Condensed down to the essentials.
* * * * *
It was a Barbeque hosted by my daughter and her life partner. I was a little surprised when she introduced Alison as the love of her life. Jeanine was a wild child in college and had at least one pregnancy scare. It seemed that changing teams made her a better, calmer person. They had been married for three years and were shocked beyond words when I started pushing for grandchildren.
Alison grinned. “Have you been conspiring with my mother? She said the same a month ago when we flew down to visit. You know enough about anatomy to know it would be kind of impossible.”
“There are ways. If it isn’t homemade storebought is an option. Just a suggestion here, I’d like a grandson.”
Jeannie grinned. “We’ll get back to you in a year or so.”
Two years went by. I was pleased when the girls bought a house, partially funded by me and Alison’s mother. We each kicked in ten grand. Money well spent in my opinion. The party was their housewarming.
I could see it coming. Bets, Alison’s mother could as well. We were the only ones there over forty, the only unmatched pair in the group.
We settled at a small table off to the side. “They’re about as subtle as sledgehammers, aren’t they?”
I grinned. “I’m sure they mean well. We’re both single, we’re both important to them, if they could get us together it would make their lives much simpler.”
She smiled back. I had to admit she was a fine looking woman. Her hair was still mostly red and had two silver streaks in the front, that tended to droop over her eyes a lot. I’m not sure what color her eyes were but they looked a very pale brown, large and expressive. Her body wasn’t bad for someone who was 43, she still had a very nice shape and anything that bulged was a part that was supposed to.
“Yes, it would simplify where to spend the holidays, wouldn’t it? We’d have to live here because your house is much closer to theirs. It would make grandparent duties much simpler, wouldn’t you agree?”
“You’d move to be with me?”
“I’d move to be with my family,” she corrected gently.
“You’d be a hard woman to court. You have too much character to put up with a lot of foolishness. I’m pretty sure your ex found that out the hard way.”
“And you’re a man of strong beliefs, if your divorce is any indication. I’m sure any ‘discussions’ we would have would be spirited and intense.”
“As they should be. Just because one says it doesn’t make it right, and the other partner should be able to express their opinions and state their position while the other listens with respect.”
“I agree totally.”
I shrugged. “No other way to be. You don’t strike me as shy and retiring and Alison has told me a bit about your deeper ‘discussions’ with your ex. You’re not afraid to make a point. Did you really break his finger?”
She grinned. “He should have gotten it out of my face when I asked him to. I also have a soft side, and enjoy flowers for no reason and little unexpected gifts from time to time.”
“Obviously. If flowers and chocolates were the cost of your smiles the house would look like a florist shop and you’d have a serious problem controlling your weight.”
She gave me one of those radient smiles and I reflected a man could do a lot worse. Her smiles would be worth a lot, especially if they were directed at me.
Then she suddenly became serious. “I hate country music.” She knew I was a fan.
“I despise horror movies.” She loved them, according to Alison.
“You could go to the shows with your friends, and I’d take mine to the movies. Nothing wrong with having different interests, as long as you remember where your primary one lies.”
“Absolutely. Your significant other should be just that. The most important priority in your life.”
“Doesn’t mean we can’t try new things together. It would make us grow as a couple.”
We stopped and stared at each other. We’d only seen each other five or six times and hadn’t had more than a handful of conversations and suddenly we were in very deep waters. Jeanine chose that moment to check on us.
“You guys all right?”
“Just peachy honey. We’re doing the RDG version of a romance.”
“What?”
“The Readers Digest version. They used to put out shortened and condensed versions of popular novels to make it easier and less time consuming. That was way before your time, but I remember seeing them.”
“Uh, okay. How’s it going then?”
Bets chimed in. “Pretty well. We’ve progressed past the getting to know each other phase and we’re in the awkward stage that comes just before we get intimate. Dan just put some soft music on and I’ve lit the scented candles. Wanna hang around and see how that works out?”
“I don’t think so. I should be able to look at your faces and tell. Carry on then.”
She scurried back to Alison and they had a hurried, whispered conversation with a lot of pointed looks.
“That got their attention didn’t it?”
I grinned. “It did indeed. Now, you were saying something about getting intimate?”
“We’re both adults so I don’t see a lot of awkwardness. You’re not bad looking and in pretty good shape.”
“It’s always awkward the first time. We’re not just baring our bodies, we’re bearing our souls. Beisdes, compared to me you’re a Goddess. Maybe you have a human side and that makes you what, a demi-Goddess? You’re sharing the most intimate thing one can with another person. We’d be self-conscious, nervous, and hopeful. If we’ve gone this far we both would want their partner to have a happy ending. Just so you know, when I’m intimate with a woman, I’m intimate with every part of her. Sooner rather than later I will have kissed and nibbled on every square inch of your body, looking for your triggers and filing them away. In my opinion, it’s never about seeing stars right away but about finding comfort with what the act conveys. And just so you know, I have a very talented tongue and I’m not afraid to use it. Stars are on the menu for later.”
