he’s affectionate with you in front of us – really big deal. I’m telling you, dude is smitten!” she raised her eyebrows and nodded.

“Oh, ok then. Thanks.” Saoirse said, with a shy smile. “Like I said, self- doubt!” she giggled.

“His ex was quite standoffish, she never wanted to join in with anything we did. She was too much of a princess.” she rolled her eyes. “So precious!” Emma mocked. “Total fucking snob!” Emma whispered behind her hand to Saoirse as Neil, Mike and Jay brought out the food and drinks to the patio table. Saoirse nodded once and bit her lip to hide a giggle. “So you’re a breath of fresh air!” Emma said softly to Saoirse, patting her shoulder as she smiled and nodded.

“What are you two talking about?” asked Neil, setting the plates down on the table.

“You, darling. Sit down.” Emma said gleefully to Neil. Neil pretended to run away from the table. They all laughed. “What did you think of him when you first met?” she asked Saoirse as Neil sat beside her at the table. “Do you remember the first time you met?” she asked.

Saoirse and Neil looked at each other. Saoirse shook her head while Neil said “Yes.” Neil feigned outrage. “You don’t remember the first time we met?” Neil asked, holding his hand against his chest. “But you remember everything else that’s happened to you since the beginning of time!” he jested. The others chuckled.

“I remember the first time I introduced myself to you but I’m not sure that’s the first time we MET.” Saoirse said, thinking. “In the kitchen, with the milk.” she said.

Neil smiled and nodded. “Yeah that’s what I was thinking about.”

“I think if I hadn’t introduced myself to you then, you’d just never have spoken to me, you weirdo!” she teased.

“Cos after that was the time you got into the lift when I was in it… sorry, I mean RAMMED YOURSELF into the lift as the doors were closing. I thought there was some sort of emergency and there you were carrying a big heavy box!” she laughed.

Neil nodded then shook his head laughing as he remembered it. “Just didn’t want to miss the lift…” he said shrugging and looking down.

“Neil would never miss an opportunity to ram himself into anything…yooooo!” Mike quipped. They chuckled.

“And you work with all of them?” Emma asked Saoirse. They all agreed.

“Me, Saoirse and Mike all worked in the same place until about…5 years ago?” Jay said.

“Yeah, until you crossed over to the dark side and moved departments to your fancy new building.” Saoirse teased.

“Curiosity killed the cat though, didn’t it Saoirse?” Jay countered. “Just as I got transferred back to her building she moved jobs over to my building. By then he was there…about a year or so was it loverboy?” Jay asked Neil.

Neil shook his head and laughed dismissively. “Yeah, they needed a world class engineer.” Neil joked, smoothing his hands down his t-shirt. “And Mike’s just part of the furniture.” Neil laughed.

“Look, someone has to do some work and run the place while you’re all moving jobs and hooking up with each other!” Mike said. They all laughed.

“Emma went to uni with my brother,” Jay said to Saoirse. “who said ‘you should meet my brother, he’s into surfing!’ so that’s how we met Emma and Jo.” Jay said.

“Oh I see!” Saoirse smiled. “I didn’t realise that was Emma’s Jo we met at Jay’s birthday.” she said to Neil, who nodded.

They finished their lunch and walked into the little town to look at the shops. They separated out, Mike and Jay got distracted in one of the surf shops, Saoirse found a cute gift shop, Neil sought out extras for his DSLR and Emma was happily accosted by the owner of a vegan health and well-being store.

Saoirse enjoyed browsing the shops the whole way along the street then sat on a bench at the top of the street, looking down through the town. Neil spotted her and crossed the road. “Hello hot stuff!” Neil said in his sultry voice as he sat down beside her on the bench and slid his arm along the back of it.

“Talking to yourself again?” Saoirse teased, leaning in to kiss him. “Did you get some new stuff for your camera?” she asked, nodding towards the bag in his hand.

“New lens.” he replied. “The others are going back to the beach to catch more waves, do you fancy being my ‘photographer’s assistant’?” Neil asked. Saoirse agreed. They walked back to the Air B&B holding hands and chatting, Saoirse got changed and Neil drove them to the beach. “Ooh you’ve got your shorts on, Saoirse. Very nice.” he said as they got out of the car.

“Do I look OK?” she asked, nervously.

“Yes, of course!” he smiled. “You’re gorgeous.” he kissed her. “Let me take your picture.” he said. Saoirse blushed and shrugged. “Don’t worry, I don’t mean right now. I prefer candid shots.” he put his arm around her. “I’m just asking your permission.” he said, smiling at her.

