The Making of a Gay Disciplinarian

I read this announcement in late August 2019 and the closing date for applications was September 30th. To be eligible for consideration applicants had to be at least eighteen years of age by January 1st 2020 but no older than nineteen. By chance I fitted the age requirement perfectly. The other notable thing was that there was no question of academic qualifications mentioned; it seemed that the Royal Navy was prepared to consider anyone and everyone for this training course; and as far as qualifications were concerned; well, as you know already, I didn’t have any. But my night classes really helped me when it came to filling in the application form which was long and detailed. I posted my completed application to some address in the south of England by early September and then sat round for some three weeks on those proverbial tenterhooks waiting for a reply. I had never really received much mail at all in the past but each and every day I looked into our mail-box to see of anything had arrived. When it finally did, I was at first overjoyed and then immediately apprehensive, as I opened the envelope, wondering what it would say.

The letter said that I had been provisionally accepted for the Senior Cadet Training Course, but that my final acceptance was subject to my satisfactory performance at a two day evaluation session to be held on October 15th and 16th at the Royal Navy Training Facility in in Dartmouth. Enclosed with the letter were a second class return rail travel warrant from Bradford to Exeter and a return bus pass from Exeter to Dartmouth. The instructions were very precise; applicants had to arrive on October 14th and depart of October 17th. As far as clothing was concerned applicants were required to wear a suit and tie and come with two changes of underwear and two white shirts and a tie. Conventional black leather shoes were also required. So here was my immediate problem; I possessed neither a suit nor white shirts nor a tie; and as for black leather shoes; well who the hell wore such antiquated footwear today? Frankly it all sounded as if it came out of the ark. But so much did I want to be accepted for the cadet training course, that I went out and acquired all the prescribed clothing.

This was the first time I had consciously gone out and bought a complete set of clothing, for like most working class lads of my age, I wore T-shirts, jeans and trainers. But I went into town to an up-market men’s outfitters – the places I normally patronised didn’t even sell suits – and laid out what seemed to me like a small fortune to get myself togged up for the evaluation. And I have to say, that when I got home and put on the whole outfit, admiring myself in front of the mirror, I thought I looked really great; it was as if I was looking at a different person; I can tell you that it did a great deal for my self-esteem; so it seemed that there was some method in the Navy’s apparent madness. And then there was the question of a suitcase; I didn’t have one and neither did my father; so that too had to be bought.

But by the time October 14th rolled round, I was fully equipped and really looking forward to my trip down south. You have to understand that as a lower working class northerner, I had never got any further than Leeds in the past; so even the train journey south was quite an adventure. I had several days of holiday still due so I took these in October. And then on the fatidic day, at what seemed the crack of dawn, I took the train from Bradford to Leeds, where I boarded the 09:11 express to Exeter. From Exeter station I then took the bus which brought me to the Dartmouth bus terminal, from where I could walk to the Royal Navy facility where the evaluation was to be held. Little did I imagine that later this day my life would totally change; and I am not now talking about the Cadet Training Course; but the unexpected so often happens.

On arrival at the training facility, I was received, at a desk in the entrance, by a uniformed officer, who I later learned was a non-commissioned petty officer; I have to say he was very brisk and efficient, which I was rapidly to learn was the way the navy functioned. After registration a young regular sailor in uniform, not much older than me by the look of him, took me to my billet; this turned out to be a double-bedded room, which I was clearly going to share with some other candidate. He left me with the information that supper would be at seven, that the bell would ring at ten to the hour and that I would find the mess-hall in the main building. He left me with the gentle warning that, in his opinion, if I valued my chances, I should not be late; I was then left to myself.

I was not long alone, however, as the same young sailor came back with my room-mate about ten minutes later. I had very mixed feeling about sharing a room with another man, as I had never in my life slept other than by myself. However, as the two of us shook hands and introduced ourselves to each other, I saw that the young man with whom I was to share the room was a very attractive looking character indeed; handsome to a fault, with dark blond hair; and even in a suit, I could see that he was someone, who like myself, clearly looked after his body; at first sight speaking as someone with absolutely no sexual experience whatsoever, I have to say that I found him sexually extremely attractive, which induced in me a certain curiosity coupled with a degree of nervous apprehension.