It seemed her eyes were a bit dialated and her breathing was a little deeper. I found it odd, since we were just playing. Besides, we were right in the middle of about forty people, at two on a sunny Saturday afternoon.
When she found her voice it was a little huskier than normal. “I don’t nibble. I consume. The first time with me would wipe out any experience you’ve ever had before me.”
“Good to know. Eventually we’d move on to considering cohabitation. A trial run of sorts. We’d get the joy of discovering each others’ annoying habits. You may hate my laugh, your snoring may get on my nerves.”
“You have a lovely laugh and I don’t snore.”
“How do you know? You wouldn’t be awake to know.”
“If I did I’m sure it would be an adorable little rumble.”
This time it was Alison’s turn to check on us. “You guys getting along?”
“Other than the snoring issue we’re fine.”
Bets laughed. “Well, that and his inability to pick up his socks. I’m wondering if he’s housebroken at all.”
“I haven’t wet the rugs yet, if that tells you anything.”
Bets looked at her daughter. “I’m afraid the honeymoon phase is over, baby. Now the real work begins.”
“Well, all right then. Call me if you need a referee.” Al was switching from face to face, like she was following a tennis match.
“WE WILL NOT involve our children in our domestic disputes. We’re mature adults perfectly capable of ironing out our differences in a peaceful manner.”
She was giggling as she walked off, no doubt to fill Jeanine’s head with our banter.
“My ex wasn’t.”
“Wasn’t what?”
“Capable of ironing out our differences in a peaceful manner. She went for the jugular, both in confrontations and court.”
“So we’re talking about the ex’s now? Mine avoided confrontation at all costs, almost as much as he dodged responsibility. If it hadn’t been for me we would never have accumulated anything, but it was all him according to the divorce papers. He squaled like a cat with its’ tail caught under a rocker when the judge gave his ruling on the division of assets. He’s living in a one bedroom apartment now and just barely making it because of his lack of budgeting skills and problems with impulse control. It seems he can’t afford his new girlfriend now.”
“Mine thought she had a perfect marriage. She was a taker and I was a giver. Anything in my power to give her she got. Her sense of entitlement got a little too big when she thought it was perfectly all right for her to take a series of lovers. After all, didn’t she always get what she wanted? When I found out she showed remorse over getting caught but not about doing it. It shocked her no end when I filed, naming two men, two married men, in the complaint.
She tried the reconciliation route but when she saw I wasn’t budging she went nuclear. She went into a rage when she found out I had already separated the money fifty fifty and she wasn’t going to get any more. I thought her head was going to explde when the judge told her the house was exempt from the settlement. Her honeys dropped her like a rock and the wives took a dim view of the whole sordid mess. One divorced her husband and the other is holding on to his marriage by a thread. A thin thread.”
Betsy sighed. “Apparently the longer you’re married the less fidelity matters to some.”
“It mattered to me. It seems it mattered to you as well. Perhaps we’re out of touch with the real world.”
“Maybe just slightly out of step. I’m sure the vast majority of couples out there are just like us and thinks committments mean something.”
“If we were committed, I’d never stray.”
“I know. Neither would I. Too much pride I guess. When I make a promise I keep it.”
“As do I. We should have met each other first.”
“Then we’d have two daughters and no in laws. I think it’s better this way. We’ve been through the fires and though we bear the scars we can hold our heads up.”
I smiled until she smiled back. “So then, it seems we’re soul mates. Maybe we should invest a little time into getting to know each other.”
Before she could answer the girls came back.
“Where are you now?”
Bets shocked them by taking my hand. “We’re in the process of planning our golden years. I can see a shiny new RV and a few grandkids to fill it with. You girls run along now and leave us to it.”
* * * * *
We did. Invest the time, I mean and found that we were as close to soul mates as two mature people could get. And she was right, she did consume me.
Gotta go now, The kids are bringing the twins by for a weekend. This will give them a break from a pair of energetic seven year olds and us some treasured grandparent experiences. Bets is the planner though she does nothing without my agreement, and we’re taking out the new RV and heading for two days at a water park. I’m looking forward to it, even at 51 she looks damn good in a bathing suit. Every time she puts one on she smirks at my expression and most times she’s gracious enough to let me help remove it. There won’t be any play this weekend, and the pressure will build until we can’t wait to get the kids back home. It happens every time.
The Readers Digest version didn’t pan out. Instead we’re involved in an epic saga that should take many volumes to complete. We get excited turning every page.
* * * * *
I wrote this in two hours, thinking about a friend of mine. I hope she likes it. As always, thanks for reading.