Saoirse laughed and hugged him round the waist. “Permission to take photos of me when I’m not looking? Yeah, go on then.” They sat on rocks near the top of the beach while Neil took some photos of the beach and the sea. Then they made their way down on to the beach. “Slow down, long legs!” Saoirse gasped. “I’m going to fall!” she said, clasping Neil’s hand tightly while he led them quickly down the sand dune. Neil turned round swiftly, lifted her in a fireman’s lift and ran/slid the rest of the way down the dunes with Saoirse shrieking and clinging on to him as he laughed his cheeky chuckle. “NEIL YOU MANIAC!” Saoirse screeched as he set her down on the sand at the bottom. She caught her breath and clasped his hand with both of hers as they walked along the beach.

They located Jay, Mike and Emma in the water and sat down further along the beach so Neil could take more photos. “Are you alright?” Neil asked, looking out to sea through the lens of his camera. Saoirse hummed in agreement. “Sure about that?” Neil asked.

“Yeah, why?” Saoirse asked, looking round at him.

Neil put down his camera and looked at her. “You’re not usually this quiet.” he said softly. “You seem uptight.”

“Do you mean cos I didn’t want to have sex last night?” she asked.

“No, not at all.” Neil shook his head, furrowing his brow as he thought. “Why do you say that…?” he asked.

“This is embarrassing.” Saoirse said, looking down. Neil turned his body towards her. “So I got a new bikini wax and I think the wax was too hot. I mean my skin is sensitive anyway but… it’s a bit red and sore.” she said and glanced up to see him looking at her.

“I just thought you didn’t fancy it. Nothing wrong with that.” he shook his head and stroked her hand with his fingers. “Or maybe you had your period and felt uncomfortable cos we aren’t at home.” he shrugged.

Saoirse swallowed hard and looked down at her hands. “Well, not exactly. Sort of…but…” Saoirse stumbled over her words. Neil took a deep breath and Saoirse looked up to see him staring at her. “So you know I have the coil?” she asked. Neil frowned and nodded. “And that I’ve been bleeding recently?” she said. Neil nodded again. “Well, that’s not supposed to happen. My periods stopped when I got the coil put in. It isn’t just for contraception, because I have…” she stopped and sighed. “I don’t know if you even want to know this…” she said, looking at him with an embarrassed smile.

“Yes, tell me. It’s important.” Neil said reassuringly, stroking her shoulder.

Just then Emma arrived, interrupting them. “The guys were just saying we should stay here for the sunset and then get food later on?” she asked.

Neil and Saoirse looked at each other and nodded. “Yeah, do you fancy a cuppa now?” Neil asked them.

“Yeah, that’d be good. There’s a little horse box cafe up the hill and along the road that does hot drinks and maybe ice creams.” Emma pointed back up the sand dunes.

“Yeah? Fancy a poke, Saoirse?” Neil asked with a chuckle, looking at Saoirse. She laughed and agreed. “Ok, Saoirse and I’ll go and get something…ehh…2 teas, a coffee, whatever we’re having and 5 ice creams if they sell them?” Neil asked, looking at Emma who nodded. “See you in about 20 minutes.”

Neil got up and reached out his arm to Saoirse, pulling her to stand up and they headed back towards the sand dunes. “Sorry we got interrupted there.” Neil said as they got to the top of the sand dunes. He squeezed Saoirse’s hand in his and led her over to sit on the rocks. “Tell me what’s happening.” he said, looking at her with a softness in his face.

Saoirse put her hand on his thigh and smiled shyly. “Maybe it would be better later on?” she asked.

“They can wait,” Neil said, gesturing towards the beach. Saoirse looked him in the eyes and grasped at his t-shirt. “But yeah, later if you’d feel more comfortable.” he said.

Saoirse put her arms around his waist and hugged him tightly, sighing with relief. “Thanks Neil.” she whispered. He leaned down and kissed her. They sat in silence for a moment before making their way towards the kiosk and bringing back hot drinks to Neil’s friends on the beach.

They watched the sunset all together on the beach, mostly in silence. Neil and Jay took photographs. Saoirse felt so peaceful, the sound of the waves and the fresh air were so calming. The sunset was beautiful and she enjoyed watching it with Neil and watching how much he appreciated it. She stroked his back and he lifted his arm to put it round her, hugging her to him and kissing her softly on the lips. “Ok?” he whispered, looking in her eyes. Saoirse nodded and smiled warmly at him.

Once the sun set they made their way home via the takeaway to get fish and chips for dinner then they gathered around the table in the kitchen of the Air B&B to eat together and review the day. It had been a successful first day of their September Surfing trip.