His name, he told me was Martin Black and like me, he was from the industrial north; from Leeds, in fact. I wondered if the powers that be had billeted to two of us together, thinking that we might get on together in what was a very different environment from that in which we both presently lived. How we two came to be put together in a double-room was never very clear, for as I saw later, other candidates were allocated to ten-bed dormitories. So my new companion and I found ourselves in sort of a privileged position from the start. And it was that simple unforeseen chance by which we two had been brought together, which was totally to change my life.

Until it was time to go to find the mess, we began to try to get to know one another. It turned out that he, like me, was in a dead-end job: a building labourer with no prospects; like me he had somehow seen the same announcement, which had now brought us together in Dartmouth. Like me, he was hoping that the cadet course would give him the opportunity to get out of the boring rut of his present

existence and give him an opportunity to do something more interesting and worthwhile with his life. For a while we conducted a somewhat stilted conversation, as we gently tiptoed verbally around each other, trying to identify some points in common; but very quickly Martin brought the conversation around to that perennial subject: sex.

“Got a girlfriend,” Martin asked.

“No, not really; well not at all, in fact.”

“You surprise me; a good looking guy like you and not attached.”

“Well to be quite honest, I’m really rather shy; and I find girls very difficult.” That was the way I put it as I did not want to say straight-put that I was not interested in the opposite sex at all. “How about you? You got somebody regular?”

“No, not really, I’m a bit like you, I suspect; frankly women scare me.” He had clearly taken up on my remark about finding girls difficult and had decided to burn his boats, so to speak as he said: “Well look here, I may as well square with you right now, as we are sharing a room together for the next couple of nights and I don’t want you to get the wrong idea about me; well anyway, the fact of the matter is that I’m gay; I hope sharing with a gay guy does not offend you; and believe me I’m not at all dangerous; I’m not much of a predator and I’m not going to rape you.” he concluded with a laugh.

So there I had it; this handsome looking stud, whom I, the shrinking violet of a gay virgin, had found lusciously attractive at very first sight was, was gay: I was sharing a room with a real live homosexual. Now I knew, or at least I thought that I knew, that I was the same; but as you know my timidity had, until now, stopped me going any

further than being, how shall I put it, a “theoretical gay”. The question was: What would happen next; what should I now say to Martin?

So rather than reveal my own thoughts on the matter, I decided to find out more about Martin and his sexual activities. I said to him: “So, Martin, have you got a regular boy-friend or partner then?”

“No not really; I’ve known since I was fifteen that I was gay but it’s only in the last year, since my eighteenth birthday that I have actually started having sex with other guys, In fact, it all happened for the first time at my eighteenth birthday bash. I found myself in a clinch with another guy, whom I didn’t actually know at the time; he was a friend of a friend who had just been brought along; and well, you know how things happen; I don’t need to tell you all the gory details, but one thing led to another; So to cut a long story short, we finished up having sex with one another. Well actually, to tell the honest truth, he fucked me and it was not until a few days later when we met again at a mutual friend’s place, and I had my first fuck as I fucked him for the first time. So, you could say I’m sort of an advanced beginner. But don’t get me wrong, I’ve had plenty of experience since then. I really enjoy having sex with other guys and in fact, I’ve fucked and been fucked by at least ten different guys since that first time; so I think, by now I know which end is up. But there is no one special at the moment. So how about you? No girl friend; so how is your sex life?”

This question struck me like an arrow in the heart; Martin was very direct and came straight to the point; I could feel my face going red; the conversation had taken a horribly intimate turn which I had not at all expected; but now, having heard in some detail from Martin about his sex life, he, not unnaturally, wanted to know about mine. But as you already know I had nothing concrete to tell him other than that apart from jerking off from time to time (it was getting more and more frequent as time passed as I found, quite naturally, I suppose, that I needed sexual relief more regularly) I did not actually have a sex life; but how did I being to confess that here I was, eighteen years old, and still, in every way, a virgin: I’d neither fucked nor been fucked! I was tongue-tied with embarrassment.