After they ate their fish & chips they scattered around the house; Neil disappeared upstairs, Mike worked on his board by the patio doors in the kitchen, Saoirse curled herself into the armchair and listened to Jay and Emma debating some controversial subject together on the sofa.

The day was catching up with Saoirse and just as she felt herself about to fall asleep, Neil appeared quietly by the arm of the armchair dressed for the outdoors, peering over her. She looked up at him and he tilted his head towards the door. She got up and stretched standing beside him. “I’ve got your coat.” he said softly and nodded towards his arm. He stood by the kitchen door and waited for her to go and put her warmer clothes and shoes on. “We’re taking the new lens out to meet the stars.” Neil said.

“Ok!” Jay and Emma said in unison.

“Where are you headed?” Mike asked.

“Not too far, just up to the Point. It’s a clear night.” Neil replied. “Break her in gently.”

“The lens or Saoirse?” Mike asked. Neil laughed. “Sha-Sha?” Mike shouted across the kitchen. “Your man here is taking you to the premier local dogging spot, do you know about this?” he shouted to Saoirse.

Saoirse walked back into the kitchen and Neil held out her coat helping her put it on. “Do YOU know about this, Mikey?” Saoirse asked.

“Probably best not to ask, he’s a dirty dog himself.” Neil said, pretending to kick something at Mike. Mike stuck his tongue out and made a heavy panting noise. “Right, we’re away.” Neil said, carrying his camera bag and putting his hand on Saoirse’s lower back as he guided her out into the hallway. “It’s NOT a dogging spot, by the way.” he said quietly to her as they walked to the front door. “Well, not as far as I know!”

“Careful he doesn’t make a move on you, Sha-Sha!” Mike shouted with a laugh.

“Mike, would you ever shut the fuck up!” hissed Emma. “Enjoy folks!” she called after them.

Saoirse and Neil drove to the lookout point and got out of the car. Saoirse walked over onto the grass in front of the car and gasped looking up at the clear black sky covered in stars that stretched out over the forest in the valley down below them. “Wow! Oh my god, look at all the stars! Oh my god it’s so pretty!” she gasped, clutching her arms to her chest and looking around. “I feel like I’m gonna cry!” she said with an embarrassed giggle as her voice wobbled. Neil turned the side lights on the car, took out his camera and started snapping photos of her. She took a deep breath and cleared her throat. “It almost doesn’t look real, more like a painting. And look at the moon! It’s so bright.” she called out into the darkness.

Neil turned off the car lights and walked up on to the grass behind her. “Do you know what phase that is?” Neil asked.

Saoirse glanced briefly round at him, winced and shook her head. “My 3rd year Science teacher Mr Walsh would be so disappointed…” she said.

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell him. It’ll be our secret.” Neil teased. “I’ll give you a clue: it’s a waning…”

“Ermmm…something to do with a monkey?” she asked, squinting as she thought.

“A monkey?” Neil laughed. “Nah, waning gibbous!” he announced.

“I knew it was something to do with a monkey!” Saoirse protested. “Gibbous…gibbon!” she shrugged.

“A gibbon isn’t a monkey, it’s an ape!” Neil replied.

“Is it? Oh, well, close. I was always better at English than Science!” she giggled. “Waning gibbous sounds like an insult though, doesn’t it?” she asked, looking round at him as he moved beside her. “Like something you’d call Mike if you bumped into him when you were out at the premier local dogging site!” she said with a straight face.

“Fuck sake, Saoirse!” Neil laughed loudly. Saoirse smiled and stuck her tongue out at him. “You’re funny!” he said, wrapping his right arm round her shoulders and squeezing her against him. “Do you want to have a go with the DSLR?” he asked. Saoirse agreed and Neil put the strap over her neck, handed her the camera and stood back. “Be careful. You wouldn’t think it but it’s heavier than it looks.” he warned. She gave him a look that, even in the dark, let him know to shut up.

She lifted it and looked through the lens, snapping a few pictures of the star-filled sky and the moon shining on the tree tops before letting the camera hang round her neck. “It really is just like a big blanket of stars over us. Look there’s the Plough… and there’s… is that Pegasus?” she asked, pointing up. Neil agreed. “Did you know the word ‘constellation’ comes from Latin meaning ‘set of stars’?” she asked without waiting for an answer. “‘Constellation’ sounds much more elegant, don’t you think?” she cooed with contentment. “Especially for something so stunning.” Neil hummed in agreement, hugged her against him, wrapping his arms round her waist from behind and rested his chin on her head, relishing these moments between them. Saoirse sighed as they looked out at the stars. “It’s so beautiful and peaceful. It makes me feel so small.” she said.