Martin clearly saw that there was a problem and said: “Come on Kevin; fess up; what’s the matter; it can’t be so bad that you can’t bring yourself to talk about it, can it? Have you been dumped or something? Look here Kevin. I’m a good and sympathetic listener; so just lay your cards on the table; I don’t bite.”

I have to say that I had never expected such a sympathetic response to my obvious difficulty; and so I decided to come clean and tell Martin about my problem. Taking a deep breath I began: “Martin, I am really very embarrassed to tell you this, but the simple fact of the matter is that here I am, eighteen years old with absolutely no sexual experience at all. I have just been so timid even to think about developing a relationship with anyone, male or female. But as I already told you, I am not really interested in women and I find I do like looking at other men, especially well set up guys such as you. But, to date, looking is as far as I have got I’ve looked at all sort of male porn sites on the internet so I’m fully aware of what guys do to each other when they get together. So I sort of guess that I am like you: a gay: a homosexual; but I have never dared to put my thoughts to the test; at the moment I suppose I’m what might be called a gay- in-waiting”.

“The fact of the matter is that all my friends are so into pulling the girls – it’s all they think and talk about – and I know for a fact that they hate gays; in fact, certain of them are gay baiters, so as you can imagine I’ve kept quiet about my hidden secret. In fact, one of the reasons I have applied for this training course, is that I would be living and working in an all male environment if I were accepted. So there, my friend, you have a more or less complete picture of my non-existent sex-life; the nearest I get to sex is when I jerk-off to relieve myself. So as you can see, Martin, I’m really a bit of a basket case when it comes to sex. This is the first time I have ever told anyone about my problems and you know, at the end of the day, it was much simpler than I thought when I began; it turned out to be so much easier than I ever thought, unburdening myself to you; someone like you, whom I might never see again after these two days.”

At that moment the bell rang announcing that it was time to move to the mess for supper and so our conversation and its possible repercussions were curtailed; curtailed but not abandoned, as Martin clearly had every intention of “showing me the light”, as he put it later that same evening, when in the privacy of our room, he launched me into my very first experience of gay sex; I say launched, for what he did to me was much akin in my mind, to the launching of a new ship, when that bottle of champagne breaks across the prow of the

vessel.

The supper over, the camp commander lectured is for about half an hour on the evaluation tests which we would all undergo over the next two days, starting at seven tomorrow, immediately after breakfast; reveille was at six; breakfast at six-thirty; our day then began at seven and would end at six in the evening with only one hour break for lunch at noon. It was clear that the British Navy did not hang around.

After we were dismissed for the evening Martin and I moved over to the bar in the mess and had a few drinks with some of the other candidates before going back to our room. I have to say that I was somewhat apprehensive about what might happen once we were alone again together; I had exposed my vulnerability to my room-mate, who now knew that he was sharing with a totally inexperienced guy who felt he was gay but who had never ever acted upon his convictions. I need not have worried for Martin had no intention of letting the occasion pass.

“OK Kevin: so let’s talk turkey; as I see it you are up the proverbial creek without a paddle at the moment; you think that you are gay but have done nothing actively to try to confirm your thoughts on the matter. So why not let me take you in hand right now and show you the ropes. No, don’t look shocked; you have to find out sometime whether you truly are a homosexual or whether it is all just in your mind; you have to find out whether you want to become a practising gay: a guy who has sex for pleasure with other men of similar inclination, or whether you want to try for a normal life with a member of the opposite sex in whom you say that you have no interest. But one thing is sure; in my view you need to make some sort of choice about your sex life and pretty damn quick at that; a well set-up guy like you cannot go on much longer without having some sort of regular sexual activity.”