Neil chuckled to himself. “I’m sorry if this is news to you, honeybunch but you’re already really small.” Neil said softly, squeezing her round the waist and kissing her head.

Saoirse sighed a quiet laugh. “Haha! Yes, Big Bird, I know. I just mean…look at it! Look how vast it is.” she said, clasping his arms and looking up at the sky. “And this is only the tiny corner of the universe that WE can see right now.”

“Yeah, we don’t get to appreciate anything like this do we, us city folks. Now you understand why I love getting away from it all to see this.” he said softly. They stood in silence for a few moments gazing out over the valley. “I’ve got a poem for you.” Neil said confidently, standing up straight. Saoirse looked up at him. “Now, I didn’t write it. It’s by a poet called ‘Martin’ but I’ll do my best dramatic interpretation of it.” he said. He pulled her closer against him and rested his chin on her head again. He cleared his throat in an exaggerated and comical way then started “LOOK, at the stars. LOOK, how they shine for you and everything you do yeah. They were all…”

He felt Saoirse giggling. “Is this ‘Martin’ Chris Martin from Coldplay by any chance?” she interrupted gently.

“Oh do you know of him?” Neil asked in a playful voice.

“Yes, I particularly like this song they do called Yellow. Have you heard it?” she teased back.

“Hmm not sure I have,” he joked, tickling her briefly. “but I think those words are true tonight.” he said sincerely.

Saoirse smiled and turned round to face him. He reached down, lifted her up and Saoirse wrapped her legs round his waist. “Watch the camera!” she warned. He kissed her in a flurry of short, sloppy kisses, the bristles of his beard grazing her skin, before he put her back down on the ground and she hugged him round the waist. “It’s so damp out here, I wish it was more crispy autumnal weather.” she shivered. “I love hearing the wind through the trees though, it’s my favorite sound. Can you hear it?” she asked. Neil hummed in agreement as he rubbed his hands up and down her back. “It’s called psithurisum.”

“What is it?” he asked.

“Psith-ur-ism.” she repeated in syllables. “There’s a silent ‘P’ at the start.” she said.

“I love that you know the word for your favorite sound. Or that there IS a word for your favorite sound!” Neil said with a thoughtful, caring smile on his face.

“There’s a word for nearly everything; all the things you’re not even sure how to describe: feelings, sounds, phenomena. Language is so beautiful and it gives us so many tools that we don’t even have the capability to realise we can use.” she said. “Which is such a shame on us.”

“Fucking hell, I love you.” Neil sighed. Saoirse looked up at him and smiled, her eyes shone in the moonlight. “I’ve never met anyone who can express themselves like you can.” he said. “What you said just then…in a nutshell, that’s why you’re so good at your job.” he said. “The way your brain works and the way you use words, it’s poetic.”

“Thanks,” she said shyly. “Love you too.” she stood up on her tiptoes and kissed him. “I’d give ‘Martin’ a run for his money then?” she joked.

Neil laughed and nodded. “You’re properly shivering now, let’s get back in the car and I’ll crank up the heat.” he said.

As they got into the car Neil reached into the back seat, bringing out a blanket and lying it across Saoirse’s lap. “Did you bring a flask of tea as well?” Saoirse asked. “Or is that poor dogging etiquette?” she giggled. Neil turned on the heater and the light in the car, sighed a laugh, shook his head and looked at her.

“I know it’s not the ideal place,” he said, gesturing to the car. “But do you want to finish what you were trying to tell me at the beach earlier?” he asked, lifting both of her freezing cold hands in his and rubbing them. “It usually heats up pretty quickly in here, by the way.” he said about the car.

“Yeah, if that’s OK with you?” she asked timidly. Neil nodded. “Tell me to stop if you get grossed out or anything.” she said. Neil shook his head dismissively. “Ok so…ehhm. This is kinda information that leads into information that leads into information.” she mumbled. Neil nodded. “I have PCOS which is Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. So I get cysts on my ovaries, my periods are all over the place, I have acne and excess hair on my body, I have a hard time keeping my weight stable…” she said as quickly as she could, looking at Neil who stared at her but didn’t react or say anything.

She took a deep breath. “A couple of years ago I was bleeding really heavily and irregularly so I had a surgery called a D & C to basically scrape out the lining of my womb and then also got the coil put in.” Neil winced and nodded. “It went well but the results came back from the lab as abnormal which can indicate pre-cancerous cells. The surgeon said it was OK and they just monitored me every 6 months with a scan and blood tests. The coil was doing a good job of keeping the lining of my womb thin so I had no periods at all.” she said, looking at him. Neil nodded and she could see his mind whirring.