“Look here, Kevin; not to mince words and to call a spade a shovel as we northerners do, fucking is an absolutely essential activity for all men; we are all programmed to do it by nature. You simply cannot go on denying yourself what is possibly the most wonderful thing in life; and I can tell you that jerking yourself off is no substitute at all for having sex with another warm body; believe me, sexual intercourse is truly one of the great things in life. You know, aged only eighteen, I would hate to live without having sex with another guy; nothing gives me greater pleasure than the sex act; it’s a toy which never fails to please! So, what do you say? Shall we give it a whirl together? It’s got to happen sometime Kevin, and there is no time like the present. So come on; pluck up your courage and say yes; I know just how you are feeling; it’s like taking a step into the unknown: but just trust me; it’ll all be OK and I promise you will love it.”

Martin really did have the gift of the gab and I did not know what to say; but taking my silence as my agreement, Martin simply began stripping off in front of me. In a few second he was standing there, totally unembarrassed, stark-naked. I had, until this moment, not seen my roommate naked; but now here he was, a beautifully carved and muscular figure which testified to many serious hours in the gym;

and he was already sporting a rock-hard erection to boot. His cock was well balanced between length and girth, and, in its present erect state, must have measured at least eighteen cm in length. But the thing I noticed immediately was that Martin had been circumcised, which is not at all common among Englishmen; but it was precisely the lack of foreskin which exposed a well-rounded head, set off from a dead-straight shaft by a well defined rim which made this guy’s man-meat so very attractive to my eye.

I had never before been alone in the presence of another guy, whose intention was clearly to have sex with me. I had seen other guys equipment in the showers at the gym, but I had never until now been able to feast my eyes on such a magnificent sexual tool primed for use. With my eyes glued on Martin’s cock, I could feel my own sex stirring in my trousers, which I suppose told me that this was the moment when I should capitulate and let this young stud take my anal virginity; let him fuck me. What the hell; as Martin had said, it had to happen sometime and there was no time like the present, So I finally threw caution to the winds and started stripping off in front of the man who was to introduce me to the art of gay sex. I can tell you that once I had made the decision to go the whole hog, I had no hesitation in stripping and standing stark naked in front of Martin; any sense of embarrassment I might have had just disappeared.

He and I had very similarly physiques and mine was at least equal to his; and as far as that all important organ with which we were about to commune together was concerned, well mine was at least as attractive as his. Oh to hell with false modesty; my penis is 18 cm long when soft and well over that when hard; so I felt in no way inferior to Martin as we stood there in our birthday suits, sizing each other up. What Martin had and which I did not, was experience; and that he was now about to share with me and bring me into the real world of gay sex.

If my eyes had been glued on Martin’s cock as he stood there naked, his were now bulging out of his head as he saw my equipment. “Crikey Moses,” he said, “Where the fuck did you get that tool from? It’s absolutely enormous; one of the biggest and best I have ever seen, How on earth have you managed not to have sex with such magnificent equipment to hand? I really hope that you have not been slinging me a line about your virginity and sexual inexperience, to make a fool out of me. Frankly, Kevin, just looking at you, you are just so sexually attractive that I find it hard to believe that you have never ever had sex with anyone, male or female. How could you resist with the equipment you have?”

“Come on now Kevin; get real: you could have any chick or guy you want; a guy like you is just made for sex. So please don’t tell me now that you don’t want me to fuck you; otherwise, God help me, I’ll rape you; Kevin you are just so lusciously attractive that I really can’t wait any longer to get started. So in case you have not got the message, I wanted to help you get started; to give you that first time experience; but believe me, now that I see you stripped for action, I kid you not my friend; I want to fuck you and fuck you really hard right now.”

By now I was sort of overwhelmed by the undoubted sincere praise I was getting from Martin and there was no way that I could stop what was going to happen; in fact, being brutally honest with myself, there was no way I wanted to stop what Martin was proposing to do to me. He stood there for a few moments gazing at me with lustful eyes; then he approached me and wrapped his arms around me and kissed me full on the mouth, which I found the most intimate act I had ever experienced in my life. Better put and more realistically, it was the only intimate act I had ever experienced, as until that moment no guy, or girl for that matter, had ever touched me; but with Martin it was a moment of sheer magic.