Neil turned the heat down and shuffled closer to her in the seat. “After 2 years I started to have bleeding again so I had scans, bloods, a camera investigation, a cyst excised on my ovary and biopsies taken of my womb.” Saoirse said. Neil rubbed his forehead with his hand and swallowed hard. “The results came back normal but the lining of my womb is a bit thicker than they would prefer.” she paused. “So this last 10 months when I’ve been bleeding it hasn’t been what they call a ‘true period’, it’s caused by the lining getting thicker.” she said, looking nervously at him.

“OK, right…OK…wait…all that, the camera, the cyst and the biopsies,” he winced. “That’s all happened since we’ve been together?” he asked, looking at her with his mouth open. She nodded nervously, looking at him. “Ah…WOW. Ah…OK. I don’t really know what to say.” he said slowly. They sat in silence for a long time, Saoirse looked between Neil’s face and their hands in her lap and Neil stared at their hands and fidgeted with the zip on her coat with his right hand. “How come you’ve never mentioned anything about it before?” he asked, eventually, his voice faltering.

“Well…” she shrugged. “I didn’t know how things were going to go with us.” She hesitated. “We wouldn’t have even called it a relationship yet at the time, it was right at the start and I thought it might be a bit much if I told you about the history.” she smiled shyly at him. “Never mind what was happening then. Especially ‘cos it’s gynae stuff…but also, I didn’t know what the investigations were going to show.” she said softly. “I didn’t want to freak you out until it was necessary and we knew each other better!” she laughed nervously. “There’s still time to run away if you want!” she joked.

Neil frowned at her, shook his head and leaned in to stroke her face and kiss her. “So what happens now?” he asked. She looked at him, almost surprised at his concern.

“Well, it’s good news that the results came back normal so no cancerous cells were found.” she smiled. “I kinda knew it was OK cos it took over 8 weeks for the results. Whereas the first time it only took 2 weeks, if that.” Neil squeezed her hand. “I got a letter yesterday and a phone call from the surgeon before you picked me up to say they want to do another D & C surgery and replace the coil in the next few months.” she smiled and sighed with relief.

“Hang on, so you have to have the scraping thing done again?” Neil asked, putting his hand over his eyes and cringing.

Saoirse looked at him. “Yes, just as a precaution but then hopefully that’s it until I need my coil changed in 5 years.” she smiled and nodded reassuringly.

“5 years? OK.” he looked overloaded with information. They sat in silence again.

“I know we haven’t spoken seriously about ‘the future’, I mean it’s still early days but we’re not young’uns, are we?” Saoirse asked, trying to gauge his reaction. She took a slow, deep breath. “So I guess that leads on to the kids talk?” she asked, nervously. Neil raised his eyebrows. “PCOS affects fertility and being 37 I’m already ‘old’ in a reproductive sense.” Neil looked alarmed. “Just putting it out there, even before any of this I never wanted to have kids and that hasn’t changed.” she said quickly, trying to read his reaction.

“Suits me down to the ground!” he said as he held his hands up in front of him. “I’m nearly 43 and I enjoy my sleep.” he said softly. “Plus you’ve seen how crazy my nephews are!” he laughed.

“Are you sure? I don’t want you to downplay it because of what I’ve just told you.” Saoirse said.

“Saoirse, if I wasn’t sure, I’d tell you. You know me well enough now to know I wouldn’t bullshit you about this.” he said sternly. “Honestly.” he said with a reassuring smile.

“The coil is used for contraception so we’re good.” she smiled quickly at him. “And I can keep it right through the menopause since it’s used as HRT, I just have to get it changed every 5 years until then.” she nodded.

Neil sat back in his seat and leaned his head back, exhaling loudly. “Wow Saoirse. I can’t believe…how did you…” he shook his head. “That’s so much to take in. Sorry.” he said, putting his hands over his face.

Saoirse bit her lip nervously. “I’m sorry to tell you all that in one go, Neil.” she said softly. “I wasn’t sure how to…I didn’t plan to unburden myself…or burden you with it,” she sighed an awkward laugh. “I didn’t want to overshadow or ruin the trip, a lot just happened all at once…” she said.

“Ruin the trip? Nah!” Neil talked over her, throwing his hands on his lap. “Don’t say that, I’m glad you told me.” he turned towards her.

“You’re not weirded out?” she asked, looking at him nervously.

“Nah, I’m a bit stunned at how you’ve managed to carry on like everything is fine through the entirety of our relationship though!” he said with a laugh. “And I had no idea. For someone so open, you hide it well.” he said quietly.